Im here to make a change!(long story inside)

[Leafan89]

First let me start off by saying at first glimpse this looks like a great place to start a journey and thank you for having me.

What I'm hoping to find here is guidance, friendship and the biggest one for me... Accountability.

So here's my story. I've been the biggest kid my whole life. Always taller.. Always fatter. Because of this it took me a long time to become a more social person. I'd spend a lot of time holed up in my bedroom playing games and preferring to be left alone as opposed to going out to do things.

Fast foward to 2008. I am attending Lincoln Tech in NJ. Working full time. Up at 5 am. To bed at midnight. I got to a point where I wanted to lose weight but did absolutely nothing to make it happen in fact I did the opposite!

I was living in New York outside of NYC. Chinese food daily. Whole bags of potato chips. 2 litres of soda... I topped out 367 lbs at 19 years old. I was a dead man walking. I remember lying on the floor one day after over eating and crying because I felt terrible both physically and mentally. It's not definite but around this point I believe I became a diabetic.

I got to the point I was so busy I wasn't eating well but managed to lose quite a bit of weight anyway. For a long time I didn't get on the scale. I thought it was inevitable that I was just going to gain more and die young.

Fast forward to 2010. I moved back to my homeland of Ontario, Canada. Hamilton was my landing spot to be exact. Throughout the time of not eating well as mentioned above and beginning to eat right in Hamilton I had somehow managed to drop 57 lbs. I would spend the next year fluctuating between 305 and 310 mostly.

Eating decent meals, going for walks almost daily and drinking water(something I had literally never done until I moved to Hamilton) I jumped on the scale one day. It read 301. I was ecstatic. I was looking better than ever and had a few potential gf's and I was a very happy man. At 6'4 dropping 66 lbs was significant and very noticeable. So I celebrated. By going to a buffet.

301 was the closest I would come to getting under 300. I spent weeks after that trying to cut a few lbs and I did so unhealthily at times. It just didn't happen. I plateaued. I got frustrated and I stopped trying hard. January 2010 I was diagnosed as a type 2 diabetic. I long suspected it as I would often feel the lows of blood sugar levels the shakes the weakness leading to panic...

Fast foward to today I am now living in Cornwall,ON. I hopped on the scale. 326.6 lbs. In that two year span I often hovered between 307 and 315 despite having a gym membership and jogging and trying to eat better.

I had a wonderful girlfriend after moving to Cornwall. She was good to me and I didn't appreciate her like I do now that she's gone. We were together for a year and change on and off. In the final month we broke up. I went to the bar. Ate wings by the dozen drank beer said screw everything.

Now here I am. It's been 3 months since we were together and while I am over her now and ready to move on my body hasn't made a move despite me getting out and being more active in sports.

I feel as though I am an athlete trapped in this body. 6'4 but with 326 lbs packed onto this frame. I can move like a lot of big guys can't. I have a ton of heart and determination but my willpower is weak. My confidence is low. I find myself lost and not where to go or what to do anymore.

On top of this I am going a truck training school. I love to drive and trucks seemed like a good fit. So a sedentary career awaits me beginning next month.

I am ready for change. What I need is your support. I don't have the necessary support at home. I ask those of the rebellion to stand up and be my pillars as I build a foundation for which I can live a long and healthy life and eventually I will join you as a pillar in holding futue members accountable. Thank you.

[skulblaka]

Welcome to the rebellion! It's great to see you here ready to change your life for the better! You should definitely check out the looking for a sidekick section to see if anyone is in your area, or if anyone's looking for an online accountability buddy. This is a great place to be, and we're so happy to have you!

[D_chelyst]

When you do get your truck driver job, consider trying out the Angry Birds workout plan (or parts of it) while you're at your stops. My brother-in-law is also a truck driver, and he sometimes has lots of time while he waits for the truck to get loaded/unloaded. Good luck with changing your exercise and eating habits, and welcome to the Rebellion.

And check out Joe's story for those times that you need some encouragement: http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2012/01/18/10-months-128-pounds-lost/

[Leafan89]

Thank you for the replies! I will take both your suggestions and put them to use!

I actually read Joe's story. It's very inspirational and certainly helps dispel any doubts that may creep in.

Any suggestions on which guild I would be suited to try? I'm just getting into body weight excersise. I have tried everything sparingly. I'm fairly athletic for a 300lb'er but obviously stamina isn't there at all so I can certainly manage high impact and aggressive forms of excersise but in moderation.

I just want to get in shape! Tired of sweating when doing nothing! It sucks!

[Siferiax]

Welcome! sounds like you have quite a bit of story behind you. Good to hear you're going to give it another go.

Any suggestions on which guild I would be suited to try? I'm just getting into body weight excersise. I have tried everything sparingly. I'm fairly athletic for a 300lb'er but obviously stamina isn't there at all so I can certainly manage high impact and aggressive forms of excersise but in moderation.

What I did when deciding on a guild was looking at where I wanted to be. I wanted to be strong, but also have lots of endurance, so I picked ranger. I'm now working toward actually becoming a ranger!

That's my take on it. And you could always join the adventurer guild until you really decide

[EightDigit]

Sounds like you just nailed the hardest part- deciding to take action and then doing so. Congrats, and welcome!

[Skirler]

Welcome to NF, dude. I LOVE that you are an athelete trapped in a different body - you'll become what you really are here.

As to guild choice, i second what Kibcy suggests ... what is your end goal? or if you perhaps don't have a complete end-goal picture, join the adventurers' guild!

We'll all cheer you on wherever you end up!

[Horsedog]

Hey Leafan!

Glad to have you aboard! Too bad you're not still in the Hammer...coulda met for a workout or something. Anyway, hope your transformation goes well...into the athlete inside!

Any ideas on specific goals to unleash that bad-boy? It always helps to be working towards some short-term goals in pursuit of a long-term objective. I think there's at least one post about goal setting on the main NF blog (Steve's blog).

Good luck!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Leafan89]

Thanks for the support everyone!

I'm going to have a look at Steve's blog for the article on goal setting.

Off the top of my head a couple of my biggest goals right now are to make better decisions with my food selection.

In the fridge I have eggs fruits, vegetables, greek yogurt I always have bags of almonds and protein powder BUT the second I'm bored or feeling like a snack I grab juice or chips and other heavily processed "foods" with little nutritional use to me body. It's always been my downfall.

Secondly I think dropping 20 or so lbs would put me in a great position to kick the rest. Having both goals work in unison is the hard part for me. When I'm working out my body constantly wants to eat and craves things and when I'm focusing solely on diet and eating right I find I lack the energy to work out so for years I haven't found a middle ground yet.

Back in Hamilton when I was hovering around the 300 mark I got easily discouraged by the numbers on the scale despite the fact my shirts were fitting and looking better on me then ever so I think the "Joe's story" approach would benefit me. Avoiding jumping on the scale impulsively should do me well. I am going to add pictures once I figure out how from my blackberry and we'll go from there but I've already taken them yesterday so as not to delay the journey.

@Horsedog

No doubt it would have been cool to have a workout buddy. I'll give you a shout next time I'm out that way.