Respawn - an epic celebration

[LiserFrenche]

It has taken me two weeks, since Steve's Respawn article, for me to come here and "respawn".  I really needed this article to get back on track. It has been so difficult lately.  I am so mired in guilt, shame at not doing my quests.  How can I face people from the 6 week challenge, I feel like I have let them down, that I never finish challenges, that I am undependable.  (yes, lots of negative thinking going on).  

What went wrong?  Part of it has to do with life's constant changes.  My wellness/life coach left, my favorite cardio class was cancelled, work has been getting super busy, etc.   Although these are not insurmountable, I seem to have a hard time regrouping after a set back.  For instance, My wellness coach used to reign me in when I got on the "I am a failure" kick and remind me what I was doing right and what I could do at that very moment to be healthier. Unfortunately, I got stuck in a bad place.  The perception that I have failed at my quests, has lead to my eating more, make bad food choices, and not exercise and that has made me feel worse, leading to more eating.  Because of this, I have had a huge weight gain making all my clothes feel tight.  Ugh.  I feel so gross, physically and mentallly.

 

So now is the time to respawn, to celebrate that I am back, that I can do this, to dust myself off, gather my friends and potions to go back into the battle to become a healthier, stronger person!  Rah!!!

 

I have decided to come up with new challenge quests or goals to get me to the new year.

 

My overall quest remains the same - to become stronger and faster so I am able to do the two fitness challenges I have lined up for the upcoming year (Climb Mt. Katahdin and do the Tough Mountain Challenge - a 5K muddy obstacle course). 

 

my quests

 

quest 1 - 15 minutes of movement every day

quest 2 - one balanced plate meal a day - I have been eating lots of processed foods and carbs lately with a wee bit of protein and fats.  My "plate" has been missing fruits and veggies

quest 3  - report back here or in my journal daily 

 

side quest -  report back even on bad days and work at stopping the downward spiral that I get into when I don't have a "perfect" day.  This might be as simple as reporting back on the positive things I am accomplishing; concentrating on the good things I am doing and learning but not beating myself up over the unhealthy things. 

 

I plan to set up and report back in a battle log so it can keep going even outside of the challenges. 

 

~lisa

 

 

 

[Bernard Marx]

Even if you have a bad meal, a bad day, even a bad week, you haven't failed, and you haven't let anyone down. You needn't feel guilty. Human beings are allowed to falter, it's normal to struggle. Remember, if living healthy were easy, everyone would be healthy. In the US at least, we know that isn't the case, a strong majority are unhealthy. By even making an effort, even if you fall short, you're still farther among the journey than most people.

All you need to succeed is an unwillingness to fail. (Even if you fall short, you haven't failed unless you've given up and stopped trying). If you need someone to vent to when things get hard, PM me. I've had a fair share of missteps along the way, and it feels like I take one step back for every two steps forward. At the end of the day, you can succeed, and so can I. Just shake off the slips, learn the threats to avoid, and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

[MattGannon]

I'd like to second PDazzle. He gave you some great advice. The quote in my signature definitely applies to your situation, Lisa. Life is really hard sometimes, and full of opportunities for setbacks. In the end, it's about your mental set and determination to succeed.

 

Respawn with a vengeance, and don't give in until you have exacted it.

 

You have a whole community of support here with NF and the Rebellion. There will always be someone there to revive you when you've fallen; like PDazzle, I'm only a PM away. I've succumbed to failure before, and it took a lot to get me back up. Don't feel guilty for having an off day. They are necessary. They allow us to identify our weaknesses so we may eradicate them, or at least understand them and work on getting stronger.

 

You don't need a life coach to succeed, my friend. Let life be your coach. Let your conscious teach you wellness. You can do this, even on your darkest days.

[LiserFrenche]

PDazzle and Matt, I guess the lesson learned here was to ask for help and not too wait too long.  The longer I stayed away, the harder it was to come back, the worse I felt, the more I ate (I use food to numb bad feelings), the less physical activity I did, the more I dreaded coming back and it became a vicious cycle. Reporting back here when things are going well is oh-so-easy - not so easy when you have to admit you have spent the day stuffing your face with cookies and chocolate bars and sat on your butt playing on the computer.

 

Today was a good day made even better with your support.

 

thank you so much for your support and encouragement.  I hope I can return the favor. 

 

~Lisa

[Bernard Marx]

Please don't take me for anti social. Not knowing what I'm doing, I thought I needed to acknowledge when people added me as a friend on the forum here, but apparently the button I clicked was the remove button and now it won't let me re add right now.

[Aegle]

I've also gotten off track and feel ashamed and disappointed in myself for not maintaining healthy habits. But you should be proud that at least you're acknowledging your setbacks and deciding to respawn. Remember that it doesn't matter how many times you fall down; what matters is how many times you get back up and keep fighting. Don't let your past mistakes determine your future. I support your journey and encourage you to become the best version of yourself.

[Lokesbrah]

Everyone fails and feels like shit Liser. What you do to turn it around is what makes you different. You chose coming to us for help. That is a major difference between you and those who stay in that pit and throw excuses for failure and never get out! I also failed the last challenge yet, here i am again! I was a quitter and now i am a winner. Even if i don't achieve my goals, i persevered and kept coming. And that means a lot to me! We'll help you out! Do not worry

Aegle, just for curiosity, are you a Elliott Hulse fan as well?

[LiserFrenche]

Thanks Lokesbrah - coming "clean" really helped.  I guess I needed to expel all those negative feelings.  Anyway, I am doing much better and feeling much better.  Thank you all so much for the support. You all are awesome!!!  

[starsapart]

I'm really glad to see you back!  Not disappointed - only pleased to know you're back with us!

 

Habit changing is hard work.  Everyone fails sometimes.  Take heart!  "Fall down seven times, stand up eight."

[LiserFrenche]

Thanks starapart - I was really bummed I did not do much with the Cutlasses.  I think I took on too much and got overwhelmed.  I am doing well this week though - one day at a time.

[starsapart]

Thanks starapart - I was really bummed I did not do much with the Cutlasses.  I think I took on too much and got overwhelmed.  I am doing well this week though - one day at a time.

 

There's always some other challenge, right?

[MattGannon]

Rock and roll, Liser. You got this.

[shaeon]

PDazzle and Matt, I guess the lesson learned here was to ask for help and not too wait too long.  The longer I stayed away, the harder it was to come back, the worse I felt, the more I ate (I use food to numb bad feelings), the less physical activity I did, the more I dreaded coming back and it became a vicious cycle. Reporting back here when things are going well is oh-so-easy - not so easy when you have to admit you have spent the day stuffing your face with cookies and chocolate bars and sat on your butt playing on the computer.

 

Today was a good day made even better with your support.

 

thank you so much for your support and encouragement.  I hope I can return the favor. 

 

~Lisa

This really rings true for me. If things go bad, it's so easy to make them worse (I eat to numb feelings too). It takes a lot to stand up and say that you need to do your respawn. Good for you for doing it!