De-Stress Techniques/Advice

[ttuesday]

I've struggled with stress for a while now - being a student living on my own, working two jobs, juggling social life, boyfriend, and being physically active. Sometimes I handle it well, other times I just lose it. I've tried trying not to worry, but it's what I do! Taking my dog for a walk helps, or going to kickboxing and beating the crap out of the bags/dummies, but there is still all the times where I can't manage this, like getting my brain to shut off at night or focuses on working instead of worrying.

 

I'm just wondering if anyone has any advice for de-stressing, or techniques that you have found that works for you. I've tried meditating, or guided meditation at night, but my brain can't focus on it long enough for it to work. Listening to music seems to cut it out for the most part, but it's like a band-aid - a temporary fix. And like I said, taking my dog for a walk helps, but I can't be permanently on a walk because things need to get done! (I also make a lot of excuses, mind you, I'm working on eradicating that habit as well!)

 

So yeah, stressed out student calling for help!

[Faervel17]

I definitely need this. I find yoga helps for me but its hard doing it via youtube videos all the time. 

[Maria]

Tip 1: Take out anything in your life not absolutely necessary for your well being. Make more time. Say no. If at all possible, cut down a little on work. Plan free time, don't waste it on stuff that don't give anything back.

Tip 2: Micro breaks. Read up on it and you will see how beneficial it is. It makes you more effective, even if it means working less. Find something that works for you, but since you are interested in meditation I would suggest mindfulness meditation. 2 min of that every hour or half hour and you can conquer almost everything!

Tip 3: Write down Everything at the end of the day, especially your plan for the next day. Keep the pad by your bed, so you can scribble away anything that comes to mind while trying to sleep. If you worry much, do a written dialogue with yourself. Pushing thoughts away doesn't work. Accept them and then either let them float away or deal with them. Easier said then done, maybe. Let every day take care of it own problems, you don't need to manage several weeks in one day, even if it is only in your head.

Try different strategies and find what works for you. N=1 in this experiment.

[ceethegreat]

^^^ Agree with everything Maria said, especially removing things that don't add to your life.

 

See if there are ways to streamline your activities -- do physically active activities with your friends and/or boyfriend to kill 2 or 3 birds withone stone. And there's nothing wrong with saying No to people when you need time for yourself to decompress. Also, what are the things that worry you? List them. List things you can do to help the issues. As I get older I realize it's totally okay (and absoltuely necessary) to take time for myself or I'm going to go batty. It's harder to schedule stuff, more outside obstacles to think about. I have to take the time to take care of me if I want to be able to face the rest head on.

[Gilfren]

I can speak to the work side and maybe it can translate a little for your situation... but particularly with work, as soon as my foot hits the pavement outside the office door, work is not allowed on my plate. At first I had to remind myself that I'm home now, work is over.. but now it's almost subconscious... or Pavlovian (sp?).. when I get outside, work immediately leaves.

 

I guess you could call it compartmentalization... start with one topic at a time and try to "tuck it away"

 

I hear you on the excersize portion too... when I'm at a structured, scheduled hour of a group workout... its like my mortgage and my laundry disappear.

[ttuesday]

Thanks for all the helpful tips everyone. I'm going to test out some of the strategies and see if any of them work. The first one being cutting out things in my life that worry me that really shouldn't. I have my head so far ahead in the future that sometimes I forget to live in the 'now'. It's been something I've been working on, trying to live 'one day at a time' rather than two years down the road, haha.

 

And also, applying micro breaks to my life. I advocate micro breaks to my students when I'm working with them, but I always thought that it would never work for me. I guess I should be practicing what I preach for once, haha. I'm also going to try and do yoga once a week and see if that helps at all. I really enjoy it, but of course, I never have time, haha.

 

I think #1 stress is work and bringing it home with me. I need to definitely work on leaving it at work and not worrying about it all the other days of the week.

