How to rebuild a Wolverine

[Endor]

12 hours ago, Lara said:

They've called today saying that past saturday they spent time at a bar having some beers with someone that was confirmed covid positive this morning. They are waiting for their own test.

Oh no does that put you at risk from lunch with them the other day? 

[Waanie]

 

[Lara]

9 hours ago, Endor said:

Oh no does that put you at risk from lunch with them the other day? 

No, it happened two days after they were here. But sincerely, given the way they have behaved, it was just a matter of time.

[Lara]

In-laws update.

I hope this is going to be the last time I talk about this. Tomorrow all travels between regions are forbidden again, so I don't expect we will be seeing them soon.

 

MIL called boyfriend this morning. Test results were negative, but they want to repeat it in a few days just in case. They still wanted to come, but we would meet at the park. Ok. BUT she said they were coming in the morning. I heard boyfriend explain that I had had zero sleep and would need to take a nap in the morning, while the kid took hers with him in the carrier, so it was better if they came in the afternoon as planned. She said "no, we're going now". He insisted, but she repeated they were coming in the morning, he said "but the kid will be asleep, and you will not see Lara", and she said it didn't mind if they didn't see me. On one side I thought it was a bit rude of me to stay in bed and sleep while they were here (today is the day we give and receive christmas gifts), but since they said they didn't mind, well, I chose rest and mental health against date in the park with "we told you she should be sleeping on her own".

It's was the right choice since my boyfriend said they were cranky and scared about the virus, which surprised both of us, since they have not reduced their social life (do you remember that crowded birthday in october?) and specially him has kept on his local bar habits so it was clear it was just a matter of time.

Apparently, FIL was the one behind the schedule change, because coming in the afternoon would make him lose his TV-couch nap after lunch.

MIL asked why had Wolvie slept so poorly, "was she cold, too hot, hungry? There must be something wrong with her because kids her age usually sleep the whole night without waking up".

Gosh, I'm so glad I chose sleeping.

 

In the evening it was boyfriend's brother turn, who phoned. You should be training her to sleep in her crib, you should let her cry, you're too eager to pay her attention, you're being her slave. Note that the guy has no kids of his own and has zero experience with babies, but feels the need to tell us how wrong we are.

*sigh*

[Lara]

6.1

Healthy lunch: salad, roasted broccoli, trout.

No cold water or breathing cycles. 

A thing I enjoy: reading (I received a Philip Ball's book as a gift), DR exercises (not that I enjoy having DR, but doing the exercises is a type of movement and it does me good).

Going out: about 40 minutes walk.

How do I feel meditation: chest pressure, anxiety. 

[Lara]

I'm feeling like an idiot right now. A relieved idiot, but an idiot.

When the first sleep regression began months ago, naps were a mess too, but these last 15 days, naps were ok, and what was worrying me about the nights was, more than the lack of sleep, the fact that every time she woke up, she was anxious.

I was thinking of this yesterday, during Wolvie's after-lunch nap, when I was lying close to her trying to sleep myself. After 45 minutes of her sleep, I watched her arrive to the phase change. She moved a little, wiggled her arms, and did her usual "check": she opens her eyes, looks around and goes back to sleep. Sometimes it looks like she doesn't actually see, other times she directly looks at me or some object in the room, and yesterday she even smiled at me before she peacefully went back to sleep.

In that moment, a little light, ironically, popped in my head: idiooot! You're an idiot! How could you think naps and night sleep were the same thing? Why was she scared at night and not by day? Idiooot, she is just a little baby afraid of the dark, you stupid mommy!

At night I always sleep with a bit of light, so I can see her and check on her at any time, but I didn't ask myself whether that was light enough for her to check on me.

So last night, I left the blind fully up, to allow the light from the streetlights get into the room, and crossed my fingers. She got asleep, I got asleep... and three hours later she woke up to nurse, without any sign of anxiety ? It took her a long while to get back to sleep, but slept for another 2 hours. In the end I got what has been her best pattern until now, 3+2+1+mess, the messy part being calmer than usual ?

It could just be that she had an unexpected good night, but I suspect, and hope, that the problem is solved.

[deftona]

Aw, bless her ❤️ here's hoping you've found a solution! 

[Endor]

12 hours ago, Lara said:

Apparently, FIL was the one behind the schedule change, because coming in the afternoon would make him lose his TV-couch nap after lunch.

What a shithead. At least he's consistent. How old are they? Something seems to happen to people in their 70's where they turn into selfish assholes.

[Endor]

Fingers crossed for sleep solution!

