Cyberdildonics

Feeling really good. Hit the gym a bit yesterday against doctor's orders but I feel amazing today. Did 1/2bw assisted pullups and kneeling pushups in 12,10,8,6,4,2 rep sets, and ran a km in a little over 6min. Ran 2km Tuesday in 13m20s. I'm awesome. Everything's awesome. Physio again tonight. I expect a lecture. Back on the bike from the weekend though I expect! Yesssss!

That insurance medical was brilliant.

Lot of work done on my shoulder last night at physio, so that feels much better, but can't say the same for my rib which is currently LIVID. Stretching and rolling and nsaids etc for the next couple of days, then Monday hopefully she can fix that too.

Yeah, I met a kamikaze pedestrian once, shortly thereafter my tailbone met tarmac. 0/10 would not recommend. A lot of drivers are generally considerate; you get the odd prick, but my main issue tends to be with the ones who drive around at rush hour with their eyes shut. Every single accident I've had involved people just not looking. Annoying, but now I have 6 lights on my white bike and two cameras so *crosses fingers*

Went private. Physio appointment booked. "For when?" I hear you cry! Tonight. Boom.

I give up. Ringing the BUPA people today. If I can't start exercising again then I'm going to go on a killing spree.

It started from being run over, slipping on the stairs just made it worse when I was in the middle of recovering. There's no real rhyme or reason to it, just now sometimes it flares up for no reason. Back to eating naproxen and paracetamol like candy and praying for death. Rage.

Newsflash: My ribs feel like shit and I'm really angry. More at 11.

Won't survive mine either atm. I'm mad at it.

You wanna come take it out on my car?

The Gordon Ramsay recipe-fest continues (with a pizza break) although there was an incident on Weds involving some mini flapjack bites, however I think I was justified in that decision. Went to the gym to do "a quick 5 min on the treadmill, then stretch and foamroll this shoulder" quote unquote. Started my quick 5 min on the treadmill. 25 minutes later I got back off the treadmill having run 3.16km. Oops. On the plus side, after that and all the stretching etc my shoulder and ribs still feel pretty good, although a little tight, so fingers crossed I can start easing back into stuff again. Probably start with running next week and then ease biking back in after (logic: if I'm treadmill running and my ribs hurt I can literally just stop. Cycling? Not so much)

The great not-sulk eating agenda is going well so far, but I am only two days in. So far I've eaten nothing but recipes out of my Gordon Ramsay cookbook, which is quite impressive. My shoulder and ribs are starting to feel better (still driving) but now just feel hella tight instead of sore, so I'm tempted to have a crack at the foam roller today. Will see how it goes Fingers crossed.

Lied about shoulder. Was so bad on Friday I abandoned the bike at work and rode the bus(es) home. Been driving to work so far this week, much to my dismay, but my shoulder is slowly starting to feel better, so we'll see what happens. Maybe I'll make March the month where I stop sulk-eating again.

Turns out when I did that little slip on the stairs and grabbed out for the banister I aggravated the sprain in my intercostal muscles sooo I've been doped off my nipples for, like, 5 straight days. Fortunately I found some stretches for it at the weekend and it feels a little less shit today, so I'm no longer classified as "probably dying" Still out w/r/t bouldering. Week 2 that I'm not making ladies night, but it's better to rest it than make it worse. Running's out as well due to the a/ motion of upper body and b/ the fact that inhaling actually really hurts. Sundae: Grats on the 2000 posts. Have a hi5: o/ Also look at this it's cute: Funny how times change. Bedbound at 14; training to do a double Tough Mudder and a 330 mile bike ride in the same month at 29. Hard old road.

Warning: Gordon Ramsay style swear fest alert. This fucking week is an absolute and proper cunt and can fuck right off back to the arsehole of fucking hades where it came from. Sunday: Shut hand in latch of shitty chest freezer. Cut finger so badly it refused to stop bleeding unless bound for two straight days. Monday: Fucked my hand up like a twat Tuesday: Fucking A&E for my fucking fucked up hand. Fell down the stairs at work and hurt my fucking arse. Wednesday: The godfucking washing machine broke down at late-as-balls o'clock with my fucking winter bike gear in it. BF decided that it didn't constitute a problem important enough to wake me so Thursday: Had to hand fucking wash a stagnant pile of washing, rode to work in my summer gear freezing my fucking balls off. Stuck at work late, had to go out and buy a stupid fucking pipe wrench for the shitty washing machine, pulled a muscle in my arse trying to sprint home before the supermarket dude rocked up (just made it.) Now I have to spend the rest of the frigging night with my fucking up shit washing up and tidying before Mr's parents rock up tomorrow for a week long visit. Cock.

Yeah and Monday was a bust - Stepdad is our new contract IT guy and he was in and took me for lunch. Tue was rock climbing as predicted. Wed I ran 6 miles. Th/Fr cycle only in between periods of lying on the floor at work wishing for death (shoulder pain woo) which meant Sat and Sun both involved lying around feeling sorry for myself >_>

Still here, just about. Shoulder pain returned with a vengeance and I've sprained my wrist, so my exercise (excluding cycling) has gone down the shitter. Had an appointment for my shoulder today, and have a physio referral for at some point, so fingers crossed I'll be back on the road to recovery in no time (some time... probably ages knowing the NHS) In the mean time, this week is for a bit of R&R&C (rest, recovery and cycling) and hopefully at the very least my wrist will be back on point next week. We'll see. Until then, I have some hella fundraising to do for my bike ride in May. 330 ish miles from London to Brussels via Amsterdam. A fine holiday, and a worthy cause to boot!

