Saying Hello

[Pherales]

Hello!

 

I guess this is the part where I introduce myself a little, right?  Okay, on to it then!

 

I'm Dalish, 29, from Western Australia.  Female, 5'7" and at last weigh in - 162kg.  That's really heavy, in case you weren't too sure! 

 

The sad thing for me is I never used to be like this.  Growing up I was fairly athletic, dabbled in many different sports and activities and generally enjoyed an active lifestyle.  It was a trampoline did me in.  Landed on my neck.  No breaks or paralysis luckily, but I was laid up for quite a while healing.  So much so that my core muscles pretty much just died, because I let depression settle in on me and didn't really do anything at all.  Before I knew it I was in my late twenties, struggling to find nice clothes that fit and just generally hating myself.

 

I made some really valiant efforts to change it, but because I still have issues with seeing my situation in my head the way that it actually is, I'm still convinced I can do all the things.  So I push too hard, too fast, end up with another injury and fall back into self-pity and wallow-y habits.  Like eating nothing but kit-kats for an entire day.  That was not a good day.

 

I'd been lurking around here for....goodness...years!  Back before there even was a rebels guild!  So I've seen and read a lot of great things here and I know there's a good community.  But I've always wanted to lone-wolf it.  Since that's not been working out for me, I figured it was time to try a new approach!

 

In case you couldn't tell, I've got a bit of a Dragon Age obsession!  I like a lot of other video games too, and I'm a general sci fi and fantasy nerd for the most part.  There's some popular franchises I'm not really interested in but those are few and far between (coughstarwarscough) 

 

My end goal is a little bit of many things!  I don't just want to drop the weight, though that's a big part of it.  I'm planning on Dalish roguery.  So a little bit of everything in the agility categories!  Calisthenics is something I really want to get involved with, and maybe some parkour.  Aerial stuff too! 

 

But before any of that, I had another injury a little before Christmas that I've only just finished healing up from, which has really hit home that not only do I need to take baby steps, I need to get back in tune with myself.  My brain and my body don't line up anymore, and I can't see where I am, only where I was.  So I need to remember what it means to be Dalish, and reattune with myself and the world around me.  So I'll be starting my journey here in the Druids (as long as they'll have me!) 

 

I think I've rambled enough here, I'm looking forward to the next challenge starting so I can get stuck straight in!  Nice to meet you!

[Stonie]

Welcome Dalish! It's lovely to meet you too.

 

I don't think the druids have ever turned anyone away. You're in great hands.

 

I know how you feel when your mind and body are disconnected from each other, I'm currently having that issue too and am trying to re-learn everything from scratch again thanks to an injury xD 

 

And I also started playing one of the Dragon Age games (2) and love it. Can't seem to finish it, but I love it nonetheless! xD

[Pherales]

Thankyou!

 

It's nice to know I'm not the only one in this disconnect boat.  Though it sucks to not be the only one in the boat too, because one doesn't wish sucky things on other people!  Camaraderie is nice to have

 

Dragon Age 2 was lots of fun!  I love Origins the most.  I'm terrible at finishing them.  I'll get 60-90% of the way through a playthrough and start a new one for the rush of going through the story again. 

[Guzzi]

Oh @Dalish!  Now your post about your core injury makes sense, I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. I've been seeing your intro every time I come in here but it's taken until now for me to work my way up to it. 

 

I'm another one who doesn't know their limits and pushes themselves too far too soon. Thankfully though I've never done any damage as a result (touch wood).  I get what it's like, I can't let go of the life I lived before my accident. Sometimes the frustration of not being able to do something brings me to tears. I don't think I'll ever "accept" the limitations, I will always be trying to get back to where I was. Even if I know that's not possible. 

 

I assume you know your way around the forum?  Are you joining in on the upcoming challenge?

[Pherales]

1 hour ago, Guzzi said:

Oh @Dalish!  Now your post about your core injury makes sense, I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. I've been seeing your intro every time I come in here but it's taken until now for me to work my way up to it. 

