Osu

[Urgan]

31 minutes ago, Kishi said:

I'm feeling some fatigue, and I'm not sure if it's the cut or if it's the fact that my sleep hygiene has fallen way off. I think I'm just the kind of person who's up at dawn no matter how much sleep he's gotten if it's a weekday. So, that's something I need to account for going forward.

 

[Kishi]

15 hours ago, Urgan said:

 

 

I mean, it probably is? But like, only one of those is volitional, so I have to do something about the other.

 

*

 

So, two guesses as to whether or not I made judo last night.

 

I made sure I didn't waste the time - I did write, and I've got my Simple back, doing 100 swings and 10 get ups w/ the 32 under 16 minutes. Elbow is none the worse for the wear. But I still didn't make it out.

 

Part of the reason I didn't make it is that I trained from home, and there was a lot more traffic getting back there than I was expecting. And the reason I trained from home is that a lot of my recent good results have been tied to peri-training nutrition. I had cooked sweet potatoes and protein for the eating, but what I had was too big for my lunch box, so I didn't bring it with me.

 

I did my push ups too, incidentally, and I'm still gaining ground on those, but by the time I was done and out the door again it was too late to make it. And I don't feel guilty about it, but I do feel frustrated that I didn't plan better.

 

There's no reason, historically, to think I'm going to make Saturday's class, but to hell and be damned. I have to try.

 

At least I managed to get a good night's sleep, though. I got everything done good and early and got to bed a good hour earlier than normal. Got a full night's sleep for my trouble, which is pretty exciting. Of course, the real test will be if I can pull that off again tonight, since K-sensei doesn't have a sense of time, but I'm actually kind of optimistic about that.

 

In the meantime, single leg progression, rope climb progression, front lever progression, and sprints because my legs feel good and ready today. Let's rage.

[Teirin]

Yay for a good night of sleep!!!!!  *tired rage*

[Mistr]

Excellent that you made good use of your time not at judo. Looking at your posts, there is quite a contrast in how enthusiastic you are about the progressions you are working on at home and in the gym compared to how you feel about judo. How are you feeling about your training?

[Treva]

12 hours ago, Kishi said:

I made sure I didn't waste the time - I did write, and I've got my Simple back, doing 100 swings and 10 get ups w/ the 32 under 16 minutes.

YOU ARE A BEAST.  ugh BEAST MODE KISHI WAAAAAAAT.

 

 

[Kishi]

15 hours ago, Mistr said:

Excellent that you made good use of your time not at judo. Looking at your posts, there is quite a contrast in how enthusiastic you are about the progressions you are working on at home and in the gym compared to how you feel about judo. How are you feeling about your training?

 

Well, to save you a rant, judo essentially feels like a negotiable because everything we do in other arts touches on it in some way or other. I do judo throws in karate and I learn entries in kali, or at the very least I learn how to maintain a good mindset about those things. Versus, the strength work I do feels non-negotiable, because it makes me better at everything I do, including the time I spend off the mat, which is the majority of my time. The cleaning and chores and such I wind up doing also feel the same; I just don't take time to fix things and I'm tired of all these boxes sitting around my place.

 

Of course, an alternative would be to do my push ups afterward, as it seems no matter how early I'm done, I always end up cooking dinner at roughly the same time. That would be the simplest fix.

 

16 hours ago, Treva said:

YOU ARE A BEAST.  ugh BEAST MODE KISHI WAAAAAAAT.

 

 

 

Nothing special. Just the men's Simple requirements from Simple and Sinister. For my next trick, same thing, but with 40 kg.

 

*

 

Raged. It was pretty great.

 

Warmed Up

 

Assisted Squats: 1x21

Integrated Mobility: DONE

 

Half Squats: 1x15

Integrated Mobility: DONE

 

Full Squats: 1x9

Integrated Mobility: DONE

 

Elevated Deck Squats: 5x10

Integrated Mobility: DONE

• Somebody forgot to turn on the A/C in the gym. Otherwise, good. Used one less mat than I had to last time on the deck squats. Will be able to go one lower.

