Long weekend, lots of people, lots of talking. Two rounds of letting people know I'm looking for a new church and why. Lots of people being sad and angry for me.   I still feel more than a bit torn. I could stay and just dress "normal" when I play. I could stay and dress how I want and keep playing and say FIE on anyone that has a problem with it. I would be supported either way.    But I think of the last time I played, seeing my reflection in a car, removing earrings and bracelets and binding my hair and wishing I had worn a more "normal" shirt... and I can't.   It's just clothes. It's so stupid for me to make a fuss about says no one but me. It's so stupid that anyone else would make a fuss says almost everyone I've talked to.    I don't feel like I can play the violin there any more. I need to play the violin in worship. So I need to find a new place to do that.   Saturday was painting and telling the teacher. She was worried I wouldn't come to painting any more (it's at the church) but I told her I would still paint with her.   Sunday I went to the same church as last week. It was nice and is listed as a possibility, but I'll try some other's before deciding.    After church I had lunch with a small church group originally formed 15 years ago to support me while I was going through my legal troubles. It's like a cluster of surrogate parents. Telling them I'm looking was hard. They're angry, for me, that stupid people are robbing the church of my talents.    I haven't been there in two weeks. People are already asking one of my "mothers" about me.   We talked about where I'm going to go. Told them I was looking at a list of "queer friendly" churches in the area. The now retired pastor said to look for churches using "open and affirming". He doesn't approve of the ELCA, but is encouraging me to look at the Episcopalian churches in the area.   We also talked about books. I'm supposed to get And He Sent Leanness Others are looking at The Soul of Shame, but I'm advised maybe not now on that one. Other interesting sounding books: God on Mute and If Jesus was Serious 

No, no, and more no. Verily, I say NO unto all the things!   I had a good end of the week, and canceled many things, and said no to worry, to stress, to calendars, and to invitations to do even more. I remembered that I have nothing left to prove. I feel a bit better (though far from 100%), and I am looking forward to carrying this restorative pace forward.

Thank you, Hal. True! Rest and tea for all, liberally and often! Thanks, Sov. It really did wonders just to unplug.   The healing Friday went exactly as it should have, which is to say that I remember almost nothing since all I did was sip tea and take very long naps between doses of cold-begone.    Saturday’s visit with Georgia was lovely. We got pizza and just generally hung out with each other, as we do. She has a tremendously sore calf and so taking it easy was definitely all she wanted. We watched a couple episodes, read near each other in the Library, chatted about whatever came to mind in the moment, and played games together, and we repeated all this today, and it was lovely and good. I gave her the 2024 Marching Band shirt, and we talked a bit about band, and I do hope she will be allowed to go to the football game Friday night. When I ordered the pizza, I ordered what I thought was two brownies and which turned out, in fact, to be two pans of brownies, and I sent a whole pan home with her to share.   After she went home, I had makeup pinball night, so I got my things together and went downtown tot he museum. Most of the women were able to show up, and we had a full house, which was nice. I think we are all exhausted though. I certainly was, and I left early, which I usually do. Even so, it was good to see everyone and say hello and catch up, even if only briefly.    I considered taking a bath when I got home, but I was actually a bit too tired for that, as odd as that sounds. And also I was hungry. I generously scooped some cranberry pecan chicken salad into avocado halves, poured a tall glass of milk and sat down with The Thursday Murder Club. I’m a bit more than halfway through it and it continues to be delightful. It’s exactly the sort of fare that I need right now, with exactly the right tone. The meal had enough of all the right kinds of fats and protein in abundance; the fiber and carbs are bonus: when my head gets all spinny and my ears start to ring, i need healthy fats in abundance, enough to saturate everything to a point of replenishment. I can’t just sit around and drink milk — I mean, I kind of did this during the first half of 2020 and again through all of 2023, and it was very helpful, but over the course of last year I also started looking into some other healthy fats that could help fit the bill. Avocados have a nice boost for fiber and vitamins,  and a bunch of trace minerals that are needed as well. Using them as my shell for chicken salad feels like goblin food, honestly, because it’s so rich. The cranberries and pecans feel a little luxurious, too, even though they are in there for nutrition.    I set everything to rights in the kitchen and the library, ran the dishwasher, and I’m ready for bed. I don’t really want to go to work in the morning, or even to meet up with my Jedi council for lunch tomorrow, but I think this is just me still being worn out from this whole week.   I hope you had an excellent week, Friends. Week 4 had two trips to the gym and a lot of restorative rest for me otherwise. My house is clean, and my homework is done enough.  My food was nourishing and satisfying. I have a book and knitting. Life is good. ❤️     

Scientia potestas est Society of the Wise • Est. 1775   The Folly Russell Square London, WC1B 7ZF     6th October, 2024   Dear Sara, That is the best primary response to bombs, I've found.   On the whole, I'd say that it proves the point, wouldn't you?     Yours,   Thomas Nightingale   Detective Chief Inspector, Metropolitan Police Acting President, Society of the Wise    

6th October, 2024     Dear Inspector Nightingale,   More or less. I'd say not being in range of the bombs going off for a few hours was the biggest help, though.     Sincerely,   Sara Kingdom   Trainee at Large, Society of the Wise    

#6 Trek   How could I not?     I attempted exotic and binoculars,  but I wasn't happy with the results, so I'll keep those to myself.

Thanks!  I’m finding the balance between healthy and fun for me, and I mean… figuring it out has been delicious  

Scientia potestas est Society of the Wise • Est. 1775   The Folly Russell Square London, WC1B 7ZF     6th October, 2024   Dear Sara, Yes. Did it work?     Yours,   Thomas Nightingale   Detective Chief Inspector, Metropolitan Police Acting President, Society of the Wise    

6th October, 2024     Dear Inspector Nightingale,   I had a problem and took a walk. Is that how it's supposed to work?     Sincerely,   Sara Kingdom   Trainee at Large, Society of the Wise    

What pretty pictures, and cool Halloween art stuff. Except the ghost baby😀 That would give me nightmares. Something about dolls like that freaks me out.