Scaly Freak

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About Scaly Freak

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    Official Good Advice/Bad Advice Nerd


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    The Academy of Pyromancy and Pyrotechnics


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  1. Of course they are. That's more or less the definition of being domesticated - a situation where humans have specific expectations and rules that you need to follow if you want to stay in that situation. Unless you're a cat. I swear those little demons get away with anything.
  2. The crowd at a large concert or sporting event. That brings the follow-up question of what the natural human state is? We really don't have a good way of investigating that, because it's not as straight-forward as simply studying cultures that have not yet been in contact with the world you and live in (no internet, no cars, etc). Everything is human-made to some extent, including the rules and roles of such a culture.
  3. There's also the flip side... there are situations where controlled and restrained movement is the unexpected and makes it look as if you don't quite belong. In that situation, it could be argued that unrestrained movement and loud vocalizing is the domesticated thing to do.
  4. I remember Chernobyl. (I lived in the part of Sweden that was hit with the majority of the fallout and, while a child, I was old enough to understand what was happening.) Good grief was that poorly handled by the Soviet government! Also, hello again! Sorry I'm late to the party!
  5. When we ran into zombies earlier in our campaign, our bard became so frustrated by how the zombies refused to stay dead that when she cast Vicious Mockery she shouted at one of them to "just die already!". The zombie failed its saving throw and stayed dead. One of the more hilarious moments of the campaign so far.
  6. Note that "social media" also includes forums like this, and any of your old accounts that you have stopped using.
  7. I'm going to take a wild guess here that between the four of you, the flu virus has been happily mutating to retaliate for when someone recovers and that you have had at least one person sick with the flu every day since your last post. And not the same person every day either. I am going to cling firm to this assumption, because if I start to doubt it, I will become genuinely worried about you, and that would just be awkward for both of us.
  8. That is a really good cause to donate to! Excellent choice.
  9. Yes, I agree. I was so focused on what Holliss did that I overlooked the insidious implications of this part. Hollisss, definitely time for strong reinforcements!
  10. This makes you much braver than average, and I hope you know you have every right to be proud of yourself for standing up to this creepy man. I'm impressed by how well you handled the confrontation and told him to leave you alone, especially while being frightened. It is a very difficult thing to do, and not everyone has the strength to do it. You are a badass. You might not feel like one, but you are. Never forget that, never let anyone tell you otherwise. I completely agree with you that moving to another gym is worth it. Your safety is more important than any gym equipment.
  11. Me too. This surprised me even more because I know how good I feel about volunteering for my citizen lobby group, who does phone banks, crowd canvassing (this activity is on hold for the foreseeable future!), letters to the editor, meetings with legislators, and so on. These activities make me feel like I'm doing something good and even when local legislators pass horrific laws, we take comfort in knowing we put up a fight, and we will be back for the next round. Now I can something like that at work too! This makes me happy.
  12. It's good that you told him to leave you alone. I'm sure the situation was scary, but now he can't pretend that he doesn't know you want him to stop what he is doing. I hope you documented this incident in your "case file". I am reluctant to say anything about your sister's behavior, I wasn't there, and I don't know why she decided to spray him. It could be anything from an overreaction to perfectly justified, and only your sister knows. I think it is very likley that it made your stalker angry, but any resistance makes him angry so that's not necessarily relevant. (Also, he's a harrasing stalker. Fuck his precious little feelings.) I do think it was very good idea to bring your sister to the gym with you. There is safety in numbers, and company means witnesses. Now, you didn't say this, so I'm going to ask bluntly, because this is absolutely critical for your safety: Have you talked to the gym managers yet? A decent gym understands the importance of keeping its female members safe and will take action on complaints. This man knows where you work. He researched you and found that out, and he is very likely going to get worse. You need to call in reinforcements. Bette safe than sorry.
  13. With as little domestication as possible!
  14. For men in that particular culture. Men from countries with a very different culture may have to make as any many adjustments to their communication method, as a woman native to the local culture might feel pressured to do. In some cases, maybe more. It also depends on the nature of the company. A corporation with employees in large facilities in 300 countries, is a lot more likely to be inclusive and actively make allowances for different communication styles, than a small local business with 50 employees hired out of the local recruitment pool. And the large corporation will have differences between the quiet local sales office, and the large marketing team that has a lot of international visitors. (I work in the large corporation environment with international visitors.)
  15. Primary goal: Survive the Flood As posted before, the clean-up crew says the water is gone and their work here is done. The area where the kitchen was has been made accessible again, which means we now can use the built-in microwave that hangs above where the stove used to be. This is nice, since that means we can at least reheat things. (Like the leftover pizza from yesterday.) Now we are waiting for insurance to receive the estimate submitted by the reconstruction crew. Once the two of them agree on how much insurance is going to pay for, the repairs can begin. The fans made the air in our house very dry and I have high hopes that my eyes will stop itching now that the fans are gone. Secondary goals: Progress varies. Meditation has been done every day, but I struggle to stay focused on meditating. My brain runs all over the place and mostly to things that stress me out. Yoga has not happened as much as I hoped, mostly because the items we had to move out of the kitchen for pre-demolition is in boxes on the floor in the dragon cave, which is my yoga spot. I don't have a lot of other suitable yoga surfaces, especially not right now. Same goes for lifting. I did work on doing good things that makes Despair upset, by taking inspiration from @Mike Wazowski and joining a couple of employee network groups that work towards diversity in the workplace. I'm now a proud member of the Women in Leadership group, the Pride & Allies group, and the network group for anti-racism allies. All three of them recommend an online course on Diversity & Inclusivity, also offered by work, so I signed up for that, and for a few virtual events hosted by all three groups as well. Aside from killing an hour of a slow workday (much appreciated), I feel considerably less despondent about the state of world affairs now. I still can't save the world, but it looks as if I might actually be able to make a difference in the tiny corner of it I call "work". Despair 1 - Scaly Freak 2 💪