High Rows: 5x9

Integrated Mobility: DONE

• Got all my reps, but had to take more rest to get there. It's okay. I'm tracking where and when that has to happen so I can adjust.

Hollow Body Tuck Holds: 5x60s

Integrated Mobility: DONE

• DID THEM - but had to rest. Yesterday was a really low-energy day for me, even after having gotten more sleep.

Did sprints afterward. Made it to 6 before my ankle started talking to me, so I stopped running.

 

Karate afterward was good. We worked on some stuff for the open house next week, and I got my butt kicked in sparring. Which happens. You have bad rounds and good.

 

Had to stand my ground and refuse to throw waifu, though. Mostly because she was skittish about being thrown in the demo; I got to the point where I could feel where her balance point was and how to get her off of it, but when K-sensei said to take the step, I told him no. I kept hearing J-sensei's voice in my head - "You can't go with that woman" - and I listened to it. Afterward, K-sensei said he would have thrown her, to which I pointed out that if he had, he would have been able to argue his way out of it, which he was at least willing to admit was true. I could just hear how it would have gone in my head if I'd done it: "Who's the brown belt, [Kishi]? Who's the brown belt?"

 

Well, I'm the fucking brown belt, sir, and I'm taking responsibility for my training partner's safety. Deal with it.

 

Anyway, quiet night tonight. That Cultured Friend got accepted to work in the Citadel Library, so I'm taking my chances to hang with him while I can. Off to see a double feature of Better Off Dead and Joe Versus the Volcano. The real trick will be in how well I manage my downtime afterward and how quick I get to bed.

[Urgan]

47 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Had to stand my ground and refuse to throw waifu, though. Mostly because she was skittish about being thrown in the demo; I got to the point where I could feel where her balance point was and how to get her off of it, but when K-sensei said to take the step, I told him no. I kept hearing J-sensei's voice in my head - "You can't go with that woman" - and I listened to it. Afterward, K-sensei said he would have thrown her, to which I pointed out that if he had, he would have been able to argue his way out of it, which he was at least willing to admit was true. I could just hear how it would have gone in my head if I'd done it: "Who's the brown belt, [Kishi]? Who's the brown belt?"

 

Well, I'm the fucking brown belt, sir, and I'm taking responsibility for my training partner's safety. Deal with it.

 

This strategy just might work. Toe the line, refuse to go over, and either make her grow into being an Adult Martial Arts Person or make it obvious to the powers that be how uncomfortable and incomplete training on her terms are. 

[Treva]

4 hours ago, Kishi said:

Raged. It was pretty great.

just gonna put it out there that you are my favorite and we clearly have the best guild leader.  That's all.

 

4 hours ago, Kishi said:

Had to stand my ground and refuse to throw waifu, though. Mostly because she was skittish about being thrown in the demo; I got to the point where I could feel where her balance point was and how to get her off of it, but when K-sensei said to take the step, I told him no. I kept hearing J-sensei's voice in my head - "You can't go with that woman" - and I listened to it. Afterward, K-sensei said he would have thrown her, to which I pointed out that if he had, he would have been able to argue his way out of it, which he was at least willing to admit was true. I could just hear how it would have gone in my head if I'd done it: "Who's the brown belt, [Kishi]? Who's the brown belt?"

 

Well, I'm the fucking brown belt, sir, and I'm taking responsibility for my training partner's safety. Deal with it.

Above is an accurate depiction of Kishi slaying it in terms of being a mature martial artist being awesome.  

But in all seriousness, that is a very mature and wise response of you, if I am permitted to apply that judgement to what you have done.  It showed you knew where you were, and that you were not willing to unsafely push your partner's limitations.  I think it was very, very, very smart and also quite safe.  So what you're saying is we should pit you against a kobayashi maru situation next.

