I've been thinking about goals going forward and the next challenge. I'm happy with the cooking progress I've made and want to keep advancing on that, but I've been thinking that improving my sleep hygiene is where I need to go next, but I'm torn and a bit scared.   My thought has been to banish my phone/tablet/laptop from the bedroom, all food, and drinks not needed for my medication. I could read in bed for a little bit,but that would be it.    Why I think this would be a good idea. 1. When tired, and especially when I've taken my sleep meds and not fallen asleep, I tend to be really, REALLY, dumb. This leads to things like over eating, buying stuff I don't need, getting sucked into things instead of sleeping.  2. My sleep schedule has been all over the place.  3. I want to get up earlier,  sobI can use the cool morning time to get back to spending time outside every day.  4. It seems like an important part of my quest to be a real adult.    My reluctance has been: 1. I've gotten used to listening to Science and Futurerisim with Issac Arthur as I go to sleep, and do find it helpful.  2. I need to take a 2nd dose of my sleep med no later than 2am. I use an alarm on my phone at 1am. If I wake up between 12 and 1, I'll take it, tell the alarm to skip that time, and listen to a bit more Issac as I go back to sleep. 3. My bed has ALWAYS been my safe/comfortable place. From when I was a kid, needing to escape, or living with other people, wherevI could always be alone... being on/in bed is kind of a self-soothing linchpin. Most of that is surmountable, BUT   4. There are times when I just can't stay up, but can't just sleep either. Today has been a prime example. After work today I was hitting painfully tired. Yawning, eyes watering, couldn't keep my eyes open to watch something while sitting in my chair. Ended up in bed with eyes closed, just listening to stuff by 2pm. Been up and down a few times, including checking out the music festival literally happening outside my front door, but mostly been in bed this afternoon without the reserves to do much else.   The Levels of Tiredness  1. Not Tired: Theoretically possible within the bounds of known phyicis. 2. Tired: about as good as it actually gets. ¿Estoy consado? No! Yo soy consada. 3. Really Tired: I can push through if needed, but I'm looking for outs. 4. Painfully Tired:not a euphemism or hyperbolly; so tired it physically hurts. 5. Bad tired: driving would be criminally reckless. 

Week 5 Roundup   Run  Other movement 🌟🌟 Meditate 🌟🌟 Nature Appreciation 🌟 Unloved Hobbies    Bonus   Adventure 🌟 Posting/hype 🌟 Photos 🌟   Running total: 42 🌟 YES!   It was a rough week at work but otherwise pretty darn good. Sunday was my last concert for the season, a local folk festival. The Balkan Babes actually went on stage wearing my handknit (and in some cases handspun) sweaters! It happened because at our last practice, we were talking about what to wear since it was supposed to be rainy and cool and someone said “let’s all wear gigantic sweaters like this one!” Someone else said “I don’t have any giant sweaters,” and I got to be like “I GOT U BABE all I knit these days is giant sweaters LET’S DO THIS.” It was fun seeing my stuff on very different bodies than mine, haha. I think we looked very cool and I sent one sweater home with the friend who wore it, since it doesn’t fit me well any more and it looked super on her. Too bad the audience was tiny since the weather was awful, but we were great!    I spent some good time meditating. I have been noticing that sometimes I’m not really able to Do It, I’m just sitting in quiet and letting my mind wander, without any ability to refocus regularly on my breath. This week 2/3 sessions felt successful. Obviously my mind was still wandering (and the last one, I just tacked it on to a yoga session without telling anyone so Mr. Radost and Sibling B both intruded with dinner-related questions/comments, whoops). But it was like a dog with good recall rather than a swarm of butterflies.    Adventure hike today was lovely. It took longer than I expected to hike about 10km 😅 and I may have underestimated how much food I would need but it was a beautiful day to be out in the forest. I wish I could share the smell with you all, it’s magical. I biked out to the park, about an hour and a half ride each way. Most of the trip is on a lovely, flat, lightly-used rail trail, but the leg closest the park is on a windy/hilly road where locals drive famously fast. On the way out it was nbd, just not that pleasant or picturesque riding on a gravel-strewn shoulder as folks pass me doing 100km/h. But there’s a long, low hill and coming back I was flying down it, probably doing 40 at my fastest, and while it was exhilarating I was also VERY aware of how fragile my meat suit is, and how extremely fucked up I would be if the drag from a passing container truck knocked me over. So that’s why I don’t often hit this park, even though it’s lovely.  Don’t tell my mom, I think she’d faint.    Just a few photos…I had to save battery for identifying plants and birds! Oh, I saw some pileated woodpeckers! But I didn’t get a photo, just a video, so you’ll have to find me on Instagram for that.     

