Men ONLY please...

[leadchipmunk]

especially when i see all thes other dudes at the gym or in wrestling or even at a restaurant looking all awesome. All this has lead me to question my ability to improve lately which is really sort of eating at me on the inside a bit. And I have noticed that this insecurity with how I look compared to some other "more manly" guys is starting to effect my desire to train (which should never happen!). So i'd like to ask you guys how you deal with your insecurity when comparing how you look to other guys? do you even? Is it just me (i know it isnt)?

What is an acceptable way to deal with this without getting frustrated and wanting to give up?

I do the same exact thing you do. I look at other more fit people and my insecurities come out and tell me that I'll never be able to do that, and that I'll always look like a fat slob, and so on. I guess the best you can do is punch your insecurities in the face and yell back at it saying "I can do this, I will do this and I'll look better than those guys!" It is even more motivating when you do it out loud, though it may start a fight depending on the guys. You could work that to you advantage and get some cardio and strength training depending on if you choose fight or flight.

The chicken leg thing works too, it would let you see a negative in them that you may see you have an up on them somewhere. Hell, those guys are probably looking at you and seeing things that you have that they don't but want.

--Edit-- Whoah, got caught up actually working at work and missed a lot. So, I may be a little late to this conversation and 3 topics behind.

[WizardTrip]

[ATTACH=CONFIG]2740[/ATTACH]

Cheer up!

YES! I love it!!

[Guest Snake McClain]

A big part of it might just be the way you train, Bruce. From what I've seen of your logs, etc over the past year or so, you seem to be training for strength, which is great, but doesn't necessarily mean you're going to develop a more defined chest. If appearance is important to you (and I can totally understand, especially in your line of work, that it would be), then maybe it might be worth supplementing your training with some more body-building style exercises specifically for this purpose. As to what these exercises are, I'm not sure, but chest definition seems to be one of the main goals in this arena, so it may be worth a look?

I tried that by doing incline bench presses...which actually added strength to me. i didn't touch a flat bench for a couple months. doing incline only and then i went back to flat bench last week and jumped 35lbs on my max working set. was cool...anyway i kept reading that incline bench causes the upper part of the pec to build and i kept at it and kept at it but still no real development there. I dunno. like if you look at me from a sideview its like my pecs are more like boobs. lol just not soft.

[ATTACH=CONFIG]2740[/ATTACH]

Cheer up!

Thanks Airen. Love the photo! lol. is that supposed to be me? if so I'm making that one my avatar.

I do the same exact thing you do. I look at other more fit people and my insecurities come out and tell me that I'll never be able to do that, and that I'll always look like a fat slob, and so on. I guess the best you can do is punch your insecurities in the face and yell back at it saying "I can do this, I will do this and I'll look better than those guys!" It is even more motivating when you do it out loud, though it may start a fight depending on the guys. You could work that to you advantage and get some cardio and strength training depending on if you choose fight or flight.

The chicken leg thing works too, it would let you see a negative in them that you may see you have an up on them somewhere. Hell, those guys are probably looking at you and seeing things that you have that they don't but want.

--Edit-- Whoah, got caught up actually working at work and missed a lot. So, I may be a little late to this conversation and 3 topics behind.

LOL'd at "You could work that to your advantage and get some cardio and strength training depending on if you choose to fight or flight."

It hadn't occurred to me that someone may look at me the same as i do others. at least i have some leg power (some).

[WizardTrip]

It isn't that i want to quit or give up because of how they look. but it's because I can't seem to get there. it's just really frustrating. Like...i've never been the best at anything and i want to feel like i'm the best at this for me. I know that's ridiculous and i can't explain it but..you're right. I've seen changes. definitely. but I just sort of thought things would be different by now. Half a year has passed and Although progress has been made I feel like it isn't enough. Like...realistically i see the progress others have made in the same amount of time and theirs trumps mine in spades.

Like there is some secret I can't find the answer to that is keeping me from having exactly what I'm looking for.

To me, half a year isn't all that much time, but your current goals are different than mine. I'm losing while building strength and muscle which brings completely different hurdles. Once I reach that appearance goal of mine for weight loss will be when I put my focus on a muscular appearance, so I can't really say what works and what doesn't in that regard.

Curious....if you don't mind me asking what was that comment that the lady friend made?

Don't mind at all, but since it's a bit embarrassing and stupid, I wrote it up in a PM to you.

And i know that I'm sort of a "pretty boy" but i'm not metro (except maybe with my hair). So i'm with you there.

Honestly, there are parts of me that can easily be considered "metro" too, so I guess my main point was the stereotypical douche bag kind.

i wish i could grow a rockin beard and pull off the look some of the more rugged types do.

Me too......me too!!!!

[Thrillho]

Rugged:

[Swinging_Jarnbjorn]

From some of the news stories last year I didn't know that teachers actually waited until the students graduated. I vaguely remember at least 3 stories about high school teachers nailing their students. (I think one of them was even kinda hot).

We had one of those stories hit in my tiny little town. The teacher ia a little younger than I am, like maybe 28 or 30, and she goes and nails this dude just before his 18th birthday. DUMB! She's now known as the "HEAD TEACHER"

[Guest Snake McClain]

To me, half a year isn't all that much time, but your current goals are different than mine. I'm losing while building strength and muscle which brings completely different hurdles. Once I reach that appearance goal of mine for weight loss will be when I put my focus on a muscular appearance, so I can't really say what works and what doesn't in that regard.

