My family luaghs at me because I want be strong

[CruiseBoxAD]

Hi, everyone

I have been back at Nerd Fitness for about week now. At first I was just doing the treadmill but it so boarding. They do have new virtual one that's kind of fun you can look at the video of a trail.  I started reading more nerd fitness realize that I need to tone up and get strong. My goal is to lift more. I want to be able to do a pull up,  and bench press at the bar. I am kind of clueless about letting weights. I am female so going into the weight room with all the musle up men kind of scary to me. 

Every time I say I want to be strong my family laughes at me. My sister in law said she could push me over with her finger. I weight 214 pounds. 

I At the start of this week I began to do the basic body workout some of it is very hard for me.  Every other day and treadmill on the other days. I love swiming so I am thanking of changing the treadmill to swimming.

 How can get them to stop laugh at me help me? 

How can I over come my fear of the weight room?

[Elastigirl]

When they do laugh at you, picture yourself in 6 months from now after you've consistently done the basic body workout and mastered it. At the point you can get down and do several pushups and prove them wrong. For that matter, in 3 months you can show them how much stronger you are getting. For right now, you can ignore them or you can look them in the eye and say" Hey, that's hurtful, stop it"  Whatever you do, don't believe them, they are wrong, you  can change. Maybe  they are scared because they think that if you can change, they have no excuses not to change too.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

2 hours ago, CruiseBoxAD said:

How can get them to stop laugh at me help me? 

You can't. You aren't in control of others. What you can do is Take Elastigirl's advice and learn to press on regardless of whether or not they laugh at you.

 

2 hours ago, CruiseBoxAD said:

How can I over come my fear of the weight room?

Slowly get used to it. At some point you have to just get in there and start lifting. There are articles from Steve's blog for beginner lifters.

[Morag]

No words can make people change how they think of you. Only actions can do that. The only way you can make them stop is to prove them wrong.

Swimming is great! It's gentle on the joints and ligaments and wonderful cardio.

About the lifting: what kinda gym do you have? The gyms here offer to make a training plan with you and show you around. When I started out I overdid things and didn't pay enough attention to good form, so I only really got into things when I was taking physical therapy sessions to repair the damage I had done to myself. Enough about me, what I'm trying to say is: I had someone in my corner. Someone who showed me the propper form and execution of new exercises and pushed me. Maybe your gym offers personal trainers who at least show you the weight area and the movements? Maybe as a defacto stranger you can even tell them the truth: you have family who is laughing at you and you want to prove them wrong.

Need to prove them wrong, for your own sake. But you need a little bit of support.

You CAN do it. Whatever you do: err on the side of "keep going" instead of "short term/quick fix".

I was a bit silly when I started out, so don't mind my silliness. But with a focus on long-term changes you can wipe their laughter off their lips and do your own thing and do it with grace. I'm at least interested to know how you do.

Do leave your comfort zone, but be kind and good to yourself when you have done it. People are too hard on each other all the time. Make sure you praise yourself for the things you do. You are on your way. The only person you should compare yourself to is yesterday's you. Improve. In your own pace.

You can do it.

---

"Travel lightly, for what you bring with you becomes part of your landscape." -Anne Bishop

[SkyGirl]

Hi CruiseBox! Welcome to the Rebellion - I'm so glad you're here!

 

Regarding being scared of the weight room, I am only 5 feet tall, so I definitely know what you mean about the big muscular men being scary!! I don't know if this is an option for you, but in my gym, we have one area with the big barbells and pull-up bars and things, and then the dumbbells are kept in another area, closer to the ellipticals - is there any kind of separate area in your gym where you would have more privacy?

 

But if not, my best piece of advice would be walk in like you own the place, because if you're paying to be there, then you do! I've only been going to the gym for about a month now, so I'm still very self-conscious and often feel like I must look ridiculous, but there are two things I've learned so far - firstly, most of the time people are deep in their own "zone" and focusing on their workout and really not paying attention to me except to get out of my way; and secondly, there are also plenty of other people who are just as unsure and nervous as I am. We're all learning and no one knows how to use every single piece of equipment at the gym proficiently. Put on your favorite motivational music and have fun exploring how to do new things!

 

Welcome again to NerdFitness! You're going to love it here!!  :-D  Let us know how your next gym visit goes!

[CruiseBoxAD]

Thanks for the advice. My gym is free because I am Native American some years ago the governor of my tribe decided that he wanted tribe members to get health. So he built gyms for them to use.  It has weight room, one class room that I discover that has free weights, kettle bells weights, yoga, boxing bags, and weight balls.  I generally just stay where the cago stuff is or go straight to the pool. But I got up my courage went in that room, no one was in there but me. So it was nice. On the other side is the actually weight room.  I could hear them but I just put myself in zone got my workout done. But on Thursday people had their kids in the room so I did my workout in the pool area they have weights in there too up to 8 lbs. So I worked out by the pool. It was hot in there I like to died, but felt good after. 

I thank they offer free training not sure. 

Maybe after a few months of doing the basic body workout I will ask them. 

I have to get me some head phones for my phone so I can play music. I brought one of those cases that go on your arm but my phone was heavy on my arm felt funny. 

