Sylvaa

I wasn't sure if I was going to participate in this challenge or not. Diet and exercise goals don't seem to be my strong suit and it seems like once I announce them they become obligations rather than opportunities. So of course the new forum went up immediately and I decided I need a thread for hanging out in. Woo. Which means this challenge is going to be personal goals that will totally help with the getting healthy bit, just not necessarily directly. 

 

1. Pretzel Flea! All those sites are like "yoga with detox your liver and align your energies and open your chakras and do other metaphysical buzzwordy things!" Stop judging me, I just really wanna do yoga okay? Gosh.  

 

3. Some kind of food detox! As in like, no added sugar for X days or no processed food or eat mostly vegan or something. I have a week to figure this shit out. Suggestions accepted. (Don't say Whole 30.)

 

~*~ Super Bonus Quest ~*~

 

Starting June 1 I'm going to cut out caffeine. It's unfortunate because I lurrrve me some coffee, but my sleep habits fucking suck right now and I'm caught in a cycle of shitty sleep -> caffeinate all day -> oops can't sleep -> coffeeeeee -> etc. I don't know how long it'll go on for. Probably two weeks at least. My caffeine consumption has decreased drastically over the years but it would be nice not to rely on it to feel human and to bring my tolerance down again. Huzzah. 

Do you read Petefeet's threads? I really like his set up (where he has weekly workout goals) and does them in his own pace. Monday sucks? Okay - do it another day. I bet if you waited and did everything one week you wouldn't do that again! Would something like that help you DO workouts without feeling OBLIGATED?

Twas recently told to me that perhaps I should look into yoga (because I also don't sleep well - although, I don't live on caffeine).  I don't judge, but I will be curious to see what you find - also if it helps you sleep.

I'm going to agree with the above post for a possibility. For what it's worth as far as diets go, I'm not a big proponent of any diet that restricts any one natural food group. That being said, the 50 - 100 g of carbs is pretty reasonable (it's actually in line with my macro goals ala IIFYM). You should totally start and accountabilibuddies thread for it! I know some people who might join.

You are a brave, brave person. Good luck!

Excuses, excuses. =P

'Tis charging as we speak. It shall be finished before my run this afternoon.

Super fun weekend starts in t-minus 9 hours! We have WoW friends visiting for the weekend, so fun and games for everyone! I am also making non-alcoholic sangria so hopefully it's tasty.

Weekly update:

Fitbit charging / some food tracking completed. Question for trackers - how do you deal with eating out? I've started going to the store and buying my breakfast and lunch (which has helped with that part of tracking), but I don't have access to anything other than a microwave at the hotel. Also, I can guess-timate portion sizes, but I don't have access to a scale. I sometimes pick up salads and such at the store, but I'm SO TIRED of salad.

Today with be my 3rd day of the C25K for this week.

I did one workout this week other than running already - hoping to go tomorrow too, but it depends on plans with friends. No closer to finding my exercise zen.

In other exciting news, met a friend for dinner Wednesday. We went to Q Restaurant. It was delicious and company was fantastic. Although, no comments on my haircut.... I am disappointed (throwing that in there because they will totally read this thread at some point! mwahaha).

Found you!

Okay, it wasn't hard - but it might have been. 

So, I'm kind of all over the place.

Seriously.  The challenges I have done so far have really helped me get into the habit of working out and drinking a ton of water. Which is awesome, but hasn't really helped me get any closer to my long-term goals.

My Overarching Quest

Is to complete a Spartan Trifecta in 2016.

I want to explain something here. If you notice, none of my quests are really geared towards my physical appearance. I've not done a drop weight or body fat % quest. 

When I was younger, I was in a really bad relationship. It completely shattered my self-confidence and destroyed my body image. It makes me uncomfortable when people compliment me and makes it hard for me to focus on improving my body. 

So why am I telling this? 

I started my whole fitness journey with the hopes that if I could improve my overall fitness, then I could gain a comfort with my body. That as my weight decreased, I would find that happiness I was looking for. Last challenge, I finally crossed the threshold into a "normal" BMI range (yes, I understand the flaws of BMI, that being said, for me, it is a starting point). I thought this would do something... anything to help my mental image of myself.

I was wrong. 