 

Hope you enjoy your down time!!!  You have earned it.

 

[Kishi]

20 hours ago, Urgan said:

 

This strategy just might work. Toe the line, refuse to go over, and either make her grow into being an Adult Martial Arts Person or make it obvious to the powers that be how uncomfortable and incomplete training on her terms are. 

 

Y'know, I hadn't thought of it that way, but it does make a lot of sense. Maybe it'll force them to grow and reconsider. It might be for the best. After all, we do have the open house in a week, and there's the potential for more bodies being out there on the mats. This is something we really need to consider.

 

16 hours ago, Treva said:

just gonna put it out there that you are my favorite and we clearly have the best guild leader.  That's all.

 

 

16 hours ago, Treva said:

Above is an accurate depiction of Kishi slaying it in terms of being a mature martial artist being awesome.  

 

Ooh, geez, I get an Iroh gif, I'm not ready for this kind of responsibility

 

16 hours ago, Treva said:

But in all seriousness, that is a very mature and wise response of you, if I am permitted to apply that judgement to what you have done.  It showed you knew where you were, and that you were not willing to unsafely push your partner's limitations.  I think it was very, very, very smart and also quite safe.  So what you're saying is we should pit you against a kobayashi maru situation next.

 

You are totally allowed to apply this judgment when it results in you saying nice things about me.

 

But, yeah, I mean. This is something we have to do now. And if I'm completely honest about it, I'm just tired of being put in situations where I end up blasting Waifu and then getting blamed for doing what I'm told. And anyway, there wasn't really a need for me to complete the throw, since she'll be the one throwing and she was allowed to throw me, so. We all got what we needed.

 

Also, the Kobayashi Maru is basically The Trolley Problem IN SPACE, and I'm convinced that it's not really about winning so much as it's about having a good rationalization for why you do what you do in that case. I can see a few different ways to play that out, but nothing that really wins.

 

*

 

Friday was quiet and cultured. Took in Better Off Dead and Joe Versus The Volcano.

 

Better Off Dead was amazing. Imagine turn of the 2000s cartoons - Fairly Odd Parents, Danny Phantom, Jimmy Neutron. Now imagine it as live action and set in 1985, with all the 80s tropes turned up to 11. That's Better Off Dead. It's a national freaking treasure. See it if you get the chance.

 

Joe Versus The Volcano is what my friend referred to as "a whimsical existentialist" film,  kind of the vein of Groundhog Day. It's got some problematic bits - there's the Magical Negro trope in the first act, and the third act essentially whitewashes Polynesian culture with a dash of White Saviorism for flavor (although, in the end, white people mess up everything, which I would say is a pretty accurate summation of what we do historically, so). OTOH, though, all media is a product of the time it was made, and looking for something to be perfect for all of time as our understanding of oppression and systemic violence increases is a pretty tall order. Taken for what it is, it's really good. It is definitely existentialist in that the protagonists deal with a lot of questions about what their authentic lives are and what they want them to be. I'd in turn say that it's a very Marxist film too, in that the protagonists are consistently exploited by systems and then by individuals who ultimately seek to keep them from living their authentic lives by divorcing them from the products of their labor, and even their lives.

 

It's worth seeing, although I don't think I necessarily regard it as highly as my friend does.

 

Anyway, training and then off to hang with friends tonight. Let's get it.

[Urgan]

6 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Y'know, I hadn't thought of it that way, but it does make a lot of sense. Maybe it'll force them to grow and reconsider. It might be for the best. After all, we do have the open house in a week, and there's the potential for more bodies being out there on the mats. This is something we really need to consider.

 

6 minutes ago, Kishi said:

But, yeah, I mean. This is something we have to do now. And if I'm completely honest about it, I'm just tired of being put in situations where I end up blasting Waifu and then getting blamed for doing what I'm told. And anyway, there wasn't really a need for me to complete the throw, since she'll be the one throwing and she was allowed to throw me, so. We all got what we needed.

