Wyrdling Posted June 12, 2014 Report Share Posted June 12, 2014 Hi,I don't know if this is the right place for it, but I need to went a bit. Yesterday I started on my four week intership as a landscape gardener (the intention being: trying it out + getting some connections and something to put on my CV for when I'd be looking for an apprenticeship later). Yesterday I was sure I wanted to be a landscape gardener. Yesterday was awesome, or nice at least. It was tough work (really tough), but the girls where nice to talk to and I seemed to fit in nicely. I also really worked and made a f* effort, so I was (am) proud of myself for that. I new I was beat when we went home, but sort of in a good way.Today, I still got up in the morning - at f* four o'clock (just like yesterday), but I had slept fitfully and my arms still hurt. After getting down from the sleeping loft my left wrist hurt. Not just the sore musles kind of hurt, but proper "ah, I should be careful about this" kind of hurt. Not a sharp pain, but clearly enough to normally make me not use it all, just to be safe. I felt like crap, too. Like I never wanted to feel the sun on my face again (I hate being overheated and I sunburn easily). I debated whether or not I should go or call in sick. It's such a dirtbag move to call in sick on the second day of work and I didn't want to loose their respect (or have them think of me as some kind of weakling). On the other hand, I knew that if I went I would end up using my hand anyway, because I wouldn't just be able to sit still and look at the others work, plus I want to be sensible and not be one of those who tells tales of "well, I should have listened to my body back then". While debating this I had sat still for a while and realised my hand didn't hurt anymore. I decided to test it by going up and down the ladder to the loft, making sure I didn't put more pressure on it than I normally would (probably less). Afterwards it hurt like hell.I called in sick.It was an awkward phonecall, but at least I told her why I wouldn't be showing up today. So no wierd lies or anything like that. I do think I have a tendency to sound worse than I am (in my tone of voice), which I don't know whether was good or bad. How does a hypocondriac sound?Now, my hand doesn't hurt (because I haven't done anything but typing and other non-weight related ordinary things like cooking a couple of eggs). I'm still sore all over in general. And I'm miserable. It feels like a guilty conscience, like I've let myself down.I don't really know what to feel about anything right now. I should probably just write this day off and allow myself to heal and relax, guilty conscience be damned! But doing so means looking forward to tomorrow and right now I am not pleased with that outlook. I don't want to get up at four o'clock, bike for forty minutes and sit in a rumbling truck for more than an hour on the freeway to work for eight hours straight in the crueling heat, doing manual physically hard labour, just to go home in the same manor I got there, being exhausted and ending up with having no more than two hours to myself at the end of the day. Why the hell do people do this?I really thought I wanted to be a landscape gardener. Right now I just wanna give up. Erica Quote Race: Troll | Class: Adventurer | Level: 2STR 1 | DEX 1 | STA 3 | CON 3 | WIS 3 | CHA 2 Quest: 1st | Current challenge: following a path"There will be glory!" - Hooded-Warrior A-buddies: RPG Fanatics Link to comment
Chillkröte Posted June 12, 2014 Report Share Posted June 12, 2014 "I also really worked and made a f* effort, so I was (am) proud of myself for that. I new I was beat when we went home, but sort of in a good way." That's why you want to continue. If you're feeling proud of yourself in the evening you're doing the right thing. I know it sounds really hard, but it will be worth it! (and it's getting better with time^^) 1 Quote "If you can still breathe, you can still fight. You are only beaten whenyou decide to!" #1: Reha! --> http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/45715-chillkr%C3%B6te-on-his-first-quest/#2: Pull Ups! --> http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/47186-chillkr%C3%B6te-round-2/#3: Consistency --> http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49693-chillkr%C3%B6te-get-your-shit-together/ Link to comment
Edigo Posted June 13, 2014 Report Share Posted June 13, 2014 How is your wrist? And i dont know what time it is at yoyr place, but did you go to day 3? Quote Level 7 Yogini green witch STR 3 - DEX 3 - STA 10 - CON 12 - WIS 13 - CHA 6 Previous challenges : 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6|| 7 || 8 || 9 || 10 || 11 Current challenge : august 2020 Mantra : I am calm, I am love Link to comment
Barfly Posted June 15, 2014 Report Share Posted June 15, 2014 It's like anything else in life. It takes time to get used to. It'd be a shame to lose out on something you might really like just because the first few times were tough 1 Quote The past is only smoke in a dream. Lvl 6 Ranger Berzerker STR 9 DEX 4 STA 9 CON 8 WIS 2 CHA 8 Barfly ain't even tryin'... Link to comment
Buff Brogan Posted June 15, 2014 Report Share Posted June 15, 2014 I really thought I wanted to be a landscape gardener. Right now I just wanna give up. Ericathat is the key.... RIGHT NOW you want to give up, but if you did, how much would you wish you hadn't? 1 Quote LEVEL: 7 Furyan Ranger - Battle Log - in lieu of this challenge don't look back, we aren't going that way: Rebirth - Wrestlemania Dark Raider vs KZacher From Tartarus with Love - Wrath of the Furyan - it's a secret! - FIGHT! - You can go your own way - The Rational Gaze - Rise from Death to Knife this Beast(part 3-the agony) - Demonized(part 2) - By Demons Be Driven(part 1) - Link to comment
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