Jittersthe.Clown Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 What is a math teacher's favorite dessert? Pi Quote Level 2 Warforged Druid STR: 2, DEX: 1, STA: 3, CON: 3, WIS: 2, CHA: 3 "If these people tell this story to their children as they sleep; then maybe someday they'll see a hero is just a man who knows he is free." Good night and joy be to you all ~Jitters The. Clown Current Challange: New Challenges Ahead! Battle Log: Clowning around daily Past Challenges: Leveling Up PvP Jump Rope Boss Continue? System Failure Systems Online Calling Rush Confirm Reset Select World Select Difficulty, Select Character, Repairs, Press Start, First Timer, Jump Rope PVP Challenge Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 Taking it to a new level of tasteless...They're bad...Really bad...I'm warning you...Alright... last time..How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.How many dead babies does it take to wallpaper a wall? Depends on how thinly you slice emI was wetting myself before I even got near the jokes!!!!!! *high five!* Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
insanity Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 I was wetting myself before I even got near the jokes!!!!!! *high five!*Woohoo... I gotta high five... I'm saving that one.. *Hangs high five over fireplace* Quote "Insanity - you make my world a better place man, you really do! That shit is awesome! :D" - Guzzi- My first challenge My battle Log: Insanity: Warrior Monk Honorary Ranger dubbed by DarK_RaideR, 1000 Pound club (875 of 1000) Link to comment
Tomu-san Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 What is a math teacher's favorite dessert? PiFunny, because we're having a Pi Day potluck at work today (yeah, I know, Pi Day is tomorrow, but we have a full staff today). All pies. Quote Tomu-san - Level 3 HalfOgre Ranger [ STR 2 | DEX 2 | STA 3 | CON 8 | WIS 6 | CHA 2 ] Spoiler "A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." - Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love "I came here to drink milk and kick ass. And I've just finished my milk." - Maurice Moss Link to comment
Tomu-san Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?" 1 Quote Tomu-san - Level 3 HalfOgre Ranger [ STR 2 | DEX 2 | STA 3 | CON 8 | WIS 6 | CHA 2 ] Spoiler "A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." - Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love "I came here to drink milk and kick ass. And I've just finished my milk." - Maurice Moss Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 Mmmm..... Pi Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 What did the green grape say to the purple grape?Breathe idiot! BREATHE!!!! 2 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 What's the difference between light and hard?You can sleep with a light on 4 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
insanity Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 So this new teacher get's called into the principals office. Principal asks him about his class and why his kids are always so rowdy? Teacher replies... It's because I'm cross-eyed, I can't control my pupils... 2 Quote "Insanity - you make my world a better place man, you really do! That shit is awesome! :D" - Guzzi- My first challenge My battle Log: Insanity: Warrior Monk Honorary Ranger dubbed by DarK_RaideR, 1000 Pound club (875 of 1000) Link to comment
Artinum Posted March 13, 2014 Report Share Posted March 13, 2014 Pavlov is drinking at the bar when the telephone rings. He suddenly leaps out of his seat and runs for the door, yelling "shit! I forgot to feed the dogs!" 5 Quote What happens when you play Final Fantasy VII with everyone called Cloud? It gets quite confusing... https://ff7crowdofclouds.wordpress.com/ Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard?A barber!!! 2 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
Bearded_Dragon Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard?A barber!!! ...or Tim Allen in "The Santa Clause" Classic film. 1 Quote Link to comment
robozebra Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 I skipped a few pages so sorry if this is a repeat... A piece of rope walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The rope goes over to a table to wait for his friends. A second rope walks in and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." He goes over to sit with his friend. A third piece of rope walks into the bar. Before he can order a beer, the other pieces tell him what happened. He twists himself up and pulls apart some of his threads, then orders a beer. The bartender asks him, "Aren't you a rope?" He answers, "No, I'm a frayed knot!" 2 Quote Current challenge: Respawn Time! Link to comment
Jittersthe.Clown Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 Not really a joke, joke, but it was a funny bumper sticker I want to get. "Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?" 3 Quote Level 2 Warforged Druid STR: 2, DEX: 1, STA: 3, CON: 3, WIS: 2, CHA: 3 "If these people tell this story to their children as they sleep; then maybe someday they'll see a hero is just a man who knows he is free." Good night and joy be to you all ~Jitters The. Clown Current Challange: New Challenges Ahead! Battle Log: Clowning around daily Past Challenges: Leveling Up PvP Jump Rope Boss Continue? System Failure Systems Online Calling Rush Confirm Reset Select World Select Difficulty, Select Character, Repairs, Press Start, First Timer, Jump Rope PVP Challenge Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 What do you call a bear without any teeth?A gummy bear! 3 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 What's the best thing about Switzerland?I don't know. But their flag is a huge plus. 4 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