 

I honestly think they don't even fully understand the situation they're putting you in. I have to believe that, or else they're just Grade A Jerks. Your mission is to make sure to explain it with Examples.

[Kishi]

23 hours ago, Urgan said:

 

 

I honestly think they don't even fully understand the situation they're putting you in. I have to believe that, or else they're just Grade A Jerks. Your mission is to make sure to explain it with Examples.

 

I think it's definitely that they don't understand. The way J-sensei explained it to me, K-sensei is the kind of martial artist who thinks technique trumps everything. He doesn't understand that when he puts me in the ring with an older woman who's about 2/3 as heavy as me with weaker technique that she can't overcome my technique with correct technique. K-sensei thinks that if Waifu puts up a block or moves well or does any of those things that she can stop me; he does not realize 1) that this is not true due to the disparities, but also 2) I can't quite feel how hard I'm going yet. Truth is, I could blast her and it would feel like a flick of the wrist to me.

 

He also doesn't understand exactly that Waifu isn't doing this for herself, and I don't think he quite gets what that's doing to her training. Even after a year of training in this space, she still can't distinguish between a jab and a cross, and her movement is a hot mess. There's a certain amount of intention one has to approach training with in order for it to even count as training, and I don't think she does that.

 

And Waifu, for her part, doesn't seem to have much memory or respect for how hard I'm trying to get this right. She used to laugh at me because I tried to be gentle, and though she gets it now, I'm fairly certain she's going to forget it. And that's what'll set up the next crisis, when it happens. And it is a when. It is not an if, because statistically speaking, there is a chance that it can happen again.

 

The only way I can think of to stretch this out is to set the line, toe it, but never ever cross it no matter how much they want me to. Because they don't see the line until after I've crossed it. They don't even realize they're the ones who drew it.

 

*

 

Saturday training was fun, but also weird. I actually made it to judo, but I got there late, and it was nothing but kids on the mat, so I thought it might have been a kid's class or something. So I sat out. J-sensei walked up afterward and was like, "Why didn't you get on the mat?"

 

"Uh. I thought it was a kid's class, sir."

 

"Nah, they just happened to be the ones who showed up."

 

So, huh.

 

Anyway, had to teach some at Kali. It just kind of happened - we got into some technical transitional stuff with two blades and the new folk had a hard time getting it, so I had to break it down with them and help them practice it. They were good students, and it was fun to teach, but it was a challenge too because I had to pick up and internalize this stuff from Manong, who really has a tendency to not explain so much what it is I'm doing. I never really had to explain it until yesterday, so I think that delayed their ability to pick it up a bit.

 

Stayed after to clean the place up, then went to go play games with friends. Afterward, found a sweet Red wine that's local to NC, which was delicious and also is incredibly dangerous because it can sneak up on you.

 

Fortunately, no hangover or anything like that today, so I'm off to gym where I'll play with push ups, sprints, and the next step of the Manna progressions. This will be fun because I'll get to do Jefferson Curls again, which I like a lot.

[Kishi]

Sunday in the bag.

 

Incline Push Ups: 1x9

Integrated Mobility: DONE

 

Push Ups: 4x9

Integrated Mobility: DONE

• Gah, this move is hard the way that GB does it. If I could just rep out with regular form that would be one thing, but they insist on scapular articulation - protraction up top, retraction down below. The result is that you have to move at a slower cadence over a longer distance, and that adds up as the reps pile on.

Sprints: 10

 

Tuck Ups: 1x9

Integrated Mobility: DONE

 

Straddle Tuck Ups: 3x3

Integrated Mobility: DONE

• Feels good to be back to these.

Dumbbell Pull Overs: 1x18x20

• Use these to help stretch the chest. I know, it's typically derided as bro-logic, but that's because most bros have normal chests.