My mother and I both go to gym, she wants still be able to be independent and able to walk and keep from getting diabetes,  and heart disease. She swims or walks on the treadmill.  So that kind of helps me go on my off days.  

I sometimes bite off more than I can chew. I have to keep tell myself slow and steady wins the race.  keep keep the pace. 

[SkyGirl]

You have lots of good insights so far, CruiseBox! Good job going into your zone and getting your workout done - and double-good job recognizing that you need to take small, manageable steps rather than trying to change everything at once. You're doing great!

 

Keep us posted on your next workout!

[Emerald Eagle]

This NF article really helped me when I first started: https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/embrace-the-weird/

 

Try not to hide away from being different, embrace it and make it a part of you! None of your family lift weights, well little black sheep it's time to be different and rock it. 

 

P.S. The thing I have realised since conquering the free weights section is that no one is watching. No one notices if you're lifting 200kg or just the bar. They're all there, head phones in and focused on their own workouts. Even the bros doing endless bicep curls are watching their own muscles not your weight. So get in there, get your stuff done, and don't let anyone stop you

[CruiseBoxAD]

Thanks, for the tips and suggestions. So far I been able to keep it up. Having trouble on weekends work out. Even just walking

[WolfDreamer]

You CAN do this! I can relate to the lonely pursuit of better health and fitness. I have been both mocked and scorned for making healthy choices. But you do what you know is best for you. Work your way up to becoming stronger through bodyweight exercises (especially if the gym scares you). Do some physical activity that makes you smile (or even better, makes you laugh). Dance, jump, run, skip, roll, climb, crawl, kick, punch, lift, throw whatever you can do to move and get stronger.

 

Let us know if we can help in any way.

[Miw_Sher]

Lots of good advice in here. So I'll just add that I also went through a lot of resistance from my family about my health choices, in particular dieting. I used calorie counting and the first time I tried to explain to to my sister, my mom just exploded about how, "You can't just count calories! You need nutriets as well and a balanced diet!". She is of course right, but my family already eats pretty balanced so the issue obviously was not there. Also "the problem with diets is once you stop you gain it all back! whata are you doing to do, exercise every day?"
 

Well, my sister was on it and lost weight, so now my mom and dad are on it and having results with it. They exercise every day.

So much LOL.

[Miw_Sher]

Oh, I almost forgot! What really helped me during those times is hanging around this and other fitness forums. Though this one in particular is brilliant for support. People are very non-judgemental but at the same time people are not afraid to give you honest advice. The next challenge is starting in two weeks. Start a thread in the Rebel's post and start kicking!

[CruiseBoxAD]

Thanks, looking forward to my first challenge. Do you still join one or make your own

[Mr.Six]

32 minutes ago, CruiseBoxAD said:

Do you still join one or make your own

 

I think Miw_Sher answered this to some extent...

 

8 hours ago, Miw_Sher said:

The next challenge is starting in two weeks. Start a thread in the Rebel's post and start kicking!

 

But if you have any questions about starting your first challenge, check out the amazing Walkthrough created by Spezzy and feel free to ask any of us if you have more questions.  

[Jord]

29 minutes ago, CruiseBoxAD said:

Thanks, looking forward to my first challenge. Do you still join one or make your own

 

Have you done a challenge before? Each person creates their own challenge. 

Here is info on creating a challenge: 

You post your first challenge in the Rebel section of the 4 week challenge: https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/forum/622-rebels/ 

 

But a new challenge starts every 5 weeks, so there will be a new spot to post a challenge starting next week. The above link is for the Jan 8 to Feb 4 challenge. Next week look for the new "Rebel" challenge section here: https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/forum/251-4-week-challenges/ 

 

Let us know if you have questions! 

 

I am a member of the Warrior guild (focused on strength) and you do not have to be already strong to join us! It's recommended that your first challenge be with the Rebels to learn the ropes, and then your second challenge can be with the Warriors. 

[CruiseBoxAD]

Thanks, for information. I have not done a challenge. When I first joined NF in 2014 I was working on a challenge and had almost finished it, when end up in the hospital with a appendices and had Completion. I didn't have the guts to come back until a few weeks ago. I am now ready to try again.

The doctor did say to take things slow with weight training.

 

[Raincloak]

If you like walking on a treadmill with a virtual trail in front of you, imagine how much more fun it is to walk outside.

[Jord]

13 hours ago, CruiseBoxAD said:

Thanks, for information. I have not done a challenge. When I first joined NF in 2014 I was working on a challenge and had almost finished it, when end up in the hospital with a appendices and had Completion. I didn't have the guts to come back until a few weeks ago. I am now ready to try again.

The doctor did say to take things slow with weight training.

 

 

Definitely follow doctors orders. I have a million medical issues and do powerlifting but I make sure my doc knows what I am up to and knows what diet I'm following. Lifting weights has been he best thing for my health. 

[CruiseBoxAD]

Thanks, I will follow his orders. I have new doctor he said that wheat and some grains could cause some of my allergies. That's why I don't walk outside because in the last few years my allergies have gotten so bad. I am working on cutting out wheat to see if it helps. The doctor said I had a weak abdomen and it would be good to work on making it stronger. That I probably could do weight training if I did it right and did not work at it everyday.