DarK_RaideR

Hello and welcome, welcome back to NF and welcome to my challenge thread. The username feels like a long lost memory, though I'd be lying if I said I remember you and what you're all about. Welcome regardless, good to have you here. You are correct about lots of stuff online being wrong, especially memes and YouTube (hence my ironic use of "Dr. Google" in the previous post). Already spoke of relatability and mistaking simply being fed up with stuff in your work or life for an actual medical condition, which is what ADHD is. It's no superpower and it's not handled simply through diets and snake oils. Would appreciate the reading/viewing list though. Challenge Day 19+20: Friday, September 28 and Saturday, September 29 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat I did make some minor expenses, like paying for breakfast coffee or bus tickets. It did briefly piss me off that my dad didn't offer to cover those and acted like we're on the same financial level, but I was quick to reign in my bullshit; those aren't major expenses indeed, plus the man's paying for much bigger ones (from gas/food/hotels during our Serbian trip to meals this weekend and what he's about to assist me with in the near future) without ever making a fuss. With that in mind, I tempered myself and avoided being an ungrateful brat. Also, I gave some cash I had to the guys next door for The Barman's expenses. Apparently they've printed out t-shirts to support him and they gave me one, which is nice. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment I did give myself some leeway on this one, however I still managed to do a bit of introspection. Deffy also had an interesting suggestion in regards to my plan, so I do have stuff to think about. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house Don't think my dad spoke more than two sentences about the housework and I'm pretty sure one of them was "there's not that much to be done, after all". As expected, with my mom's whole election thing in full swing while he's got the house repairs (and expenses) plus their trip to Jordan after that, he was more than happy to leave my housework to be determined sometime in the future. The big news here is I actually told the neighbours next door about the plans to move. Before I could finish my sentence and carry on with my suggestion, they mentioned that The Barman has said in the past he'd love to live there and should I ever move out, he'd be willing to move in the next day. Which is great, for a multitude of obvious reasons. I did message the man to also let him know of our discussion (and hopefully cheer him up with the good news) and he confirmed this to be the case. This does put the whole "apartment" business of repairing and renting it out in some sort of line for the coming months, since I also did a list of things I'd need to take with me when I move out. It's basically some clothes, books and CDs, stuff I could carry with me and won't have to bother with any transport companies. Saves me the expenses too, plus I'll rent out the flat as is, furnished, saving The Barman some moving expenses as well. In a way, it feels like I've sorted out the apartment and leftover legal cases, so that I no longer have to spread out my attention on several things but only on the work and visa bits that are also the hardest. The oddball goal: Duolingo Streak is going strong, did my lessons on both days.

@deftona @RES Literally the 5 first links Dr. Google came up with https://www.clinical-partners.co.uk/for-adults/adult-adhd-add/test-for-adhd https://www.psycom.net/adhd-test https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/adhd-quiz#take-the-quiz https://screening.mhanational.org/screening-tools/adhd/?layout=hide_progress https://add.org/adhd-test/ Bonus https://adhduk.co.uk/adult-adhd-screening-survey/ https://exceptionalindividuals.com/candidates/neurodiversity-resources/neurodiversity-quizzes/adhd-quiz-test/ https://www.adhdcentre.co.uk/adhd-quiz/

Challenge Day 18: Thursday, September 28 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat No expenses today, though I'm paying tolls on the road to and from the airport when I'm picking my dad up later today. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment As mentioned, I did some tests this morning, fully aware they're not supposed to replace a proper diagnosis but be more of a first feel if one should look further into it. For that reason, I did a bunch of different tests to get different opinions and although the questions were more or less the same, I did provide spontaneous answers and all of them seem to indicate I'm there or borderline just before it. Two things to be noted though. First, "self diagnosis" through memes can always be a trap, because they all rely on relatability, so there's always the chance of something describing some sort of frustration you can relate to and BAM you've made the erroneous logical leap into assuming you might have that thing. Two, diagnosis seems to look for, among other things, chronic symptoms (which I've had, although I don't recall having most of them during my years as a child) and those issues being problems to one's daily function (which mine aren't, at least not in some major life-impacting way). This does however confirm two of my original positions: one, adhd is a spectrum rather than a black/white thing and two, I'm not exactly looking to treat this thing if it's there, because it's not crippling, I'm more interested to know if that's what's actually happening in my head. Giving myself some leeway on this for the weekend, as I'll have my dad around and the trip on Sunday. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house As expected, did all the cleaning just before I meant to hop on the shower and drive off. Thought I'd update here first and while I was typing, my dad called to let me know his flight is delayed. Bonus mention, I did some decluttering in the kitchen. The oddball goal: Duolingo Actually lost 4 hearts in a single Spanish class, so I only did a couple of German classes before I lost my last heart there. Since the flight's delayed, I might hop on now and do a few more lessons.

So I got curious this morning and did a few five online tests...