Instead, I find myself just as critical of why I can't do more or why I am not further along my path. It's a horrible cycle really and one that I need to break. So, my next few challenges are going to be more geared towards setting a baseline for myself, finding what makes me happiest in my workout, and tailoring my goals to improving those workouts. 

My current overarching goal is kind of ironic. I've never actually even done a Spartan Race. My first one is going to be in July. Maybe I should have TRIED one before making my overarching goal (that probably would have made more sense). But right now, without that, I don't have anything else to focus on. So we are going to go with it and see what happens.

Goal Number 1: Track all the food / Use the Fitbit

If you are my Fitbit friend, you may notice that I've been at 0 steps per week for like a month now. I took my Fitbit off for some reason, ended up putting it in a drawer, and haven't put it back on. This is going to stop. Like, tomorrow (I'm not at home today, so it's kind of hard for me to get it out of the drawer). I've also gotten away from food tracking. This is stupid. It's not hard.

*Bonus points will be awarded for reaching 10K steps in a day and meeting Protein / macro goals - points to be determined later.*

I've been working on increasing my protein intake and last challenge I am 95% sure this is actually what got me past a weight loss plateau I'd been at for about 6 months. 

*Bonus points will also be awarded for determining, through the course of this challenge what my ideal weight is.*

Goal Number 2: Run Forrest, Run!

Complete 3 C25K workouts per week through the duration of the challenge.

I signed up for a 5K in August. (If anyone is interested in running a 5K in Central PA, let me know and I will send you a link / group info!). I'm not ever going to be a long-distance runner. Marathons are not going to ever be my thing. That being said, being able to run is something that I want to work towards. I'd like to get to a point where I run 5 miles (without stopping) twice a week.

Goal Number 3: Find my exercise Zen

I love being in the gym. Working out has become my stress reliever. That being said, I've not found MY workout. What I mean by that is that I've not found the workout that makes me so happy that I cartwheel into the gym. I've been doing the Strong Curves beginner workout and I like it, but I don't LOVE it.

I really need to do some soul searching on this. Any suggestions / thoughts / comments are totally appreciated as I'm kind of starting out from ground zero. Additionally, I think figuring this out is going to help me focus my overarching goals going forward.

*Bonus points will also be awarded for getting up the courage to talk to my fellow gym-goers (at home) and learn to Squat / Deadlift properly (with weights like a real lifter). Just because I think it would be fun but I am very shy*

Bonus Goal Number 4: Measure and Track

I've got a pretty little spreadsheet all started to track my progress. That being said, I've not measured anything as a baseline. So, I'm going to enlist my husband to help me get starting measurements to track my progress.

I want to become comfortable with my body - for better or for worse. I don't know if this will help, but I need to do some trial and error to see what does. This is something pretty easy to do and is a good starting place. 

Side note: Couldn't*

carry on

This should teach me to post at work.  Fixed for you!

It's all situational.  

 

If the guy is polite and is showing interest, a polite "Sorry, I'm married" after he asks you for a date or even just casually mentioning "My husband" before he does so will do.  No need to be nasty.  He's complimenting you (even if ineptly), he's saying "I find you attractive."  

 

You may want to check the signals YOU'RE sending too.  Are you smiling at him?  That can be flirting, or it can be friendliness, and SO many men (myself included) have a hard time telling the difference (although my cluelessness usually runs the other direction, I always so I wouldn't know a woman was flirting with me unless she threw her underwear at me, with herself still inside them).  

 

If he's a creep then all bets are off.  

 

As for the teenagers, chalk that up to lack of experience.  Especially now when so few young men have good male role models, no one has taught them how to approach a girl they find appealing (or God help them, they've learned from TV/movies/etc).  

So I really like this. In general, if I get hit on (and this is not a regular occurrence), mentioning my husband is enough to get the guy to go on his merry way.

The other day, I was at the gym and had a guy hit on me. He couldn't care less if I were married or not. So I ignored him. If I am polite and you don't get the hint, I'm not going to go around sugar-coating the truth. 

I think the onus is on men to figure out how to not intimidate women, since statistics are not in their favor (and it's hard to know the difference between them upfront).  If they're raising red flags in your mind towards creepy, you don't have to be nice.