High Row Bar Active Hang: 1x30s/side

• This is some PT I'm doing for my elbow because it was pointed out that elbow pain can sometimes be a function of weakness in either the wrist or the shoulder. So, set the bar to height, grip it closer to center, lean back, and keep your shoulders parallel to the ground. Goal is to get to 60s/side

Finished up on the recumbent bike and some rolling for my hamstring. It's feeling better since I stopped some of the extra stretching I was doing; I suspect that for the time being, it will serve me to focus more on integrated mobility rather than adding stretches on. After all, that's what Karate is for.

 

Should be a quiet day today. I got down early last night, and while it wasn't as early as I would have liked, it's still loads better than it's been. I'm feeling it.

[Kishi]

Ugh. I'm getting more sleep, but I seem to be waking in the middle of a sleep cycle rather than getting the full thing. Overall, it's better, but it does make for a groggier kind of morning.

 

Yesterday was a rest day, and rest days are best days. Unless it's Chest Day, and as most days are Chest Days, those also are Best Days.

 

But yeah, rest. Since main Monday DM-san is still recovering from his bout in the hospital, we wound up doing more Blades In The Dark. This time we had a train job, having to sneak some illicit cargo past customs. It went entirely too well. It went so well that at one point we had to do teamwork to get the cargo onto a cart, and we all rolled the highest possible success roll. We moved that cargo like we were male models, clothes suddenly ripping in artful places, other cargo folk wanting us to help them with their loads. It was great!

 

Also, our paperwork was really good for getting us past customs, and after-job character development went really well.

 

Man, I really like this game.

 

Anyway, S&S and Karate on the docket tonight. There's kind of a boss fight coming up in that we'll have an open house on Saturday, and I'm fairly confident I'll be up for all demos since I do all arts. So I'm debating whether or not to scale back the strength and conditioning stuff this week so that I can show well. Presently leaning yes, as I've been pushing for the past few weeks, and this being the 4th week would fit in nicely as a sort of deload, like what I used to do. But OTOH, dunno if where I am in GST really warrants that yet.

[Urgan]

12 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Anyway, S&S and Karate on the docket tonight. There's kind of a boss fight coming up in that we'll have an open house on Saturday, and I'm fairly confident I'll be up for all demos since I do all arts. So I'm debating whether or not to scale back the strength and conditioning stuff this week so that I can show well. Presently leaning yes, as I've been pushing for the past few weeks, and this being the 4th week would fit in nicely as a sort of deload, like what I used to do. But OTOH, dunno if where I am in GST really warrants that yet.

 

The strategic application of food would no doubt help whether you deload or no. Yes? Both for the performance and the recovery directly after....

[Kishi]

11 minutes ago, Urgan said:

 

The strategic application of food would no doubt help whether you deload or no. Yes? Both for the performance and the recovery directly after....

 

You mean cutting deeper or eating more?

[Urgan]

Just now, Kishi said:

 

You mean cutting deeper or eating more?

 

Eating more--hitting maintenance during a period of increased activity shouldn't derail any of your goals.

[Kishi]

1 minute ago, Urgan said:

 

Eating more--hitting maintenance during a period of increased activity shouldn't derail any of your goals.

 

Even with taking a deload for the week?

[Urgan]

2 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Even with taking a deload for the week?

 

If you're not just sitting on your behind all week. But it could be as easy as a couple hundred well-timed calories around dojo time. Nothing crazy (unless your stomach feels like a bottomless void afterward, of course.....but maybe that's just me lol).

[Kishi]

Just now, Urgan said:

 

If you're not just sitting on your behind all week. But it could be as easy as a couple hundred well-timed calories around dojo time. Nothing crazy (unless your stomach feels like a bottomless void afterward, of course.....but maybe that's just me lol).