Guzzi Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 You shouldn't ever try to write an essay with a blunt pencil. It's completely pointless 1 Quote Make Life Rue The Day Turning back the clock Recipe book 14 Life is far too short to take seriously Link to comment
maenumania Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 What's the best thing about Switzerland?I don't know. But their flag is a huge plus. I can confirm that But there are also some other things in my country that are great 1 Quote Level 1 - assassinSTR: 3, DEX: 2, STA: 2, CON: 2, WIS: 3, CHA: 3Current Challenge: maenumania learns the secrets of spidermanBattle Log: We are the hero of our story!--------------------------------------------------------------------Challenge Archive: #1 - Let's kill those rats and spider!--------------------------------------------------------------------Where other men blindly follow the truth, remember nothing is true. Where other men are limited, by morality or law, remember everything is permitted. We work in the dark to serve the light. We are the Assassins. Link to comment
insanity Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 Not really a joke, joke, but it was a funny bumper sticker I want to get. "Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?"I like it... might have to see where my fiance got my "Watch for motorcycles, they leave dents" bumper stickers made.... What's the best thing about Switzerland?I don't know. But their flag is a huge plus. From confused, to a snicker, to a laugh.... I like this one too. 1 Quote "Insanity - you make my world a better place man, you really do! That shit is awesome! :D" - Guzzi- My first challenge My battle Log: Insanity: Warrior Monk Honorary Ranger dubbed by DarK_RaideR, 1000 Pound club (875 of 1000) Link to comment
Jittersthe.Clown Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 The watch for motorcycles one made me nearly spit out my water. Well done! 1 Quote Level 2 Warforged Druid STR: 2, DEX: 1, STA: 3, CON: 3, WIS: 2, CHA: 3 "If these people tell this story to their children as they sleep; then maybe someday they'll see a hero is just a man who knows he is free." Good night and joy be to you all ~Jitters The. Clown Current Challange: New Challenges Ahead! Battle Log: Clowning around daily Past Challenges: Leveling Up PvP Jump Rope Boss Continue? System Failure Systems Online Calling Rush Confirm Reset Select World Select Difficulty, Select Character, Repairs, Press Start, First Timer, Jump Rope PVP Challenge Link to comment
Jittersthe.Clown Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 Quasimodo is retiring from Notre Dame Cathedral and is auditioning bell-ringers. He runs an ad in the French Gazette. A guy from a nearby village applies. Quasi explains to the applicant that to ring the bell, he must grab the rope as high up as possible, pull it down to the floor and then let go. "Go ahead, try it!" he says. The guy grabs the rope and pulls it down to the floor, but fails to let go and the rope yanks him up and he bangs his head on the bell on his way up, knocking him unconscious. He falls out of the window to the street below, and to his death. A crowd gathers below and Quasi runs down to where the dead applicant is lying dead in the street. A passerby asks, "Hey Quasimodo, you know this fellow?" "No," says Quasimodo, "but his face rings a bell...." About a month later, the brother of the dead applicant comes to the Cathedral to apply for the same job. Again, Quasimodo explains how to ring the bell. "Try it!" he says. And again the applicant grabs the rope but forgets to let go, banging his own head on the bell and falling to his death on the street below. Again, Quasi races down to the street and another pedestrian asks, "Yo, Quasimodo, you know this guy?" "Nope, but he's a dead ringer for his brother." 1 Quote Level 2 Warforged Druid STR: 2, DEX: 1, STA: 3, CON: 3, WIS: 2, CHA: 3 "If these people tell this story to their children as they sleep; then maybe someday they'll see a hero is just a man who knows he is free." Good night and joy be to you all ~Jitters The. Clown Current Challange: New Challenges Ahead! Battle Log: Clowning around daily Past Challenges: Leveling Up PvP Jump Rope Boss Continue? System Failure Systems Online Calling Rush Confirm Reset Select World Select Difficulty, Select Character, Repairs, Press Start, First Timer, Jump Rope PVP Challenge Link to comment
Artinum Posted March 14, 2014 Report Share Posted March 14, 2014 He had a hunch they were related? 1 Quote What happens when you play Final Fantasy VII with everyone called Cloud? It gets quite confusing... https://ff7crowdofclouds.wordpress.com/ Link to comment
Barfly Posted March 15, 2014 Report Share Posted March 15, 2014 What's the difference between light and hard?You can sleep with a light on Nope, I sleep light, but wake up hard. Quote The past is only smoke in a dream. Lvl 6 Ranger Berzerker STR 9 DEX 4 STA 9 CON 8 WIS 2 CHA 8 Barfly ain't even tryin'... Link to comment
Barfly Posted March 15, 2014 Report Share Posted March 15, 2014 He had a hunch they were related?I can just see Marty Feldman saying this. Quote The past is only smoke in a dream. Lvl 6 Ranger Berzerker STR 9 DEX 4 STA 9 CON 8 WIS 2 CHA 8 Barfly ain't even tryin'... Link to comment
Barfly Posted March 15, 2014 Report Share Posted March 15, 2014 Do you know that "Walk This Way" was written after the Toxic Twins saw Young Frankenstein? It's true!!! Oh, snap! There's my second karaoke song! 1 Quote The past is only smoke in a dream. Lvl 6 Ranger Berzerker STR 9 DEX 4 STA 9 CON 8 WIS 2 CHA 8 Barfly ain't even tryin'... Link to comment
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