Along with the other complaints people have shared, the issue I have with this statement is "intimidating" is subjective. I've got 10 years, 12 inches, and 40 lbs on the OP. In general, what intimidates her is not going to be the same thing that intimidates me. I do like the second part though. What, the worst thing that is going to happen is some guy you may or may not see again is offended?

If you are really concerned about your safety / intimidation, why not look into a self-defense class or martial arts or even carrying mace with you? 

*Edited for grammar*

So: Update (a real one).

The beginning of the week started badly. I wasn't feeling well and just wanted to sleep; so I did. Monday, I did about a half workout and Tuesday and Wednesday I rested. 

By Friday though, I was back into the swing of things; shoulder workout and a 2.5 mile run, Saturday was another run day, then Sunday was chest and back day. I've also signed up for a 5K in August; so just another goal!

I've lost about 5 pounds this challenge (without even really trying - I track my food and try to make good choices, but I'm fairly lax with this). Going to make my husband help me measure before the next challenge, so I really start tracking.

I've got to update my points and level and such, which I'll do over this break, but ready to move forward! 

Quick Update:

Finished stronger than I started the last week.

I'm just cleaning the house this weekend (friends in town next weekend) - so I am anti-internet for the most part.  

Signed up for a 5K in August too, so dusting off the running bit to get ready. I will do a better update tomorrow!

[so, I'm going to rant a bit for you here]

Oh, my, goodness, that is an awful, horrible bedside manner.  I mean, I guess that kind of debbie downer attitude helps encourage some people, but you would think your specialist would have a little more insight into how YOU respond to criticism. 

I saw in the Women's forums that you were told you were going to develop diabetes, so I wanted to tell you a quick story. . . My dad was always overweight and developed diabetes like 10 years ago. With diet and exercise, he was able to be completely medication free. Yeah, he still HAD diabetes, but the worst thing he dealt with were blood sugar checks.

Hope your walk is better than the rest of your day!

Oh, and I just found out I'm going to the Halestorm concert tonight alone.  Again.  Yay.  

Sounds like a perfect excuse for a NF meetup. 

Hi Bekah!

What do you like to do (other than yoga  )? 

Do you like being around kids that aren't your own? What about working at a school or daycare? Are you able to work evenings / overnight (I know that can get tricky with kids!). Grocery stores will hire overnight crews that would limit the amount of people you have to be around and are [generally] willing to accommodate disabilities.

Not to be a Negative Nancy about medical records / coding, but those work from home jobs are few and far between. Depending on where you live, getting into a non-Clinical role in the medical field is super hard.

Have you looked into seeing if you can get scholarships for yoga teacher training?

So much yes ... It's hard enough to pick up on regular social cues. I generally have to be told about it by someone else. Had a random guy change seats to sit by me on a train and started talking to me. I figured he was bored and hadn't brought a book ... Tried several conversational starts but all he would talk about was how he was just going to be in town for one night and didn't know anybody and his company had set him up in a really nice hotel and what was the night life like in town and did he mention he had a really nice hotel room for one night? Told a friend about this odd conversation later. She was facepalming so hard ... 

 

Does anybody else have trouble figuring out when conversations are over? Like, how do you know the person you're talking to is done talking to you? I have a really hard time with that one. Do they want to talk some more, or are they trying to figure out how to politely end the conversation and leave? I have no idea.

One time, this guy walked up to me and told me how beautiful my eyes were.

My response?: "They're brown."

... That conversation ended right there. Although, the whole train conversation is really good even better! (edited for context)

In regards to the second part, body language cues?

I feel like an idiot for even asking this, but I'm curious. Has anyone else encountered this with their significant other? If so, how did you enlighten them without telling them they're straight up wrong?

I haven't had this happen in regards to bulky, but I have had conversations in regards to food, goals, and progress. My advice is to be honest - since it bothers you that he's saying it, tell him so. You don't even have to get into the conversation about who is right or wrong. Is there any jealousy involved with the fact this is happening in conjunction with your PR's?  

IDK, not to start a big philosophical war, but a spouse should always have their opinion heard on matters of physique, and opinions be accommodated, within reason. When it comes to looking attractive, your spouse is first and foremost who you are looking attractive for. Absolutely noone validates (or invalidates) your efforts like your spouse.