 

Well, to tell you the truth, it's not like I'm not tempted. After all, if I'm doing GST almost purely now, with kettlebells to preserve real world S&C and lots of martial arts... well, reality is, maybe it's time for me to hit maintenance. After all, GST's philosophy on the matter is that one should stick to eating at maintenance and let the body recompose itself as it grows in its capabilities. And, since every single thing I have to measure my progress is flawed, perhaps the one thing I should care about is my ability to do more things better.

 

(That's not just the cut talking. I've been ruminating on this for a while. The only thing is, they're Team Breakfast, and with my heart experiment on I can't really be, but the overall point of sticking to maintenance still stands).

[Urgan]

3 minutes ago, Kishi said:

 

Well, to tell you the truth, it's not like I'm not tempted. After all, if I'm doing GST almost purely now, with kettlebells to preserve real world S&C and lots of martial arts... well, reality is, maybe it's time for me to hit maintenance. After all, GST's philosophy on the matter is that one should stick to eating at maintenance and let the body recompose itself as it grows in its capabilities. And, since every single thing I have to measure my progress is flawed, perhaps the one thing I should care about is my ability to do more things better.

 

(That's not just the cut talking. I've been ruminating on this for a while. The only thing is, they're Team Breakfast, and with my heart experiment on I can't really be, but the overall point of sticking to maintenance still stands).

 

A period of maintenance, whether a day or so for Open House or a few weeks certainly wouldn't be the death of you lol. I would say having enough energy to do the things should be paramount--although to get below a certain low percentage of body fat this has to go out the window. I understand this is a set of circumstances that will have one praying for death by the time one approaches goal %, so. Sign me up for Team Performance.

[Kishi]

22 hours ago, Urgan said:

 

A period of maintenance, whether a day or so for Open House or a few weeks certainly wouldn't be the death of you lol. I would say having enough energy to do the things should be paramount--although to get below a certain low percentage of body fat this has to go out the window. I understand this is a set of circumstances that will have one praying for death by the time one approaches goal %, so. Sign me up for Team Performance.

 

I suspect you're right. I think this is probably something where I still hear the voice in my head telling me that I can, in fact, have it all. I need to accept that this is not true and figure out what I want. There's no real percentage in cutting for me beyond soothing my vanity, but that's not worth anything either. So, might as well just eat well, train hard, and let the body adapt as it will.

 

*

 

Tuesday down.

 

Tuesday was complicated by my need to go looking for some additional food. Wound up having to pass through a few different grocery stores, which took time.

 

Still managed to get some kettlebell work in. I took an easy day on account of feeling kind of headachey and tired, so I played with lighter bells and focused on various aspects of technique. I wasn't able to get all the reps, but I still got something, and that's important, if for no other reason than that it keeps my head in the game and keeps me honest about what I'm doing.

 

Karate afterward was focused on various aspects of the Open House. We'll be practicing again come Thursday. It's nothing we haven't done before, but we generally don't have an audience. The biggest lesson we're taking right now is to just play things off and be deliberate if we mess it up.

 

The round of sparring was good. Made K-sensei move a lot. Didn't follow through or capitalize on things very well, though. Oh well. Also, he really, really wants me to shadowbox, and there's really no way I can do that unless I clean up my house, which, I mean. I don't see how I'm supposed to do that when everyone wants me everywhere all the time. I think I'm going to have to disappoint some people at some point in the near future if I mean to make any progress on this.

 

Anyway, judo and push ups tonight. Should be good.

[Urgan]

15 minutes ago, Kishi said:

I suspect you're right. I think this is probably something where I still hear the voice in my head telling me that I can, in fact, have it all. I need to accept that this is not true and figure out what I want. There's no real percentage in cutting for me beyond soothing my vanity, but that's not worth anything either. So, might as well just eat well, train hard, and let the body adapt as it will.