 

I'm another one who doesn't know their limits and pushes themselves too far too soon. Thankfully though I've never done any damage as a result (touch wood).  I get what it's like, I can't let go of the life I lived before my accident. Sometimes the frustration of not being able to do something brings me to tears. I don't think I'll ever "accept" the limitations, I will always be trying to get back to where I was. Even if I know that's not possible. 

 

I assume you know your way around the forum?  Are you joining in on the upcoming challenge?

 

Yeah I'm not one for limitations, I fully intend to surpass myself.  Just gotta try and take those baby steps so I can get there.

 

Yep! I have my thread up and running

[Severine]

Just wanted to say welcome, and that I'm going to be following your challenge over in the Rebel forums. A lot of what you wrote about mental/physical disconnect is really familiar to me, and I think any real change needs to involve healing that rift. It's something I'm still working on. I think a lot of us are, really - often we're too critical of ourselves in some areas, and unable to see problems in other areas. It's hard for us to see ourselves as we really are with so much history and emotion in the way. And of course, if we have trouble seeing/admitting the truth, we're going to make plans that probably aren't realistic or well designed. So I think your approach of tackling that before and/or in concert with your physical goals is the right move.

 

For what it's worth, I used to be 125kg. I know what it's like to be quite big and to start from a place that's really far from where I want to be. It can happen; it just takes longer and involves different sorts of challenges. I bet there are a lot of people here who can relate to parts of your situation. Which is part of why I like NF - so many people from all over, and so many different lives and backgrounds, but in the end we have a lot in common and a lot to offer each other.

 

You made the right move reaching out to find a group of friends who understand and have similar goals! The lone wolf thing has its appeal (I've tried) but for most people it's not as effective. Community can be so powerful. And it makes the process more fun, more enriching. I wouldn't trade the people I have met here for anything.

 

Oh, and I love the DA series (Origins and Inquisition moreso than DA2) and I think the Dalish theme is a cool one. Lots of inspiration to be had there.   

 

[Pherales]

Just now, Severine said:

Just wanted to say welcome, and that I'm going to be following your challenge over in the Rebel forums. A lot of what you wrote about mental/physical disconnect is really familiar to me, and I think any real change needs to involve healing that rift. It's something I'm still working on. I think a lot of us are, really - often we're too critical of ourselves in some areas, and unable to see problems in other areas. It's hard for us to see ourselves as we really are with so much history and emotion in the way. And of course, if we have trouble seeing/admitting the truth, we're going to make plans that probably aren't realistic or well designed. So I think your approach of tackling that before and/or in concert with your physical goals is the right move.

 

For what it's worth, I used to be 125kg. I know what it's like to be quite big and to start from a place that's really far from where I want to be. It can happen; it just takes longer and involves different sorts of challenges. I bet there are a lot of people here who can relate to parts of your situation. Which is part of why I like NF - so many people from all over, and so many different lives and backgrounds, but in the end we have a lot in common and a lot to offer each other.

 

You made the right move reaching out to find a group of friends who understand and have similar goals! The lone wolf thing has its appeal (I've tried) but for most people it's not as effective. Community can be so powerful. And it makes the process more fun, more enriching. I wouldn't trade the people I have met here for anything.

 

Oh, and I love the DA series (Origins and Inquisition moreso than DA2) and I think the Dalish theme is a cool one. Lots of inspiration to be had there.   

 

 

Thankyou   it's definitely so very nice to see I'm not alone in where I'm starting at.  A lot of the time in other places all I see is "Oh I have so much weight left to lose, 30lbs!" and I'm just fish-mouthed because there's no way I fit in with that kind of mentality anymore.

 

I'm the same, Origins > Inquisition > 2   I think the time they spent on the games really shows in the quality difference in the series.  I'm very excited for the next one but I don't wanna see it for at least three more years.  They need to polish it.

 

Thanks for following!

[Guzzi]

I snuck a peek at your challenge thread and it looks like you have made an awesome start!  Your goals look awesome and you have hit page 3 on day two of the forum being active.  There was just one thing that I was going to add...