Obviously the situation where one of you is getting in shape, and the other resorts to attempted sabotage, is not reasonable and not to be accommodated.

Even though I've worked my tail end off to get bigger, I know my wife has a definite too big point, and she definitely prefers leaner to bigger (she's not a fan of dadbod...). Some things like well developed traps, she doesn't care for at all. David Beckham does it for her, the Rock doesn't. My goals are all based on what she likes most. After all, what on earth is the point of taking my physique in a direction she doesn't like, its pretty much wasted effort unless I've given up on "till death do us part"; she's not my girlfriend she's my wife, there is a huge difference, her opinions are valid and I respect them; my attractiveness is first and foremost for her.

Not a fan at all of the level of disrespect y'all have for your spouses. Opinions, even strong, are not oppression.

I see your point, but I disagree to an extent. To me, getting into shape isn't about looking attractive for anyone; it's about being the best me I can be. Along your same lines, my husband married me for better or for worse - it is a two-way street. 

It doesn't sound like the OP wants to get bigger - it's about her husband's comments on bulky. Is this possibly him being passive aggressive about not liking how she is starting to look? Maybe. But I would think a bigger conversation around goals and role models might help to alleviate some of this.

Did anyone mention that it seems Teros put the mini under the wrong week? 

I finished the week with my walking mini complete.

For years, I never bothered with the vet because she gets so stressed and she's an indoor cat. However, now that I take her out on a leash, I want to make sure she is totally protected. 

After that incident, we didn't take her to the vet either (but she was an entirely indoor cat). Little bugger lived to be 18.

I would do the same thing if I took her outside. My two cats now are completely different and (as long as they get treats) are completely fine with the vet.

Do you have belly dancing videos or do you take classes? It sounds fun!

"Faster," Sylvaa urged her friends. While the darkness distorted any reflections from the mirrored pieces, she knew the stomping behind them couldn't be anything good.

She ran on.

For Sylvaa, running was almost second nature; the added fear only aiding her speed. She noticed members of the group starting to lag behind. She ran back, shouting encouragement at adventurers lagging behind. She ran to the back of the pack, hoping to lend support to those struggling the most. She scanned the walls as they ran, hoping and praying that the group could find another alternative to the hall of mirrors to escape whatever was following them.

I'm up to over 20 miles this week, not including anything I do today. I counted all of yesterday towards my total as it wasn't my "usual" mileage. Can I "donate" extra miles to anyone?

that they are. looked at your pics. that one on the finger seems fun

The fun part was popping it back into place. I may have almost fainted. 

guitarist's wife has a few pics of us(including one with me and a storm trooper ) which i'll post after she uploads them. i was an idiot and didn't take a phone charger even though my battery sucks and thus, said phone died like 1.5 hours or so after arriving. because of this, i refrained from taking pics to save battery life.

 

anyway, trying to catch up with you's guys now. will do a wrap up tomorrow. i have a wedding this afternoon i must attend. 

Yes, requesting all the pics! Glad the RenFair was fun.

Have fun at the wedding. 

still seems like you had fun. that's all that really matters, right?

Oh heck yeah! The guys I play paintball with are super fun and just all around awesome people. It's fun to play and help out and be part of a team. The fact that I get to hit people with paintballs definitely is a plus. 

I'm sure you are well aware, bruises are badges of honor. 

We didn't get to go in the car - she nearly tore my throat out because the sound of the engine scared her. Had to put her in the carrier. She only gets worse, actually. They had to put a muzzle on her after she freaked out and broke the first needle. Then she shit on the vet tech. She's been hiding under my altar most of the evening.

I used to have a Siamese who was horrible to take to the vet. Once, when we knew she needed shots, we medicated her prior to going, the vet had a towels around her and was wearing falcon handling gloves. She still managed to freak out, get away, and slice open the poor vet. It is rough watching your poor baby going through that.

Paintball wrap up:
 
We went to this place about an hour from home. It was beautiful. I mean, obviously - this is Central PA we are talking northern Appalachia here.

