Round Two

[Jesselle]

Hey -

 

My name is Jesselle, and this round two for me. I didn't really introduce myself the first time so I thought I'd do that now, given that the next challenge probs won't start until March so i have a little bit of time to get my head on straight and get reconnected.

 

Here is a bit of my story.

I first signed up with the rebellion back in 2014, I was super amped and jumped head first into a challenge. I did't make it all the way through before the demands of my job at the time took over. Since then I have been the poster child for on-again off-again fitness/health commitment. But then this is little wonder to me, as my ability and commitment to taking care of myself is deeply affected by my struggles with depression. 

 

This last fall I was doing well, and I signed up for hapkido at a dojo that offered flexible classes and a lot of personal attention. It was great, and for two weeks I was there every second day, I was eating well and getting enough sleep and my sensei was working me like no bodies business. Then I broke my ankle in a sparring accident. It took about three months to get back to fighting form, but the damage to my motivation was done. This combined with breaking up with my significant other in the new year set me up for a month of netflix and feeling sorry for myself. I didn't just fall off the wagon, I jumped off and tossed a grenade behind me as I was falling.

 

Now here I am, getting very little exercise, eating junk, and not getting nearly enough sleep. This is a problem for many reasons, but a big one for me is that I am actually an actor and performance artist. While I am not currently working on any projects I have a few things coming up in the summer months that promise to be quite challenging. It is important that I remain physically, mentally, and emotionally capable of engaging with my art. I woke up the other morning and noticed the first whispers a new episode of depression and no thank you, I am not interested in that. I am not interested in letting another episode steal all the awesome things about my life right now away from me. And I know from experience that self-care is the best way to stop the on coming storm. 

 

So then, in an effort to actually make something happen instead of hiding in bed, I am going to get back into a challenge. In a way it is perfect that there are a few weeks left in the current one. I want to use that time to do some really basic stuff, to get back to square one instead of standing in the negatives over here. I want to slowly start fixing when I go to sleep (1am instead of 3 or 4 am), I want to drink more water, and I want to commit to getting up and getting my sweat on for half an hour everyday. 

 

Anyway, that is my rambly intro. 

Thanks for reading

 

- J

[skinNbones]

Hi welcome back to the rebellion.

"Now we know that Trolls also explode."