 

You might be able to, but the more criteria you add to the list that is "all," the more delicate the balancing act. I don't think "can you" is the question we should ponder too hard, it's more like, "do you really want to?" The risk:benefit on that doesn't seem favorable to staying the cut course given that easing up just a smidge on calories (I would dump the extra into carbs and protein for energy + recovery, FWIW) might just allow you to strike the best path for keeping up with all the goals in light of increased demands. This sounds like a performance as much as a training, which demands a certain level of respect and concentration of resources (you know that already, I'm just sayin'). 

 

32 minutes ago, Kishi said:

The round of sparring was good. Made K-sensei move a lot. Didn't follow through or capitalize on things very well, though. Oh well. Also, he really, really wants me to shadowbox, and there's really no way I can do that unless I clean up my house, which, I mean. I don't see how I'm supposed to do that when everyone wants me everywhere all the time. I think I'm going to have to disappoint some people at some point in the near future if I mean to make any progress on this.

 

Can't be everything to everyone every time. If that makes someone upset, oh well you are a finite resource.

[Teirin]

24 minutes ago, Kishi said:

So, might as well just eat well, train hard, and let the body adapt as it will.

 

Exactly so!  You're going to need the performance in the near future :-)

 

[Kishi]

15 minutes ago, Urgan said:

You might be able to, but the more criteria you add to the list that is "all," the more delicate the balancing act. I don't think "can you" is the question we should ponder too hard, it's more like, "do you really want to?" The risk:benefit on that doesn't seem favorable to staying the cut course given that easing up just a smidge on calories (I would dump the extra into carbs and protein for energy + recovery, FWIW) might just allow you to strike the best path for keeping up with all the goals in light of increased demands. This sounds like a performance as much as a training, which demands a certain level of respect and concentration of resources (you know that already, I'm just sayin').

 

Yeah, you're right. And, the truth is... I really don't. Like I said, getting lean is a vanity goal, but at the risk of sounding mopey and full of self-pity, I don't really have anyone to be vain for. Like, if I wanted to be with a pretty girl, I think it's fair to try to work on myself too, you know? But, there's nobody here, so being lean doesn't really serve a purpose. So, I'd really rather just eat a lot of good food, do good quality work, and let the dice fall where they will as far as what my body looks like.

 

(also I ate so many carbs last night. just. so many).

 

23 minutes ago, Urgan said:

Can't be everything to everyone every time. If that makes someone upset, oh well you are a finite resource.

 

Yeah. The biggest obstacle right now is that the facilities for getting rid of the stuff I'm presently wanting to get rid of aren't open around hours that work for my work schedule, and my weekends tend to be booked.

 

7 minutes ago, Teirin said:

 

Exactly so!  You're going to need the performance in the near future :-)

 

 

Right!

[Urgan]

4 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Yeah, you're right. And, the truth is... I really don't. Like I said, getting lean is a vanity goal, but at the risk of sounding mopey and full of self-pity, I don't really have anyone to be vain for. Like, if I wanted to be with a pretty girl, I think it's fair to try to work on myself too, you know? But, there's nobody here, so being lean doesn't really serve a purpose. So, I'd really rather just eat a lot of good food, do good quality work, and let the dice fall where they will as far as what my body looks like.

 

(also I ate so many carbs last night. just. so many).

 

Mainly I just don't want you to die in the pursuit of all things at top speed simultaneously. That would be bad. There is NOTHING inherently wrong or inferior with trying to maintain a certain body fat % any more than one might want to be hyooge if it helps boost your self-confidence into a healthy place. Which does help in the girl-getting biz, funnily enough. Nothing is worse than someone whose sole party trick is self-deprecation. Nothing. Ugh. Do Not Want.

 

You gotta like you, dude. 

 

10 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Yeah. The biggest obstacle right now is that the facilities for getting rid of the stuff I'm presently wanting to get rid of aren't open around hours that work for my work schedule, and my weekends tend to be booked.

 

Just pencil yourself into your friend moving time slot and carry on with your bad self. Sorry to anybody wanting a time slice, you are making your habitat more.....habitable. Ver' important.