 

You said that you've posted in lots of threads, and that's brilliant, but d on't ever beat yourself up or feel bad if it becomes too much to try and keep up with everyone. Sometimes you just don't have the energy (or time!) to read everybody's threads and if you're at all like me then you might end up feeling like you have to check in with all the people who are following your thread. 

 

Good luck with your challenge, and I hope to see you around.  

[Pherales]

Just now, Guzzi said:

I snuck a peek at your challenge thread and it looks like you have made an awesome start!  Your goals look awesome and you have hit page 3 on day two of the forum being active.  There was just one thing that I was going to add...

 

You said that you've posted in lots of threads, and that's brilliant, but d on't ever beat yourself up or feel bad if it becomes too much to try and keep up with everyone. Sometimes you just don't have the energy (or time!) to read everybody's threads and if you're at all like me then you might end up feeling like you have to check in with all the people who are following your thread. 

 

Good luck with your challenge, and I hope to see you around.  

 

Thankyou   and yeah that thread kinda exploded just a little bit.

 

I won't!    A big part of this challenge for me is all about realigning myself and finding my limitations in a lot of areas.  Including just how social I am, I guess.  I'm enjoying adventuring around, and while I comment initially on everyone's challenge thread in the rebels, I don't feel obligated to maintain a daily presence in anyone's thread but my own which I think is pretty good for me.  I just really like chattering away

[Guzzi]

Awesome!  I hope you get the same benefit from being here that I did when I went through some rough times...  

 

I was widowed in 2013 and I found the support of everyone here to be amazing. I still think that it was NF that really got me through the first year, and being slightly anonymous allowed me to kinda just be myself, y'know?  

 

Finding that people actually liked the real me gave me the confidence to be myself in real life too.  I finally managed to break free of the crippling self doubt and insecurities that plagued me all of my life.  I don't think this would have been possible anywhere else. This community really is amazing.  I hope you enjoy being s part of it.  

[Pherales]

Thankyou   I'm sorry for your loss, but I'm very glad that you found the support you needed in the community here.  It's exactly what I'm hoping for myself, so hearing that you found it compounds on my hope that I will too

 

Absolutely the same, I'm very introverted and anxious in person, the culmination of a lot of different things over the years, but I'm finding that as long as I can accept the fact that even if someone is judging me, it's highly unlikely that they're going to show it all that much, I'm finding it much easier to just let myself be me.  I'm looking forward to that translating into offline too

[LordKronos87]

Welcome to the Rebellion from another Dragon Age Fan!

[Unix]

Good luck on the path! 

 

Habits, the only thing you need. Drink a lot of water. This is something we all know, but actually few people understand the power of water on our body and mind. Drink water constantly, around the day. I often find myself with head pain, almost like a hangover when i assume less than 2L of water. Being a big ( and a very active male ), i need way more water than normal people but i think this is something you need to try for your mental and physical health!

 

Quote

I don't feel obligated to maintain a daily presence in anyone's thread but my own which I think is pretty good for me.  I just really like chattering away 

 

I can say that when you show a sincere interest in other people they will show interest in you as well. Is a relationship that feeds both. definitely we consider ourselves as the more important being on the planet, so when others are curious about us it give us a feeling of importance and we fell great

[Pherales]

Just now, Skomenk said:

Good luck on the path! 

 

Habits, the only thing you need. Drink a lot of water. This is something we all know, but actually few people understand the power of water on our body and mind. Drink water constantly, around the day. I often find myself with head pain, almost like a hangover when i assume less than 2L of water. Being a big ( and a very active male ), i need way more water than normal people but i think this is something you need to try for your mental and physical health!

 

 

I can say that when you show a sincere interest in other people they will show interest in you as well. Is a relationship that feeds both. definitely we consider ourselves as the more important being on the planet, so when others are curious about us it give us a feeling of importance and we fell great

 

I actively consume over 2l of water a day and always have.  I live in Australia, where temperatures are regularly in the 100s (fahren).  Hydration isn't a joke out here, you stay hydrated or you get very sick.