[Lara]

44 minutes ago, Endor said:

What a shithead. At least he's consistent. How old are they? Something seems to happen to people in their 70's where they turn into selfish assholes.

They are around 65. So he starts early...

No, not really. He has always been a selfish asshole.

 

1 hour ago, deftona said:

Aw, bless her ❤️ here's hoping you've found a solution! 

 

43 minutes ago, Endor said:

Fingers crossed for sleep solution!

??????????????????

If this works and she sticks to that sleep pattern, it could totally change my days.

[Lara]

7.1

Cold shower: 1:30. 3 breathing cycles.

Healthy meal: lunch (salad, duck).

Going out: only to buy bread.

A thing I enjoy: listening to music.

How do I feel meditation: worry, fear, self-doubt. 

[Endor]

5 hours ago, Lara said:

buy bread

How the bread going?  I seem to remember you having problems sometimes with eating bread? 

[Lara]

On 1/8/2021 at 7:40 AM, Endor said:

How the bread going?  I seem to remember you having problems sometimes with eating bread? 

Yeah, it still gives me trouble, and I keep eating it everyday pretending I don't know. Without sleep my willpower vanishes, so I'm gulping plenty of things that are harmful for my body, also because apparently sleep deprived bodies only want moooarr carbs. I'm trying to redirect the situation but I'm doing it very slowly otherwise I may end up burnt.

Good point is that I've found this sourdough bread bakery in town —that type of bread causes me less trouble— only that I'm suspecting it's not real sourdough but "with sourdough".

[Lara]

Does anybody know if diastasis recti can heal on its own? I don't seem to be able to feel the gap anymore, and it's obvious it didn't heal because I did a few exercises thrice.

 

8.1

No cold water but cold exposure during walk. 4 breathing cycles.

Healthy meal: afternoon snack (bowl of strawberries and kiwis shared with Wolvie).

Going out: walked for about 15 minutes while it snowed. 

A thing I enjoy: watching the snow fall. Some DR friendly yoga. 

How do I feel meditation: chest pressure, calm. 

 

9.1

Cold shower 1:30. 4 breathing cycles.

Healthy meal: lunch (salad, sweet potato, grilled salmon). 

A thing I enjoy: movement! I've done some FRC mobility (neck, shoulders, thorax, elbows, wrists). 

Going out: nope. It's still snowing and awfully windy. 

How do I feel meditation: lonely, sad, exhausted. 

 

10.1

No cold shower. No breathing cycles.

Healthy meals: breakfast, lunch, dinner.

Going out: about 40 minutes in the snow.

A thing I enjoy: listening to music.

How do I feel meditation: fear, thrill.

[KB Girl]

On 1/7/2021 at 8:04 AM, Lara said:

It could just be that she had an unexpected good night, but I suspect, and hope, that the problem is solved.

Still going well? It's also so cute isn't it.. mine also does the check (I can't sleep with any light, but she feels around for me). 

 

On 1/8/2021 at 11:24 AM, Lara said:

Does anybody know if diastasis recti can heal on its own? I don't seem to be able to feel the gap anymore, and it's obvious it didn't heal because I did a few exercises thrice.

 

Yes actually, that's what is supposed to happen. When it doesn't its often because the person is doing something to prevent it from healing*- usually the way they stand, lift things, brace themselves etc. You've been mindful about that even during pregnancy, so.. it's not that it went away magically, you provided the right circumstances for it to heal. 

 

(*that sounds really mean like a DR is always someones own fault or something- it's not, if you don't know about it.. and also the linea alba can overstretch during pregnancy and then you simply can't fix it no matter what you do)

[Lara]

6 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Still going well? It's also so cute isn't it.. mine also does the check (I can't sleep with any light, but she feels around for me). 

She has good and bad nights, but at least the anxious part is gone.

About the so many wake ups, I've also been told it could be separation anxiety, which would be a bit too soon for her I think, but since every developmental "crisis" she's gone through has always arrived a month earlier than expected, who knows.

 

6 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Yes actually, that's what is supposed to happen. When it doesn't its often because the person is doing something to prevent it from healing*- usually the way they stand, lift things, brace themselves etc. You've been mindful about that even during pregnancy, so.. it's not that it went away magically, you provided the right circumstances for it to heal. 

 

(*that sounds really mean like a DR is always someones own fault or something- it's not, if you don't know about it.. and also the linea alba can overstretch during pregnancy and then you simply can't fix it no matter what you do)

This reassures me, thank you. I didn't know it could heal without the tedious exercises ?. Last night, anyway, I spent some time trying to find the gap, and it seems there is still a slight incline. Nothing to do with a couple of weeks ago, when half the tip of my index and middle finger could fit in.

