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Best/worst/nerdiest pick up lines you have ACTUALLY used


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Inspired by Machete's "Your face.... I like that shit."

I'm not looking for the most effective pick up lines here, but the embarrassing, funny or just downright nerdy ones. Surely someone on here can own up to opening a conversation with a Star Wars reference, or a bad chemistry joke? Knowing you lot I'm sure there's some pure gold....

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"Kiss me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Heidi?"  Worked well enough to get a kiss.  

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:summer camp memories: I can't tell you the exact phrasing but I remember asking a now long time friend that if she wanted to be on our larp team

 

"Hey we are going to be the Dwarves going against the Giants and the Wizards" and I don't think I went swimming or had a meal without her that entire week; we are still good friends

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once-I talked with a guy who worked at the sound shop next to my studio.

 

I was broken up at the time- and hadn't gone on any dates and said damnit- what am I waiting for....

 

so the next week- got to the studio 5 minutes early- I walked in, pulled a sharpie out of my pocket and asked for his hand- wrote my number and turned to walk out- half way to the door I said "I'm free Friday and walked out".

 

He never called. 

 

no regrets. at all. 

 

BF and I stumbled into our relationship having bikes as a common interest... so it wasn't a pick up line- but it was a line that certainly got my attention..

phone call was as follows

ME " are you coming down to help with the parking lot practice?"   (bike training for skills- low speed- but highly controlled environment- he had taken an advanced course -I was still new)

 

HIM- yes- 

ME- are you sure- it's kind a long way

HIM- yeah- no problem- i said I would help

ME_ you just want to come stair at my ass as I ride around in circles

HIM- you're damn right I will- cause god I can't stand the sounds that come out of your mouth"

 

I almost died laughing- I'm so used to having people blow smoke up my ass- so to have someone really throw out some solid humor was probably the best thing that happened that day- I almost had to pull over I was laughing so hard.

 

Love that guy. 

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ME_ you just want to come stair at my ass as I ride around in circles

HIM- you're damn right I will- cause god I can't stand the sounds that come out of your mouth"

 

I almost died laughing- I'm so used to having people blow smoke up my ass- so to have someone really throw out some solid humor was probably the best thing that happened that day- I almost had to pull over I was laughing so hard.

 

Love that guy. 

 

Excellent!!!  Honest humour goes a long way.

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once-I talked with a guy who worked at the sound shop next to my studio.

 

I was broken up at the time- and hadn't gone on any dates and said damnit- what am I waiting for....

 

so the next week- got to the studio 5 minutes early- I walked in, pulled a sharpie out of my pocket and asked for his hand- wrote my number and turned to walk out- half way to the door I said "I'm free Friday and walked out".

 

He never called. 

 

no regrets. at all. 

Used to think this only happened in the movies, till a friend of mine introduced me to a friend of his... small group of us hanging out for the night, and we went to drop her off, she pulled out a thing of lipstick and wrote her number from elbow to wrist...

 

Ain't no way I'd pass that up..

 

Myself... I always seem to think of the PERFECT comment... about 5 minutes too late.

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How I met my girlfriend six years ago:
I had just moved back to Rhode Island from Portland, Oregon, needed to piece together a cheap computer to use.
I emailed a couple Craigslist ads that had some big clunky CRT monitors for cheap. I picked one up that weekend. On Monday, I got a text back "are you still interested in the monitors? 2 for 1, haha!" after I told them I had found one already. So I texted back "Again no, but if you're a female age 18-30 and single, I'll take a picture instead!". She texted back "bold... you first" so I sent a picture. And she sent one. And two months later we were dating. It took awhile to get that first date though. :P

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I think I've used a lot of Star Wars references during conversations with females, but never as an opening statement. I have killed what appeared to be a good flow with a Lord Of The Rings reference (and dug myself even deeper down as I tried to explain said reference).

 

#StudMuffin #SexualAthlete #MakingPantiesDrop

 

so the next week- got to the studio 5 minutes early- I walked in, pulled a sharpie out of my pocket and asked for his hand- wrote my number and turned to walk out- half way to the door I said "I'm free Friday and walked out".

 

I've pulled this one a few times. Wrote on her hand, and a book of matches. They did call. Of course, couldn't close.

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One that I was surprised actually worked...

 

As a younger man, there was a lass I had known for a long time that I was enthralled with.  She was gorgeous, adventurous and interesting (and a Suicide Girl - NSFW website).  We had flirted lightly on occasion and tended to make a lot of over the top bad dirty jokes at each other. So, one day I texted her - not expecting her to take me seriously.

 

"You, me, a bottle of wine and strip Wii bowling"

 

Her reply-

 

"Deal, I'm getting ready to take my daily relaxing bath.  I'll come by when I'm done".

 

She did.  We had a grand ole time.  We dated for about 6 months after that.

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walked up to a girl in a club, took her drink out her hand, took the ice cube out put them on the ground, stood on them and said now that we have broken the ice hi my name is.......chatted all night and had drinks, turns out she had a boyfriend who thought it was a great line and even bought me a drink.

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I don't use them as "pick up" lines sinces I'm saying them to my wife, but since there really is nothing to lose, it lets me use them whenever they come into my head. One of my favorites is a D&D reference:

 

"Hey babby, wanna go make a dexterity check?"

 

They almost always just end up with her facepalming or rolling her eyes.

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I didn't use a pick up like. It was a pirate dress up day at college, so I came in in my full on pirate gear.. The guy I liked did the exact same thing... Not a lot of other people did anything. Spending the day together as the two most kick ass pirates in Pershore was all we needed. 4 and a half years later we're still together.. And still occasionally dress up like pirates. It's just a part of who we ARRRRR.

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