[busterswordassassin]

From someone who was once really stressed out every minute of my life to someone who is according to his friends one of the calmest people they know I can tell you that the way to go is to not just have 3 or 4 coping skills but to have at least 10 coping skills like for instance when I used to be stressed out back in the day my coping skills where sleeping video games and movies now they are video games, drawing, movies, playing sports, painting, watching t.v., walking, playing cards, listening to music, going on the internet. And the list goes on and on and on. Now when sleeping , playing video games , and movies fail I have a ton of other options to help me keep calm. So that if the three options fail I don't get stressed out because I feel like I'm in a corner and another thing I wouldn't recoment beating a bag senseless is a reliable coping skill yes you may relief stress while you are meeting it up and you might be tired after doing so but it will most likely cause you to subconsisally shift your stress towards the bag and cause you to be even more stressed out. For example instead of thinking about stress as something that can be wiped away or replaced on one side think of it in terms of how an old fashioned balence works and let's say that we have black waights (stress) and white waights coping skills)

[busterswordassassin]

From someone who was once really stressed out every minute of my life to someone who is according to his friends one of the calmest people they know I can tell you that the way to go is to not just have 3 or 4 coping skills but to have at least 10 coping skills like for instance when I used to be stressed out back in the day my coping skills where sleeping video games and movies now they are video games, drawing, movies, playing sports, painting, watching t.v., walking, playing cards, listening to music, going on the internet. And the list goes on and on and on. Now when sleeping , playing video games , and movies fail I have a ton of other options to help me keep calm. So that if the three options fail I don't get stressed out because I feel like I'm in a corner and another thing I wouldn't recoment beating a bag senseless is a reliable coping skill yes you may relief stress while you are meeting it up and you might be tired after doing so but it will most likely cause you to subconsisally shift your stress towards the bag and cause you to be even more stressed out. For example instead of thinking about stress as something that can be wiped away or replaced on one side think of it in terms of how an old fashioned balence works and let's say that we have black waights (stress) and white waights (coping skills) and let's say each black waight equals 1lbs and each wight waights eaquals 1lbs and let's say that you just got yelled at by your boss which equals one black waight on the stress side OK you could let it slide and let it build up but then by the end of the day when you explode but that would be bad or you could walk back to your desk and cover your ears and take 25 deal breaths which would be a form of meditation to get your mind off it and would equal one white wiaght and would even it out but let's say you sat there and covered your ears and took deep breaths the whole day long then you'd probably be fired for not working and you don't want that rather so the point is keep the ballence even as much as possible and have multiple coping skills because sometimes you aren't able to do sertain coping skills so if I where you I'd not only have on set of coping skills but have at least ten for work and ten for liesure. OK well I hope this has helped you out. If you need anymore help or if you need any suggestions of coping skills just let me know. OK =p

[brake]

I've struggled with stress for a while now - being a student living on my own, working two jobs, juggling social life, boyfriend, and being physically active. Sometimes I handle it well, other times I just lose it. I've tried trying not to worry, but it's what I do! Taking my dog for a walk helps, or going to kickboxing and beating the crap out of the bags/dummies, but there is still all the times where I can't manage this, like getting my brain to shut off at night or focuses on working instead of worrying.

I'm just wondering if anyone has any advice for de-stressing, or techniques that you have found that works for you. I've tried meditating, or guided meditation at night, but my brain can't focus on it long enough for it to work. Listening to music seems to cut it out for the most part, but it's like a band-aid - a temporary fix. And like I said, taking my dog for a walk helps, but I can't be permanently on a walk because things need to get done! (I also make a lot of excuses, mind you, I'm working on eradicating that habit as well!)

So yeah, stressed out student calling for help!

I'd take some tests to see if you're experiencing normal stress, or have an anxiety disorder acting up as a result of life stress. In either case, your first step is to simplify. Declutter your house and workspace, condense your to-do lists- make a single system that keeps track of everything- a planner or even notes in an iPhone or notebook.

Try to work on being present in the moment during work or anything else that is stressful. When you're very busy, often the source of stress is thinking about all the things you need to do in the near future, which is a seemingly endless list of things.

Stay present. Simplify. Give yourself time and space to relax and recharge. If you still feel this way, cross check your feelings with symptoms of an anxiety disorder.

Last year, I was in a very similar situation, and thought: "Hey, why all the stress? When did my life become so overloaded- this is unbearable." A year later, after realizing I had an anxiety disorder that flared up because of the demanding situation I'm medicated, in therapy, getting happier, fitter, more productive (ala Radiohead) and get along much better with my significant other.

Either way, best of luck to you, and check out Zen Habits! (a productivity/zen/de-stress blog)

[Rurik Harrgath]

Lots of great ideas here already.  But here's my unorthodox method: mindful awareness set to metal music is my moment of zen. 

 

Block everything else out and focus on the lyrics or rhythm of the music.  Eyes closed, and let the peace (or rage, depending on your poison) flow through you.

 

I tell you, the Jedi were on to something with this whole 'meditation' thing.  I just prefer to supplement mine with the healing power of music!