Don't mind at all, but since it's a bit embarrassing and stupid, I wrote it up in a PM to you.

Me too......me too!!!!

I agree. half a year isn't that long. but i only have a half year left to be really well on my way. i have a small timeline of success (due to my age) so i have to get on right away.

and i will read said message.

and yes. beards. we should get some hair implants for our faces.

Rugged:

although i don't get what this means...it still made me laugh.

[airen123]

[quote

Thanks Airen. Love the photo! lol. is that supposed to be me? if so I'm making that one my avatar.

QUOTE]

No one in particular, but I guess it does look like you! Anyone is welcome to use it as avi. Just saw several other drawings and wanted to attempt my version. :exits men only:

[Guest Snake McClain]

[quote

Thanks Airen. Love the photo! lol. is that supposed to be me? if so I'm making that one my avatar.

QUOTE]

No one in particular, but I guess it does look like you! Anyone is welcome to use it as avi. Just saw several other drawings and wanted to attempt my version. :exits men only:

Rock on. Thanks for swinging by. lol

[The Tin Man]

Rugged:

Is that your way of announcing another baby Thrillho is on the way or is it from earlier?

[Thrillho]

It's the "Welfare Benefit Report". No No No Yes No. It's sort of a Canadian joke. My wife baked me a cake between the time I told her I got laid off from work and me actually getting home.

Also, I have SO MUCH MORE BEARD right now. I should take an updated pic.

[Artinum]

I tried a beard. It didn't look too bad, but I couldn't be bothered to maintain it. Clean shaven is easier (fading to stubble between shaves).

[leadchipmunk]

Maintain a beard? What is this nonsense you speak of?

[Namednoname]

Beards are win. And recently i've noticed that Epic Moustaches seem to be directly correlated to strength. Time for a change?

[Guest Snake McClain]

Beards are win. And recently i've noticed that Epic Moustaches seem to be directly correlated to strength. Time for a change?

I could do a stash. I just shouldn't because of wrestling. It might look a bit odd and not go with my character.

[Red1263]

Snake/Bruce, you can't let that get to you, I'm sorta lucky, in the sense that I'm surrounded by people who don't exercise in the least, so I've gained a bit of perspective on that, I think that's what you need, remember that "no matter how good you are, there'll always be someone better" That's a 2-way street thought, "No matter how bad you get, there's always someone who did worse!"

Btw, I thought you had those desired pecs when you posted your "pink bikini" avi. Heh, I had wished I had pecs like yours, but then I grew a goatee, so I'm good.

[leadchipmunk]

I say just quit shaving, that way you have the epic manliness of the beard and that comes along with the all powerful moustache.

[Guest Snake McClain]

Snake/Bruce, you can't let that get to you, I'm sorta lucky, in the sense that I'm surrounded by people who don't exercise in the least, so I've gained a bit of perspective on that, I think that's what you need, remember that "no matter how good you are, there'll always be someone better" That's a 2-way street thought, "No matter how bad you get, there's always someone who did worse!"

Btw, I thought you had those desired pecs when you posted your "pink bikini" avi. Heh, I had wished I had pecs like yours, but then I grew a goatee, so I'm good.

Hahahahaha HAHA well the "pink bikini" was me celebrating my birthday ass beating. Lol. Not celebrating mymy pecs to anyone.

[wildross]

I think we men have as many body image issues as the women...just different pieces. For instance, I think I have skinny arms. Obviously I don't, or if I do, they are really strong given the bench press numbers. I have to ask for the "large" cuff for blood pressure (the one they use on fat people) because of the size of my biceps. But when I look at my arms, they look skinny to me.

I've resigned myself to never having bulging muscles... My little brother on the other hand (IMO) probably looks more 'cut' now than I do and he hasn't lifted a weight (other than farming) in 30 years. He always looked tight. And I have no idea what he thinks he looks like.

[Pat G]

Good point Wildross or maybe you're just long sighted....

[Red1263]

Good point Wildross or maybe you're just long sighted....

I'm going to have to agree with Pat here, Ross, based on your shoulders, I can guess that you have big arms, whereas a guy like me who's had skinny arms all his life, can make that complaint.

[Pat G]

Ross, based on your shoulders...

lol.

based on his numbers... and the way he looks muscle bound in his form check vids

[BruteSquad]

Oh my senior pyschology and sociology teacher (same lady) was super hot. She was single too and i swear (so did one of my friends) she was flirting with me in class. But that could have just been my teenage fantasy. lol

Hey, if it is your fantasy, you can tell it any way you want.

[rtalencar]

Haven't read through this whole thing yet. While my drive doesn't change based on fitness (or at least hasn't yet), how much she enjoys it increases pretty substantially with it.

My fiancee hates it when I tell people that deadlifts and squats are the reason she said yes, but I think it's true.

[Hannibal]

I could do a stash. I just shouldn't because of wrestling. It might look a bit odd and not go with my character.

Yeah, I don't think a 'stache would go well with the Eddie Edwards hair style you're rocking in your avatar pic. But if you're still going to go for the Snake Plisken character, a beard would be acceptable, 5 o'clock shadow a must.

I tried a beard. It didn't look too bad, but I couldn't be bothered to maintain it. Clean shaven is easier (fading to stubble between shaves).

Not a whole lot of maintenance goes into it. Once a week trim up the edges, and every two or three months give it a trim. Way less work than shaving daily! If you mean that it's hard to get past the itchy phase, it just takes time. That part put me off my first beard. But once you get there, it's not itchy anymore.