I feel relieved about this. I thought it would take forever to heal it on my own and that it would hinder my way back to fitness.

I'm thinking that anyway it could be a good idea to visit a physio or osteopath, to check all the area, since I have some weird sensations sometimes in my lower pelvis and I've also experiencing feet soreness the day after I've been walking for more than one hour. It started on my eighth month of pregnancy and is still happening. I guess it's all related.

[Lara]

11.1

Forgot to track.

I know I didn't do the WH things, didn't meditate, and I think I stayed home the whole day. Yes, I'm not sure about what happens each day, that's what lack of sleep does to me.

I neither remember what we ate. I try to, but the things that come to mind are from a couple of days ago. I think dinner was healthy (rice with things, and Wolvie's squash purée ?).

 

Decided to invest in some nice hi-fi headphones (I've been postponing that purchase forever) that will only arrive next week because snow, and will probably try to find a preowned prayer with dac function. Definitely worth it now that I spend endless hours in bed awake every night.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

1 hour ago, Lara said:

and will probably try to find a preowned prayer with dac function.

As an ordained minister I can assure you prayer is free  

[Lara]

15 minutes ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

As an ordained minister I can assure you prayer is free  

And amplified through a digital converter!! ??

At least this time I didn't make any awful grammar mistakes —I hope ? (I know

@Endor combs my messages with his tiquismiquis detector)

[Endor]

21 minutes ago, Lara said:

tiquismiquis

What a great word!

 

Ask and ye shall receive...

 

2 hours ago, Lara said:

I neither remember

Neither do I remember

 

2 hours ago, Lara said:

that will only arrive next week because snow

that won't arrive until next week because of the snow

 

2 hours ago, Lara said:

a preowned prayer with dac function.

Umm...or should i say Ommmmm or maybe Ohmmmm!

 

P.S. Here's a very lame joke you reminded me of:

A lorry full of wigs was stolen from a factory nearby yesterday, police are combing the area!

 

P.P.S . I'm impressed you can write at all after so little sleep, never mind in a foreign language.  As i hope you know,  your written English is at a high level, however I'm sure you rue the day you asked for corrections,  you might not even recall doing so after so many years!

[KB Girl]

20 hours ago, Lara said:

She has good and bad nights, but at least the anxious part is gone.

About the so many wake ups, I've also been told it could be separation anxiety, which would be a bit too soon for her I think, but since every developmental "crisis" she's gone through has always arrived a month earlier than expected, who knows.

 

This reassures me, thank you. I didn't know it could heal without the tedious exercises ?. Last night, anyway, I spent some time trying to find the gap, and it seems there is still a slight incline. Nothing to do with a couple of weeks ago, when half the tip of my index and middle finger could fit in.

I feel relieved about this. I thought it would take forever to heal it on my own and that it would hinder my way back to fitness.

I'm thinking that anyway it could be a good idea to visit a physio or osteopath, to check all the area, since I have some weird sensations sometimes in my lower pelvis and I've also experiencing feet soreness the day after I've been walking for more than one hour. It started on my eighth month of pregnancy and is still happening. I guess it's all related.

Always a good idea to check in with a physio that specialises in the pelvic floor. Sore feet that started in pregnancy are most likely feet arches flattening out a bit, there are exercises for that- since you can stop doing the tedious DR ones  

[Lara]

38 minutes ago, Endor said:

I'm impressed you can write at all after so little sleep, never mind in a foreign language

I'm aware that my english has worsened these last months, but given that there are days I have problems even with my own language, I'm ok with it.

 

39 minutes ago, Endor said:

Here's a very lame joke you reminded me of:

A lorry full of wigs was stolen from a factory nearby yesterday, police are combing the area!

That is a terrible, terrible joke. Even for you ?

 

26 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

Sore feet that started in pregnancy are most likely feet arches flattening out a bit, there are exercises for that- since you can stop doing the tedious DR ones  

I'm sure they will be almost as tedious as DR ones ?

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Lara, I didn't know you weren't a native English Speaker till you said something about being from Spain.

 

 

[Lara]

2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Lara, I didn't know you weren't a native English Speaker till you said something about being from Spain.

I'm having a déjà-vu. We had this conversation once and it ended, as always, with @WhiteGhost saying disturbing things about paella. 

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

1 hour ago, Lara said:

I'm having a déjà-vu. We had this conversation once and it ended, as always, with @WhiteGhost saying disturbing things about paella. 

For context, he did this show in Barcelona.