Battle Kitten: Ascension

[fleaball]

36 minutes ago, Owlet said:

Hahaha maaate. Good call. Sorry about the financial aid office though, that is infuriating. Also, late classes and exams, wtf?! Is this night school? Come on! Good luck with the car issues, and the lottery.

Priorities right? Idk wtf is up with Countess' school but mine is all "70% of our grad classes are after 5pm so you can totally work while you do your degree!!1!" 

 

So my car is gonna cost $1k to fix and I'm not getting it back before the cold front hits tomorrow. :\ Brake line was leaking, which apparently broke down the fuel lines and caused those to leak, which also requires them to fix the thing they noticed in April that otherwise wouldn't have been an absolute necessity to fix at this point. I'm getting it fixed and I'm going to strongly consider selling it because it's just too much of a hassle at this point but practically everything is brand new. The best part is that when I was angsting over "do I try to get it fixed or do I just take the check from the insurance company and say goodbye to my poor car" nobody offered any advice (I know some of you guys were wary of the getting it fixed part, but my parents and my roommate and various other friends were just like "no do whatever you want") and now people are coming out of the woodwork to be like "well you should've just gotten rid of it in the first place when you had the chance." No fucking shit. Let me just hop in my time machine and get right on that.

[Countess D'If]

I gave myself the gift of a night class next semester, too. It's like having academic herpes - anytime you tell anyone they're all, "Ooooh! I'm so sorry, is there anything I can do? Soup?"

[fleaball]

1 minute ago, Countess D'If said:

I gave myself the gift of a night class next semester, too. It's like having academic herpes - anytime you tell anyone they're all, "Ooooh! I'm so sorry, is there anything I can do? Soup?"

Hahaha it really is. When you tell someone here that you're taking an 8:20 class people wince in sympathy. Ah, higher education.

[Countess D'If]

Stupid car. Like you need more drama in your life right this second. SRSLY, life - one drama at a time for the next three weeks, mmmkay?

[fleaball]

3 minutes ago, Countess D'If said:

Stupid car. Like you need more drama in your life right this second. SRSLY, life - one drama at a time for the next three weeks, mmmkay?

Honestly. And I haven't gotten around to finishing and posting my rant about dating yet but my therapist is back on the "so it's christmas break and you don't have work or school, how about meeting some people?" You mean well. I know you do. When I first started seeing you I did say I wanted to get the balls to start dating. But holy shit not now please.

[NeverThatBored]

2 hours ago, fleaball said:

Also I just remembered I have that gynecologist appointment tomorrow. I don't want to shave. :|

 

You don't have to! They do not care.

[fleaball]

1 minute ago, NeverThatBored said:

 

You don't have to! They do not care.

Haha yeah I've been reminding myself of that as the day goes on and I get increasingly lazy. I might make a halfhearted attempt. But my doctor is a man in his 60s (at least) and it's not like I'm looking to impress him so yeah. Odds are it isn't happening. Thanks for the reinforcement. 

[Countess D'If]

I met a for reals, real life nihilist today. Most challenging conversation I have ever had. 

 

I'm telling you because you would have super enjoyed the intellectual and deeply philosophical conversation.

 

Also, I've been sat drinking in a gay bar since 1:30 and I didn't pay one penny

[Sylvaa]

6 hours ago, Countess D'If said:

Also, I've been sat drinking in a gay bar since 1:30 and I didn't pay one penny

 

The real question is whether or not this occurred in pj's.

[fleaball]

11 hours ago, Countess D'If said:

I met a for reals, real life nihilist today. Most challenging conversation I have ever had. 

 

I'm telling you because you would have super enjoyed the intellectual and deeply philosophical conversation.

 

Also, I've been sat drinking in a gay bar since 1:30 and I didn't pay one penny

I approve of everything happening in this post. 

 

5 hours ago, Sylvaa said:

 

The real question is whether or not this occurred in pj's.

^ this. 

[fleaball]

Bad days that really aren't that bad but still suck are totally the worst. Was nearly late to therapy despite setting my alarm for two hours before I needed to leave because I just couldn't drag my ass out of bed. Was super keyed up because of a thing I planned on talking about that we didn't get to talking about. (Which is fine because I didn't feel prepared enough to talk about it and want to reflect on it more but I would have brought it up anyway if there were time.) Now I'm on the way to the gynecologist appointment but because my car is still getting fixed I'm taking the bus and have to kill an hour and a half at the mall which I'm very meh about. And then there's the appointment that I'm totally not looking forward to but hey. 

 

I havent been journaling per my challenge but I have it with me and plan on parking my ass at Starbucks and writing. I'm 100% sure it will help because there's just too much going on in my brain and I'm pretty sure that's why I've been feeling like a ball of anxiety for days. Ironically, I haven't been writing because there's just too much going on in my brain. Derp. 

 

Also I'm slightly cranky because I wound up saving my half-finished dating rant as a word doc on my computer but I can't finished it now because I never shoved it in my google drive.  I could rant anew, I suppose. I've got another 45 minutes on this bus...