Word to the wise: never get run over because there's seriously nothing fun about it ever at all. Wanted to run Friday but my busted up shoulder is taking no prisoners. It's brought down the whole left side of my back, my hip, ribs, left obliques and has also worked it's way up my neck to my face. Seriously if you poked the left side of my face I would kill you because it hurts so bad. Plus side, finally got a physio referral and the GP gave me a script for more painkillers that aren't co-codamol (got pretty desperate on Th/F and popped a couple a day to take the edge off. Useless at work and still in enough pain that I required a lie down on a solid surface for 20mins around mid-afternoon. Sad times) On the topic of measurements, however, I lost an inch from all major measurements except thigh that came in a half inch larger, which is good because my quads are getting all HOO-AH again. Woot.

Okay so four days off has cleared up the uber-DOMS (no exaggeration I thought I'd done myself a serious injury shit was so bad) and my cold is basically gone also. Doing a rational from tomorrow. I'ma bike to work, 5k at lunch, bike home. Tue is no lunch workout, climbing PM. Wed is a rest day (bike only). Thu is also a rest day (bike only). Fri is a possibly a little overboard with bike, run, climb if I have the energy for climb. Sat rest day (full on) and Sun on the trainer. Slightly more moderate than my usual, see how we go from there. Weigh in/measurements shortly also

That's me. In other news: WELL THIS HAS GONE AWRY. Apparently my usual method of go big or go home isn't paying off, because after Tuesday's little OTT bit (cycle, lift, cycle, climb, cycle) I have contracted a cold and the combination of both things means I'm now I'm sneezing nosebleeds and I'm on my second day sick SO for a little bit: no lift, 1hr a week max running, climbing kept to an hour per session, turbo trainer max 1hr at max 18mph, food goals hella flexible, sleep at 9.30. When I feel less scrubbed (hopefully after a weekend of rest I'll be okay) then I can dial it up SLOWLY like a normal human.

I love carbs. Carby carb carbs. I'm a PR setting machine on the bike atm thanks to carbs. I ran 5km straight yesterday thanks to carbs. <3 carbs Barbell complex is going good. Finally managed the full reps for 3 circuits straight today, except then I suspect I injured my shoulder a bit staying in rack position for the front squats, so I didn't try any pullups (I can do 4x at 50lb assist, which is p.good) Went climbing tonight, 90min; pulled a hip flexor, grazed 75% of major appendages, got blisters on my blisters and tore a callous. Was good fun. Now I need a nap.

Did 1.5hrs on the turbo trainer this morning. Forgot how to stairs, but generally feel pretty good. Thanks carbs! Found a swimming pool on my route home from work, so will try to get there at some stage this week. Also I've decided that I'm feeling for picking up a barbell again, so introducing Tu/Th barbell complex into my week. I figure something like: 8x Straight leg deadlift 8x Row Hang clean to 8x Front squat 8x Push press Drop for 8x pushup Figure if I can pound out something like that quite quickly then I'm less likely to a/ get bored and b/ miss something because I ran out of time on lunch? Might work.

Starting to get the impression that keto diet was a great idea until I was cycling, running AND climbing. Feeling like I'm in a constant state of bonk so might have to make a decision on how to handle myself. Thinking low-carb on rest days (small carbo breakfast and not much rest of the day) med-carb (breakfast and lunch on the carbo side) on mid-level workout days (the weekend on the turbo trainer, and Tu/Th when I don't run) and then higher carb on running days maybe? But then when pizza comes back (which is actually next week) I ruin the med-carb Thursday so meh. Diet is hard. Exercise is hard. Meh-ness. Edit: I'm thinking maybe it worked before because I had the capacity, I was already going hard. Maybe after ~2months recovering I just have a lot to work back, and that would be easier with a more moderate diet at this point. Like, it was because I could go hard for 20 miles on the commute that I could keto and do 10, but 10 is hard so I can't keto and do it. Trying for 1800 cals + eating back 50% of exerted (if over 1000 calories burned), 145g protein min., 50g fat min, 100g carbs min, scaled as previously stated. Alcohol stays the same. Incidentally on the topic of alcohol: I no longer get home thinking "I really need a beer", so abstaining is getting me well out of the habit! Yay!

Okay so well I muffed up yesterday and it's just cascaded into today a bit. Basically yesterday I ate 1303 calories, and MFP reckons I burned 1334 through exercise. Mostly this is due to the fact I made this huge beautiful dinner of duck breasts and wilted veggies with a nice port sauce, but the second I bit into it my brain went "this duck ain't right" so I opted to not eat it. However seeing as it was 9pm and I was out of energy the result was a bit "well fuck this" and I went to bed hungry. This morning I woke up late (7am vs 6) and had to get my butt to work so no breakfast; by the time I got to work I was super burned out and ate my oaty odds and ends (porridge and some yoghurt), snarfled a bunch for lunch but still felt like I was dying. Didn't hit the gym at lunchtime cus I could barely walk, scavenged a car to get home, abandoning my bike in the office. Now I intend to eat a shit of a bunch and pass out at, like, 9 in the hopes that tomorrow is a better day. Especially considering I have another interview tomorrow at lunch.