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  1. Sorry to hear about the work sadness/stress. Maybe this week you can focus on whatever workouts make you feel better, if any do?
  2. True, they're not required. BUT you shouldn't miss out on them just because you're intimidated. When I saw Staci's story on NF, I was intrigued but thought barbells couldn't possibly be for me. I was super unfit, skinny-fat, weak, and timid. Then a girlfriend said that she lifted, and I very idly mentioned I had thought about trying them and she said "I'll show you THIS SUNDAY" and I was very alarmed. It was scary walking into my first ever gym with her. Then it was even scarier the next week when I walked into a gym alone for the first time and sort of shivered over to the free weights section like a leaf. Well, it turns out the barbells don't belong to just big men, or ultra fit ladies, or athletes or heroes. They belong to whoever reaches out a hand to pick them up and put them down. And now they're mine. Along with dumbbells, cables, and kettlebells.
  3. I'm sorry for the loss of your serpent. How long do they usually live?
  4. If by value we mean any principle with action-guiding content, then yes, no one has no values. But if we mean moral values that one rationally considers and autonomously endorses, and makes an earnest attempt to live up to despite the inevitability of imperfection, then I think plenty of people don't. There are plenty of amoral and immoral people or people who just don't think much about it. And there can be values that one simply inherits from one's culture, that are unexamined and unchosen. That isn't sufficient for human flourishing, in my view.
  5. Sounds like a good plan. You will develop a hunger for movement instead of an exhausted sense of obligation.
  6. I'm sorry your pup isn't doing so well. It's hard when we can't help the ones we love and make them better. I'm glad yoga is working out for you, though.
  7. Awesome! Ethiopian is delicious though I'm never sure what I'm eating. And yay for having a date and social life!
  8. Just wondering. If you gradually increased your water, maybe you would increase your ability to hold it, too? I understand drinking less on trips (me too) but the rest of the time, you deserve to be a bit more comfortable, I think. Also, a friend mentioned they eat bananas before lifting to stop cramps. I eat them, too, for carbs. They have potassium, and I wonder if it works better in a whole food than as a supplement? But I'm just speculating.
  9. Lifting ruined me for skinnies. They squeeze the life out of my calves and knees. But I now have ultra high waisted MOM JEANS!!! I found a couple of cuts that are genuinely curvy (13" instead of 10" waist-hip difference) and I'm so happy. I never liked the skin tight look but had no choice because I had to split the difference between the too-big waists and the too-tight hips/legs/butt. I also don't wear short skirts because I feel so exposed. I wear wizards' separates (maxi skirts) and I would like some proper robes (full length dresses). I do really need a pair of boots, though. I have nothing at the moment. I hate looking for new shoes so I'm kinda tempted to go all nostalgic and get me some dr martens like I had as a teenager. Thanks! Oh, I'm glad you liked it. They're progressive metal, so I wasn't expected any of my non-metal nerds to actually listen Unfortunately I don't know of anything else quite like it. It does, doesn't it? It sounds so retro In fact it came out in '98. I'm discovering new stuff, too, though, and figuring out what I like. It's great fun. I'm definitely finding more that I love in the melodic death & progressive categories than in power or symphonic. But, oh my, there are many other genres to think of that I've never even tried.
  10. I think having values that you care about and try to uphold is necessary but not sufficient for a good life. You also need opportunities for social connection, meaningful work, the ability to contribute to projects beyond yourself, but also the opportunity to work on yourself and the unique capacities that make you a person (such as your virtue, intellect, talents, interests), some autonomy in deciding how your life goes, some pleasure, some skillful activity, some creative activity, and at least some mastery or acceptance of your thoughts and emotions so that they don't negatively determine your wellbeing all day, every day. But yeah, someone with no values is missing a key ingredient. There are also some basics that make this stuff more likely, such as physical and economic security, legal equality, ability to participate in politics and have access to an adequate education, etc. But that's a different question.
  11. Awesome! Yeah, leggings annoy me because I'm constantly hitching them up.
  12. You mean that you don't like metal, or that you don't strongly feel as though liquid tension experiment's acid rain was made specifically to sonically torment you? If the former, I understand completely. It's not for everyone. If the latter, I'm glad that you remain unscathed. It's practically jazz, though. Me, I like a bit of scathing Oh gosh. Is it Sunday? Do I have to do a summary? Week of Stupid Stab-Throat: Lifting 0/3 Writing 0/3 Painting 2 Reading 3/7 Meditation 7/7 Mindful eating Nope (didn't feel like cooking or healthful foods.. only wanted carbs this week) Cleaning Nope Bowiety sort of: I kept a jacket that arrived from Thredup without asking Mr Harriet's opinion on it. I am also keeping a long black velvet coat that is dramatic and fun. Other victories: I rang the health insurance, made a doctor's appointment, and got a lyft there and back. These things would previously have made me incredibly anxious and I would have put them off for days, but they were only little annoyances. The berserker spells have been absent for some time. All is quiet.
  13. This is a beautiful story and I believe that trainer may have been a magical dwarf sent to help you on your adventure.
  14. It's a bit of both... You can't hand someone the key to a good life like a package. Values have to be internalised, which means each person has to choose and endorse them autonomously*. But values that we see modelled by others can be more cognitively and emotionally available to us. So if you think you have the right values (and who doesn't), it makes sense to model them for your children, while also making them aware that other options are available and providing them with the means to do their own rational, moral and emotional analysis of those options. In short, I think you should train your children in moral philosophy *clearly, I believe that autonomy is one of the key ingredients to the good life. Not everyone does.
  15. I usually hit quote--it automatically appears in a grey box--and then write the rest of my message afterwards. It looks like you typed your message into the quote box instead of typing it outside/below Yeah, the TDEE is very approximate. It depends a lot on body fat percentage, too. Those online calculators are best used as starting guesses that you refine with experience. I found out by tracking calories while my weight was stable that my maintenance calories are roughly 2600 with martial arts and lifting, or about 2300 with lifting only. It was unexpectedly high, and might help explain why my attempts to diet backfired so badly. Just something to keep in mind because a lot of online sources give really meagre calorie suggestions for women, which can be unhelpful.