Thanks all. Feels like I needed to get that out of my chest. Guess you now have a better idea of where my head's at and I'm certain it's still affecting me on many levels. Just having to explain that story last night compounded the sadz of being back from my trip, so I'm guessing it was the reason I just couldn't fall asleep. Eventually I got out of bed and made 2 extensive posts on 2 different forums I've been postponing for about 2 months each: one in the RPG play-by-post forum where I'm DMing a 1e Pathfder game, in which the players just sprung an ambush, meaning I had to calculate everything, put up maps, resolve, narrate and explain it, the other in the forums of Total Extreme Wrestling where I've been doing a diary much like those I used to do on my past challenges, which I'd left right before one show where I had the backlog of results but had to turn it into a narration, format and post it. Once those were done around 6am, I finally collapsed onto bed and got some sleep untill around 10, when I was woken up by a phone call. Which brings me to another thing I've been thinking about in a while, ADHD. More on this in a moment. Challenge Day 17: Wednesday, September 27 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat Had to go out and buy a sack of dry food for the cats. Also treated myself to takeout because what I'd had for dinner never really hit the spot. Things are starting to get a little tight. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment Due to the wonky sleep schedule from last night, I didn't get to do much practical stuff in regards to this;it was mostly introspection, which brings me to the ADHD I mentioned earlier. I haven't much thought about it in the past, probably because mental health awareness hadn't been that much of a thing but also because I'm guessing I considered you'd have to suffer from a crippling, almost cartoonish lack of focus in order to be diagnosed with ADHD. Lately, I've been starting to see things in a different light though and I'm seeing stuff you could call suspicious. Mind you, I'm trying to scrutinize things well before linking them to ADHD, so I'm not counting, say, a (to-be-expected) shorter span of attention due to the pace of modern life, social media etc, or what @Heidi recently dubbed TeenageBrain (that FOMO-esque sense of being unable to enjoy what you're doing because you constantly think you'd rather/should be doing something else). Much like with the first post of this thread, I'd written a long extensive analysis, in which I broke down basic ADHD symptoms and examples of how I might have been displaying them, from start/stop excitement with hobbies and projects, forgetting where I've parked or what I wanted to say, interrupting people even without meaning to, geting random bursts of hyperfocus etc. Then, much like with the first post of this thread, I deleted it all and settled for these few lines. I mean, even the urge to explain extensively and the habit of getting lost in that explanation, even before I start telling a story or making a point is probably a symptom unto itself. Hyperfixating on writing all that only to then delete it on a whim, is probably a symptom. Providing extensive background even when it's not quite needed (see my previous post and all the info before actually narrating what happened to The Barman's dad) is probably a symptom. My occasional rants and frequent use of parentheses to interject thoughts is probably a symptom. There's no need to extensively describe my experience, just look up a random page of ADHD memes and I relate to about 75% of them (because many also involve that AHDH/autism combo). I'm not a specialist and I'm not self diagnosing here. I'm just saying the hints are all there and I might have to consider a diagnosis. It could help. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house Didn't get to do that cleaning today. Most likely gonna go berzerk tomorrow right before I set out to pick up my dad from the airport, which is when I'll do this and probably a few other things just because of my mind switching into lazer focus mode before an event or deadline. Again, might be a symptom. The oddball goal: Duolingo Classes done on both languages, think I did a good bunch of lessons on each.

Challenge Day 16: Tuesday, September 26 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat The expenses, OH LAWD THEY COMIN. Was to be expected, I suppose. Still keeping things under control, more info on the details in the next goal's update. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment I was told this morning that another colleague quit my former employers, this one a decent dude who was debating of pulling the trigger around the same time as me. He had stuff to do at the courthouses today and plenty of free time after that, so we arranged a meet up for an update. Since my dad's landing on Thrusday evening and I'll pick him up from the airport, I took the car for a wash (€€) and met the guy for a coffee (€€). We caught up and I was informed another girl from our social group is planning to quit next week, so we all arranged to meet that day and the next one after work. Hit a nearby butcher shop (€€) for something to cook later in the day, then got the clean car and drove to the supermarket (€€) for the most basic and limited of groceries. Didn't spend much time home after that, just set out for the post work coffee/beer (€€) and now I'm back home posting this update after I've cooked dinner. Oh, forgot to mention, I was at the meeting spot about an hour earlier in the evening, so I brought my laptop with me and did some update on my list of things to do. This wasn't just formatting, I actually looked some stuff up. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house Didn't do the cleaning, was a toss up between that and taking the car for a wash. Decided to handle the car first since I'd be going out anyway, so the cleaning should happen tomorrow. The oddball goal: Duolingo Did my classes on both languages. I was today years old when I discovered you don't have to complete all lessons in a module to move to the next chapter, but you can also choose to take a slightly harder test and jump to it immediately. I'm still taking the step by step approach on the Spanish, which I know very little of, but as far as brushing up my German, this was a blessing and I can stop wasting time repeating the same simplistic exercises over and over again. Alright, confession time. Spoilered in case you can't handle (trigger warning) police brutality.

