Only in moderation

I thought it was probably a cake pop, but was open to it being some other sort of treat.     

Life has definitely been a lot lately. I am so glad things seem to be easing up now.  Thank you! It was lovely!   Thanks, Maerad. I know I generally am quite consistent. And intellectually I know I can take breaks and such. I just have a small fear that I will lose my inertia and then not find it again.    Thanks, Sal. ❤️    Thank you, AP. It is just so very good to have him home again. I can’t even really express it.      Hi Friends!   I am caught up on the forums again and that feels very good and right. You all were up to some amazing things while I was away! Way to go! It’s kind of like falling into a reunion to come back like this and need to do some catching up, although I think I prefer my daily check ins more. A huge part of my social time is invested in the forums and I miss you all when I am not here. ❤️    This past weekend was Canadian Thanksgiving and it so happened that Dave got home on Saturday evening. He actually beat me home by a little bit after work on Saturday, but I got to see him for ~15 minutes before he crashed into bed (it was 4 am his time). It was just such a relief to see him, I could feel this energetic tension leaving my body as I adjusted to his solidity in my space again. I don’t think I have ever had that sensation before and we have been doing this multiple times a year for the last four years. I am not sure why this trip was such a challenge mentally and emotionally, but it really was. I am so glad we are done with it for now and have some time together before he has to leave again.   I made turkey supper on Sunday for us and The Fam. The turkey was the most beautiful bird I have ever made and the stuffing was absolutely the most excellent stuffing we have ever had. Bookmarking that recipe for sure. It was a lot of work though and I was pretty tired by the end of the day. I also made an angel food cake for Kate’s birthday - it was a boxed one that I iced with a pre-made icing. I felt guilty for not doing it from scratch, but I recognized that as weird food purity = love nonsense from my childhood and gave myself permission to make it easy on myself in light of all of the other cooking and cleaning labour I was doing. The cake tasted fine and she seemed happy with it and that was all that mattered. We hung out on phones for a while after our meal and Dave went to bed. Then Bryon and I started building characters for the Christmas one shot I want to play for my birthday in December. It was a restful evening.    Turkey:   Monday was a holiday and I was off work. I got up and decided to paint minis with my coffee instead of doing Bujos as I normally do. I painted an igloo and some stands of candy canes as part of the terrain I want ready for my party. There is a lot to paint to be ready, but I put my headphones on and just went to it and it was very enjoyable. I spent most of the day painting and it was restorative in a way that I hadn’t felt in a while. Part of that very well might have been that Dave was in his office right next to me with the door open and I could perceive him puttering away.   Painting pics:       I am adjusting to the increase in noise now that he is back: computer on, printers working, tv on, snoring… it’s all there after two months of consistent quiet bordering on silence. This is always one of the challenges of reintegration. I am managing pretty well, but it is helpful for me to have noise cancelling headphones to dull the morning news roundup and a spare room to sleep in while he gets over this cold and hopefully the snoring reduces.    Yesterday started with the gym, which was good, and then work, which was fine. My feet were bothering me a bit at work which is highly unusual since I got my orthotics, and I hadn’t slept very well the night before so I was tired and a bit fried by the end of the day. I came home and ate leftovers and then laid down on the couch and was a pancake until we decided to go to bed at 9. I am amazed at how little I wanted to do last night. I haven’t had a night like that in a long time.    Today I don’t work until noon, so I did coffee and Bujos and now forums. It’s just after 10 now so I am making good time and might be able to get some chores done before I need to get ready for work. I don’t work tomorrow through Monday and go back to work next Tuesday. I am glad I decided to take some time off now that Dave is home. Not only do I think we would benefit from it, I know I am riding the edge of burnout with how weird I’ve been lately so taking some time away from the constant stimulation of the cafe is probably a good thing. I need to practice some non-attachment to me not being there and things not being done as I would do them - I am the chief closer, but not the only one, and it is not solely my responsibility to make sure things are right and tight. I am allowed some time off.    Houseguest tried to come for this period of reintegration again. I was able to delay their appearance by a few weeks, but they will be coming out in November for two weeks. I am not really thrilled about this (honestly, reminded of Snarky’s Visiting Uncle) but more than anything I am just grateful their appearance is not interfering with reintegration this time the way it did last time. And I am glad they are only coming for two weeks instead of three this time.    I’ve been thinking about Christmas gifts and what I want to do this year. I am hoping to kick my creativity into gear and draw some character portraits for some of my gaming group, and do up a sketch of Roger for Dave. Part of this is the desire to be personal in my gift giving this year, part of it is a desire to not be spending money and feeding the capitalist mechanism if I don’t have to, part of it is a desire to be creative and see where that goes. Lots of desire. Let’s see if that translates to work ethic.     I think I’ll do my challenge wrap up in another post. Forthcoming.    Thank you all so much for being here. I appreciate the love and support and patience. This place is truly something special. ❤️ 

It's half the reason to date or have a partner honestly. Steal their reframes of my rougher qualities and borrow their perspectives on me, sorta back door access into self love. (heh heh, please write "back door into self love" on my tombstone)     Fully agree on the cumulative progress style of games rather than the possibility of your character dying. Probs speaks to how I like to play video games with god mode on, no fail condition! Why make a recreational past time stressful?? (yes, I know, eustress/flow state is possible from undertaking navigable risks and succeeding, but sometimes I don't even have the capacity to handle Eustress. I just want to watch Steven Universe and eat cake.)     Still can, just gotta hit return twice, and helps to have a space between the text and the break you're trying to create. At least that's true for me on Chrome browser in windows.      You're not wrong and I always like your eye for art. Speaking of blue art - this local gallery is doing a Maggie Robertson exhibit (I don't know who she is either) and they committed the worst sin in art curation. How can they be so pretentious about a blue horse when the gallery is held in a storage shed??     We'll always be grateful to your region for providing us with the pasty, the saffron bun, and fairings. In return, I now offer you a kitchy American party dessert called Cake Pops. You make a cake, crumble it and blend with buttercream icing, then wad it onto a few hundred sticks and then dip the whole mess in chocolate.   The starbucks parade float tried to hand these out at Pride this year, but they were late in the marching order, and the cake pops were melting before they reached the start line. Thank god for us chubby queers, always to lend a hand to the cause of consuming desserts before the confections and marchers alike turn into lumpy puddles.  

Just a quick note before I dash off to a meeting. No gym last night or this morning. Slept early and well, and didn't wake up until late. I think it was needed, and then a quiet slow morning after that until I logged in. This is the Way, at least for right now.   Work is work, and I'm spending the day putting together a lot of ducumentation in preparation for a meeting on Friday morning that will likely end up being a bit of a big deal. Okay, Universe, thank you. Off to meet with Librarian Shannon over lunch. ❤️   

No apologies needed, and welcome back, Friend! ❤️ 

I am planning a more home made Christmas this year too, if I get myself together enough to draw character portraits for people. Good job getting ahead and dodging the stressful rat race of Christmas consumerism! 

I like your illustration. It captures the feel of working comfortably at home. 🥰

Happy Belated Thanksgiving, TG! I hope you had an amazing time.    Glad you got out of jury duty, that sounds like it would have been a complication you don’t need with how busy you are right now.  

Oh wow, that is an update! I am glad that they think they know what is going on with your calf and hopeful that there is a resolution that isn’t too invasive. I am glad you had a good enough time on your trip and that flying and surfing didn’t make the clot situation worse. You look so badass in your photos!!!