Overall I think I did well at this challenge. Ordering food is still a big problem but I did way better this change. I'm going to try and do even better next time  having the bbqing weather has helped I think. I want to start getting up earlier some days to make breakfast.. It will be a huge struggle because I finally get to sleep in sometimes again but I think it will be worth it.             

30 reverse plank kicks - 🐝  (well, that was a thing) 60 seconds balance hold - 🐝  (2x30 seconds - right leg was more wobbly)

Have a great time tonight and a safe trip!!!

Oh, I have no intention of quitting, that's just what all the bad thoughts are telling me to do. If I do end up with that team, I definitely won't be on their A team (at least not to start), but I'm sure I could be part of the league. But, I don't know yet what team I'm going to end up joining, or, with the other potential job still in play, even where exactly I'll end up since the 2 jobs are on the very opposite sides of the metro area.

I've almost died laughing twice this past week.   The first time was with Flemish sitcom "Nonkels" ("Uncles"). It thrives on West-Flemish dialect and on ludicrous situations, but this one *really* knocked it out of the park. Watched the episode with brother-in-law, and he was as much in stitches as I was. I'd say it's so offensive that it crosses the line twice, but really, it crosses the line twice at first, and with each subsequent bit crosses it twice more. And it's one of the funniest things I've seen in a while because of that... 🤣   Context: The bearded gentleman (Christian) is the owner of a large garden supply store. A recurring character in the second season. Played by a well-known actor, comedian and singer who's from the town where I live! The one with Down syndrome (Gianni) is his employee. A recurring character in the second season. Played by someone with Down syndrome who expressed his dream of becoming an actor in a reality show a year prior to this series. The one with dwarfism (Wesley) is a friend of Christian from the golf club. A bit part. Played by a well-known stand-up comedian with dwarfism.   Wesley's role in the series is so minor that I suspect that he was only included specifically for this scene.   One of the main characters had just learned Wesley's name, and immediately mocked him with it, because there's a real Flemish cartoon called "Gnome Wesley", and well, the one with dwarfism is called Wesley. So Wesley was already a bit agitated when he arrived in Christian's office.   Cue this: Translation:         The second time was with a clip from Dutch stand-up comedian Jan-Jaap Van der Wal's new show.   Jan-Jaap Van der Wal is a Dutch comedian who's been living in Belgium for a few years now. Mainly does stand-up shows here, and presented a TV programme for a while, and is relishing his transition from Dutch to Belgian/Flemish. His previous stand-up show was titled "The New Belgian" for context. Now it's election week here, but since he's Dutch, he can't yet vote in Belgium. His new show is called "No vote." (or: "No voice." because the Dutch word is the same for both)   He starts by explaining that hasn't lived in Belgium enough years yet to be allowed to vote here. But he did have to vote in the Netherlands back in November.   His timing and delivery were spot on with this:   "I voted for Geert Wilders." (a right-wing extremist) (beat for audience murmuring) "I don't live there anymore anyway..."   😂

Ngl when I went to the ER the first time the doctor just causally said "some people have staph living in their nose" as a possible explanation I was like uhhh no thank you?

Busy day Saturday! I took a leave from my show choir to do Grease, but agreed to come and cosplay as Snow White for their end of year shows today/tonight. So rocking the wig, the gown, and the Disney princess attitude. Lots of little girls at the show this afternoon warning me “don’t eat the apple, Snow White!”  An evening show coming up in a bit, then the last sleep in my own bed for awhile, we leave for Athens tomorrow!