Challenge Day 15: Monday, September 25 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat It was return day, unfortunately. As far as this goal is concerned, I did pay for train tickets to and from the airport. Also I went into this with less than 100 pages left on the book I was reading (Mona Lisa Overdrive) so I spent the 9.99 to also grab Wyrd Sisters for the road. Oh and since I got home past midnight with only breakfast all day, I did also spend a bit to grab a pizza, some of which was saved for the next day. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment Didn't expect anything here with the all-day travel, but I still got restless (ADHD?) during the second flight (transit via Paris) and pulled out the laptop to compile an extensive list of things to be done within the next several days, so I'd say it went pretty well, all things considered. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house Nothing new here, although I should say the cats had made up a bit of a mess while I was gone. Totally justified, not blaming them. Had some cleaning up to do and might have to do some deeper cleaning as well. The oddball goal: Duolingo Somehow I managed to do my lessons while waiting for the last plane to park, as well as on the train home. This was just before midninght, so I still kept the streak alive.

Challenge Day 14: Sunday, September 24 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat No expenses as far as I can remember The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment Let's be honest here, I didn't do anything towards this goal and I've used up my two days off for the week. Technically a fail, but given the special circumstances I don't feel that bad about it. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house No further news here. The oddball goal: Duolingo Didn't get to do my lessons, so it automatically used up one of those powerups to freeze my streak.

Hey, I can help with that! Oh, you want the mainstream Greek...🥸

Almost. It was actually the left torso and right leg, just so I could flex both tats. Bit silent in here... Let's get some music going and set up the mood. Challenge Day 13: Saturday, September 23 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat Still no expenses here, courtesy of my wonderful hostess. I did however get a message from the next door neighbours that the litterbox needs a change. Told them to use some of their own litter or get a bag and I'll pay the cost when I'm back, so that's a commitment for the near future. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment It was a lazy day, so I'm counting it as my second day off of the week. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house No further news here. The oddball goal: Duolingo Found the time to get my lessons in. Also, I got a notification that @Shello is back on Duolingo after a two year absence, so kudos to her! P.S. If you ended up here after @deftona said she's too lazy to update because I practically do this for the both of us, she only had 2 of her 5 freggies for the day.

Just because

Challenge Day 12: Friday, September 22 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat Think I sufficiently impressed @deftona with my eating skills* she enthusiastically offered to cover dinner The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment Most of the day was actually spent playing videogames (we finally finished It Takes Two) but still got to talk about stuff. Not that much though, most of it was my own inner soul seeking. Looks like there's stuff to be done once I get back. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house I should mention here, there's been some developments. So apparently my dad's been trying to sort things out with a mechanic/engineer for over two years, trying to line up everything, get the necessary certificates etc in order to begin repairs on the wall of their house that used to be my bedroom. Humidity has caused some damage and while the inside is mostly aesthetic, the outside could cause materials to fall and injure a passer by. As I found out, my dad finally had enough and wary of the coming rain, politely asked for this thing to finally get going. Which it has and apparently it's a mess, because someone has to be around in the mornings when the workers are doing their thing. I get how it can be exhausting for my dad, who also has to go to work, but my retired mom could absolutely handle this. That is, assuming she wasn't the type who'd spin it around and make it about her, and how this isn't letting her to make phone calls during the day to push her candidacy and has her too tired to go downtown by the evening, and how she'd made different decisions had she known ahead of time and so on. Narcissists man, they're a handful to deal with. Anyway, I figured it simply makes sense to take a bit of the financial and physical burden off of my dad's shoulders, so I told him maybe come over next week, give me some guidelines and I can do the paintjob on my own, or with a friend or something, he doesn't have to get involved in this as well since he also started doing things at their home. He didn't say yes, but he wasn't adamant against it either, said he'll drop by and we'll see. The oddball goal: Duolingo This is a thing that's still happening. Haven't been making great progress lessons-wise these last few days and DuoLingo keeps updating the content, which keeps bumping me a few notches down. I gotta do the same lessons again and it feels a bit like I've been running in circles, but whatever. As long as I stick with this, it's alright. * They call that burger "Quadzilla" because it's basically 2 cheeseburgers and 2 breaded chicken fillets all slammed into one monstrosity. I call it "a light lil' something for dinner".

Hi back atcha! Always welcome. Only because of the English chill weather. I usually cook about 80% naked a.k.a. in just my underwear. I get that. You should see the supermarket scene around def's residence, so hot right now. Was about to answer "Yes" or "All 3" as I was reading this, but you reached that conclusion yourself already. Rangers gonna ranger and do ALL the things!

How so? Curious on the local food items? Any chance of the internet in China just Chinaing? Challenge Day 11: Thursday, September 21 The pressing, short term goal: Stay afloat Still keeping the expenses at zero. The substantial, long term goal: Adjust living and employment Had some chats with def bout my plans, brainstormed a couple of fresh ideas but at this point, it basically comes down to employment, whether looking for one in the UK, getting a short term one where I am to make ends meet till the jump (probably after I've quit the legal sector) or a combination of both. It was productive, but it wasn't the full 8 hours because I also cooked dinner as def's Super Best Friend would be coming over. She's a wonderful person and we had a great evening. The materialistic goal: Spruce up the house Can't do much for the house when you're at the house, right? The oddball goal: Duolingo Had a few cases where I didn't phrase the translation exactly the way DL wanted me to, so I ran out of hearts quicker than I should have.

Sounds like the classier, female version of The Northern Boys to me.