[fleaball]

Good things:

• that was the easiest appointment I've ever been to? I don't know why people hate going so much other than the general awkward factor but it still wasn't that bad. 
• I swear I had another good thing but it's gone now.
• oh hey roommate managed to get the broken key out of the deadbolt a week later
•  

Not so good things:

• didn't get my car back today. Crossing my fingers I get it tomorrow before I have to go to campus for something because it's going to be cold af again.
• gynecologist asked if there had been any major health issues in my family since I saw him last and I mentioned my mother and he asked what caused the blood clots (no idea). and then he said they'd probably be doing a lot of tests to see if there was anything there, including cancer. And now that the seed has been planted I'm just like "fuck, what if it is cancer?" Because if it is I absolutely would not be surprised if they didn't tell me until I go home next week. (For the record, on Saturday she told me they expected to discharge her Tuesday. After seeing the results of whatever test they did Tuesday, they did not discharge her and supposedly they're looking at tomorrow, but so far she hasn't gotten back to me about how the test she had today went.) Crap, and now my brain is getting wayyyy too far ahead of me. In terms of both "it's cancer and she's going to die" and also "wtf do I do if it really is some kind of long term thing because I am not quitting school and moving home for this but that kinda makes me a terrible person?" [update: fuck. the test today was a biopsy of something. she's not giving me a lot of details. which is understandable because it's probably scary af. but also you can't tell me you're having a biopsy after spending a week in the hospital with FOUR blood clots and just brush it off like it's no big deal?]
• I forgot about my burrito when my roommate came home and I went to investigate wtf all the noise was. Poor half-eaten burrito. You were decently tasty.

 

Rant is still in progress. It's nearly 1 am and I'm forgetting how words work at this point.

 

[Sylvaa]

Liking the post due to the easy appointment, not your rant. 

 

FWIW, cancer is not a common cause of blood clots. Blood clots are more common in cancer patients, but it usually has to do with the treatment regimen than the actual cancer. Blood clots can be scary, particularly if they aren't sure what caused them. Sometimes, it might take a little bit longer to find out why. But the good news is that they are fairly easy to treat. Blood thinners and monitoring for 6-months (maybe longer if the clots were formed due to cardiac reasons).

[fleaball]

10 minutes ago, Sylvaa said:

Liking the post due to the easy appointment, not your rant. 

 

FWIW, cancer is not a common cause of blood clots. Blood clots are more common in cancer patients, but it usually has to do with the treatment regimen than the actual cancer. Blood clots can be scary, particularly if they aren't sure what caused them. Sometimes, it might take a little bit longer to find out why. But the good news is that they are fairly easy to treat. Blood thinners and monitoring for 6-months (maybe longer if the clots were formed due to cardiac reasons).

Yeah she's def already been told about the 6 month of blood thinners. I feel like I might wind up taking one of the cats to get his claws trimmed while I'm home. u.u Given my family history I think I've always assumed that if she doesn't have a heart attack first, it's going to be cancer. And it's sort of been living in the back of my mind anyway, so hearing "biopsy" was just like "oh shit here we go." 

 

I realized a long time ago that I don't expect my mother to live far into my adult life. But scratching at the reality of that is a lot different from accepting it intellectually. 

[fleaball]

Raaaaaage. I have no grades yet, no car (and no ETA on it because apparently only one guy is allowed to give that and he wasn't in the office), and I still have an ear infection after a round of antibiotics, complete with a bubble on my eardrum that may or may not rupture. 

 

It's bedtime. I'm done. 

[Countess D'If]

Bed. Netflix. Now. 

[fleaball]

1 minute ago, Countess D'If said:

Bed. Netflix. Now. 

I got 2 out of 3. Swap the Netflix for fanfic and we're good.

 

Also hey, wasn't your last final today? Did you destroy it?

[Countess D'If]

I think so. I knew at least 45% of the multiple choice answers were definitly correct

[Owlet]

Ugh sorry to hear about the health scare and lack of info. I have little add except HUGS and I hope your own health woes improve asap. And your car's health woes too. Sending healthy vibes to everyone in your general vicinity...

 

[fleaball]

I did actually get my car back last night. They called me like ten minutes after I called them. Of course. So my plan was to go grocery shopping today and maybe run some other errands, but there was freezing rain over night that's just now tapering off (was supposed to end much earlier) and the roads are a fucking mess. New plan is to clean around the house and do some reading and maybe throw my computer out the window because it's being a dick. 

 

And maybe actually hit most of my challenge goals. 

[Countess D'If]

I have to get a new tire and run to the bank

 

But I also have to clean my place - studio apartments are unforgiving of even one night of not cleaning up after your slob ass self.

 

But what I really want to do is neither of those two things. 

[fleaball]

16 minutes ago, Countess D'If said:

I have to get a new tire and run to the bank

 

But I also have to clean my place - studio apartments are unforgiving of even one night of not cleaning up after your slob ass self.

 

But what I really want to do is neither of those two things. 

I remember this from my dorm days. It's amazing how the smallest bit of clutter/mess makes a small area seem like a disaster. It's still early for you. Go knock that shit out and then enjoy your freedom.

[Countess D'If]

Trolololol, these mo fos want $70 for a 15" tire. Hahahahahahaha, no.

[fleaball]

15 minutes ago, Countess D'If said:

Trolololol, these mo fos want $70 for a 15" tire. Hahahahahahaha, no.

that's painful. D:

[Countess D'If]

I just had them put the spare on. I don't have time and I don't want to think about tires right now. I'm still too wound up. Now - home, comfy chair, Netflix