n00B looking for advice on just about anything

[DAVEOSAURUS REX]

Well, thank you stopping by. Pull up a chair. Can I take your coat for you? There we go. Comfy? Good. Can I get you a snack or beverage? Okay. Look, let me get straight to the point. I know you are all wondering why I gathered you all here, on this, the most of auspicious of days. Well, I need your help, kind strangers, whomever you may be. I just need some advice on where to begin with all this. Let me tell you a bit about myself.

I'm 33, deeply in debt, and very unhappy with the way my life turned out. It's a mess. I work 2 jobs that I despise so that I can barely make ends meet. I do exercise at least twice a week, but since I smoke and don't eat properly, it doesn't really show. Yes, I'm well aware I should just quit smoking, so don't bother pointing that out. I started on here roughly 15 minutes ago, and just want to ask for pointers and starting points here. It would be greatly appreciated.

[Hermione Gainser]

These snacks are tasty, thanks!

Now, done to business. First: LOLZ at your name. Love it! Okay.. now really down to business. Sounds like you are very aware of areas in need of improvement. Good. Take those, make goals related (such as: quit smoking, workout 4 days/wk, stop eating junk food, etc). Start small. Take one thing. Diet is going to be 80% of your success. So, start keeping track of what you eat. Do it for a week or two to see how it really looks (you may think you know..) then pick one thing that seems to be a problem and work to change it. Maybe you eat too much and you need to dial it back. Start there. Then start replacing foods that don't support your goals with foods that do. Each step will lead you to the next step.

I say, join our challenge (if you haven't already). Here are the rules.

It's a good way to get encouragement, input and ideas on ways to improve the areas of your life you don't like.

Welcome to the community!

[JPanda]

What's your schedule look like? When I made the decision to change my lifestyle I did every little thing I could to make a difference. Parking at the end of the lot and walking those extra steps to work. Giving yourself a set schedule for sleeping so that it was regulated and I got plenty of it. Eating the "right" things (basically cut down on sugar / processed foods).

Once you start making baby steps, they turn into regular steps; then those steps turn into strides, then leaps, then bounds.

If you feel like you don't have time for a lot of those things than prove it. Audit your time, keep track of every little thing you do each day, and how long you do them. You'll find that time probably isn't the issue.

[ebm1224]

welcome welcome welcome! laura pretty much hit everything i was going to say so i won't reiterate.

i think alot of the time when you're starting off you want to do things "just right." the fact is that there is no perfect plan...there's just you trying to make better decisions today than you did yesterday. so don't worry about "where do i start?"...just start. pick 3 things...could be simple stuff like only drink 1 soda a day or get 5 servings of fruits and veggies. or it could be something harder like quitting smoking. there's lots of advice and encouragement to be had but only YOU know what you want out of life.

glad you're here!

[Ryan Sannar]

Use us.

We are honestly, seriously, completely here to help. Because that's what the community has done for us. Even if you stop working out, or you get sick or your struggling or your not. Keep up on the forums.

So track your diet for a week. Along with any physical activity. I'd also suggest putting "I know cigarettes are bad, don't bug me about them." in your signature.

Try to decide on your goals. Steve has a great post that came out a while ago about what character class you are. Anyone want to link it? I can't find it.

[So Late So Soon]

Glad you found the site and Welcome

Life's hard sometimes, but if you truly want to change your life you can. Everyone on this site wants to see you succeed so if you ever need anything don't be afraid to ask.

[Morrigainz]

Ditto what all these guys said! A warm and hearty salutation to you. And yes, thanks for the snacks *om nom nom nom nom*

Also...I know what it's like to be unhappy with your life. A few years ago I was bouncing around from dead end job to dead end job, no degree, with a guy who had less than 0 ambition in his own life...so it was hard to stay motivated about anything. I was also deeply in debt with no way to get out of it.

Eventually I hit rock bottom..and it sucked. But now, 5 years later, I am almost finished with my degree, married to a great (if at times infuriating) guy, able to save money and travel. I feel better about myself now than I ever have in my adult life.

With that being said...there is always hope. If you don't like the way your life is now, then change it. You DO have the power, especially with all the awesome people here. You don't have to think about how unhappy you are with how your life "turned out;" instead think about the changes you want to make in your journey.

Good luck to you and welcome. Always feel free to come here for advice...or support...or whatever. I've found more caring people here in the last 2 months than I have in...well, a long time.

[WizardTrip]

I want to address the "deeply in debt" part. I am 32 and also have my fair share of debt. It is one of my life goals to get out of, and my current plan is to be rid of it by the end of 2013. As it stands, I'm on track. With that said, there were many things I had to change.

Since you are well aware of the need to quit smoking, I will assume you are more than aware of the money being spent on it. I know you said don't point it out, but the only reason I am is I had to face a similar financial strain when it came to alcohol consumption. Before I decided I needed to get out of debt, I was hitting 3-4 happy hours a week, closing down bars every Friday and Saturday night, and having a lot of fun in the overly expensive club scene. I won't even go into how much I was actually spending on alcohol and alcohol related activities a month, but let's just say....A LOT! This was the first thing that had to go. It was not (and still is not) easy because that was a lifestyle I chose because I enjoyed it. I still go out to bars, clubs, and happy hours, but on a much much smaller scale than before (probably 20-30% of what I did before).

Also, you need to have a plan. You need to know which part of your debt you need to tackle first, second, last, etc. I chose to start small.....get rid of the smaller debts first. This has given me the feeling of accomplishment. If I aimed for the largest one first, I wouldn't get that sense of accomplishment for over a year. I then move that payment on to the next piece of debt. That way, my cash output remains the same, but that next debt is being chopped down even faster. Again, you need a plan, written down with very specific details. You will come across periods where you may need to pay for something unexpectedly. When this happens, just accept it, adjust your plan out by that extra month or 2 and continue.

I saw others addressing the eating, exercising, etc, but since debt free is a huge goal for me, I wanted to share some thoughts.

[DAVEOSAURUS REX]

Thanks guys. Once I settle in and make that level up list...... thingie, I'll put quitting smoking at level 2, drastically cutting back at one. I don't really have to cut back on snacking, I actually need to eat more. That's one of the reasons I'm so sluggish is because I don't eat enough.

[DAVEOSAURUS REX]

Love the picture. I don't want to bench press so much as just one punch knockout one. I'll start small with koalas and work my way up to grizlar bears.

[Hermione Gainser]

Love the picture. I don't want to bench press so much as just one punch knockout one. I'll start small with koalas and work my way up to grizlar bears.

Ha!Thanks! I need to update it somehow.. we've decided to go for Wookies! I think grizzly bears may weigh more than wookies, though..

[DAVEOSAURUS REX]

Be careful, Wookies tend to rip peoples arms out of their sockets when upset.

[morethanjustamom]

I second the financial advice and would add that I added a financial goal to my 6 week challenge...$1,000 emergency fund in the bank by the end of the challenge.

Just having a little extra set aside for a blown tire or an unexpected ER visit can help you (or me!) sleep better at night. That's my first step to being debt free, anyway.

[Hermione Gainser]

Be careful, Wookies tend to rip peoples arms out of their sockets when upset.

Oh. I should probably add to my signature that I am the Wookie Whisperer. They always play nice when for me