The scenario event was the Battle of Gettysburg. As a side note, I was pretty disappointed in the scenario as a whole. With the exception of the sides being the Union and Confederacy (and the Gettysburg Militia as a third smaller group), there were no battles / missions that really took advantage of the battle. Only a few people from my team ended up making the trip (most of them live east and this was a smaller event). We were on the Union side.

As a whole, I was unimpressed with the game. We asked for clarification on some rules and got conflicting answers. The refs did not do a good job making sure players followed the rules throughout. The field was a smaller field and there were only about 75 players - the third group was unnecessary.

The first battle was a cluster. It really was a "who is tough enough to get hit over and over on the Union side". We were basically regulated to a small castle while we just got hit by paintballs from all sides. (In reality, it was a timed event - we had to hold the ground for an hour). However, the Rebs could come as close as they wanted to us and we had to stay no more than 15 feet from the edge of the castle. I managed to gain a nice shot to the neck and the admiration of a bunch of guys.

The rest of the game was both sides trying to gain points. There were flags to place and defend, bottles to pick up and take to your command point, deserters to find and recruit, etc.... The Confederacy won. No one we were playing with won any awards. I don't know that we would go to this event again, but it was a fun day. I ended the evening with over 15,000 steps, so I'm considering myself good on miles for the week (even though if the weather cooperates, I'll run tonight).

All my pictures are in this link. Please be aware, it includes bruises that are not meant for those with weakened stomachs. I ended up with 12 bruises, most of which are fading already. Two on each arm, three on one leg, three on my back, one on a shoulder, one on my neck, and my hand as a whole. I did not post pictures of all of them. I got hit with a paintball so hard, it dislocated my middle finger. It also still hurts to swallow (not sure if that is from pollen or paintball). I'm going to have fun figuring out how to cover the bruise for work next week - that's for sure.

I apologize for being in a snit, I edited my earlier comments.

 

I tend to be highly protective of my wife and react badly to criticism of her.  By "react badly", I have a tendency to reach down people's throats, grab them by the tailbone, jerk sharply and turn them inside out.

So I think you are adorable and I have seen a lot of your posts that reflect how much you love your wife.

It's very hard to watch someone you love struggle. It's even more frustrating when you have ideas that can help them. I think the fact that she is reaching out to you for help is super encouraging! 

As a woman who was in her place before, I can honestly say that the only thing that truly helped me get even where I am today was myself. I know you want to do anything and everything that you can to help your wife. The best thing you can do is keep doing what you are doing - encouraging her, giving her information, and supporting her. I think Silvergamma is correct, ask her to read that and see if that resonates with her. 

I think there are some great starting points; discussing diet / tracking, different workout ideas, etc... Instead of giving her ideas and workouts, why not sit down and talk to her about what her options are? Talk about caloric needs, figure out hers, and talk about how to adjust her eating to fit her goals. Talk about what she has or has not liked exercise wise and what her options are. 

I am going to caution a bit. Now obviously, I don't know your wife. But is there any chance your help is going to make things worse? What I mean is that since you are helping, she is not only going to be letting herself down, but you also. 

And here I just said mombod because I felt awkward being a girl discussing having a dadbod. 

I think I should have clarified, that's what I'm saying the assumption of the dadbod is. That a dad should be devoting too much time to his family to be able to go to the gym every day and focus on being super healthy, at least that's what I think the idea is, I'm still not 100% sure why dadbods are suddenly everywhere. In reality of course there's no reason someone can't be both a parent and in shape, and there are probably a lot of people with "dadbods" who use the excuse of being too busy being a dad to go to the gym, much like how I know a ton of students who use exams as an excuse to not go to the gym, though obviously we students probably have more free time than most of the population so maybe that's a poor comparison.

I like that you clarified. 

I think as a parent, being in shape should be a priority - not only to keep you healthy to be there for your kids, but also setting an example to your children.

Does it take time away from my kids to go to the gym? Sure, so I encourage them to come with me (now that they are at the age that they can). If they don't want to, that's fine; but it's less time away from them than (and I'm totally generalizing here) sitting down with my friends to drink beer and watch football.

I will be the first to admit I let myself go after I had my kids. Is a mombod (is that a thing too?) possibly the best I'm going to get? Maybe - but my kids will see me work my hardest to get the best one I can.