fleaball Posted March 13, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 13, 2017 21 minutes ago, Owlet said: ughhh. That sounds like a whole lot of unpleasant and unnecessary. Yeahhhh it really is. I am not pleased. 1 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 13, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 13, 2017 4 am. nurse just came in with the discharge paperwork. I have to be awake at 6 to shower before we come back for chemo. Kill me. 1 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
Owlet Posted March 13, 2017 Report Share Posted March 13, 2017 Dude this is not cool You are going to need a lot of coffee tomorrow and many cat naps. Hugs 2 Quote Current Challenge Link to comment
Sylvaa Posted March 13, 2017 Report Share Posted March 13, 2017 3 hours ago, fleaball said: 4 am. nurse just came in with the discharge paperwork. I have to be awake at 6 to shower before we come back for chemo. Kill me. You can do it! Take a nap while chemo is going on if you can. All the hugs! 2 Quote Sylvaa's BattleLog Sylvaa's Tracking Spreadsheet Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 14, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 14, 2017 I hate it here and I want to go home. 1 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
NeverThatBored Posted March 14, 2017 Report Share Posted March 14, 2017 Just now, fleaball said: I hate it here and I want to go home. You will soon enough. Hang in there! Can you get away for a little bit? 2 Quote Gargoyle Ranger | Level 49 2022 challenges: 49 (current) 2015-2021 challenges: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 || 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 || 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 || 43 | 44 | 45 | | 46 | 47 | 48 || My epic quest | MEATBALL WARS You don't get better at anything unless you start doing it. Being alive is heckn swell. Link to comment
Sylvaa Posted March 14, 2017 Report Share Posted March 14, 2017 4 minutes ago, fleaball said: I hate it here and I want to go home. Warm thoughts and I love you darling. 2 Quote Sylvaa's BattleLog Sylvaa's Tracking Spreadsheet Link to comment
Severine Posted March 14, 2017 Report Share Posted March 14, 2017 I'm sorry to hear things are not going well Life is being such an asshole to you right now. You're strong and you'll get through it but I wish you didn't have to. Did your mum get chemo? If there's anything we can do, say so. We're your backup squad. 3 Quote Fitbit | Current Challenge | Old Challenges: 1 ~ 2 ~ 3 ~ 4 ~ 5 ~ 6 ~ 7 ~ 8 ~ 9 ~ 10 ~ 11 ~ 12 ~ 13 ~ 14 ~ 15 ~ 16 ~ 17 ~ 18 ~ 19 ~ 20 ~ 21 ~ 22 Forum avatar is custom art by the talented Veronica Guzzardi. Link to comment
Plazmotic Posted March 14, 2017 Report Share Posted March 14, 2017 12 hours ago, fleaball said: I hate it here and I want to go home. Hang in there! 3 Quote Introduction thread: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/74498-new-beginnings/Epic Quests: https://www.nerdfitness.com/level-up/my-epic-quest/Current Challenge: https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/106290-plazmotic-unlearns-what-she-has-learned/ Daily Battle Log: 1 | https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/106756-in-space-no-one-can-hear-plazmotic-scream/ Previous Challenges: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 15, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2017 Thanks all. <3 Yesterday I was extra mopey after getting ONE hour of sleep after our adventures at the ER. (He has the fucking flu.) Being in this environment (both the house and the people) is not good for me. Plus my shoulder is seriously acting up for no apparent reason and ibuprofen is doing nothing for it. On 3/13/2017 at 10:27 PM, NeverThatBored said: Can you get away for a little bit? Noooope. Blizzard today. My mother's car is dying and I don't feel safe driving it. And really there's nowhere here I feel like going. I'm supposed to make dinner plans with a friend but I'm gonna beg off because honestly she kinda drives me crazy and I just can't handle her rn. On 3/13/2017 at 10:35 PM, Severine said: Did your mum get chemo? She did! Everything went well, her scans last week show the cancer is stable and not growing. All good news. And we can start looking at hotels and flights and stuff for graduation (with travel insurance just in case). 7 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
Sylvaa Posted March 15, 2017 Report Share Posted March 15, 2017 1 minute ago, fleaball said: Noooope. Blizzard today. My mother's car is dying and I don't feel safe driving it. And really there's nowhere here I feel like going. I'm supposed to make dinner plans with a friend but I'm gonna beg off because honestly she kinda drives me crazy and I just can't handle her rn. I'd like to clarify - this friend is not me. 5 Quote Sylvaa's BattleLog Sylvaa's Tracking Spreadsheet Link to comment
Severine Posted March 15, 2017 Report Share Posted March 15, 2017 1 hour ago, fleaball said: I'm supposed to make dinner plans with a friend but I'm gonna beg off because honestly she kinda drives me crazy and I just can't handle her rn. 1 hour ago, Sylvaa said: I'd like to clarify - this friend is not me. Or me!! 3 Quote Fitbit | Current Challenge | Old Challenges: 1 ~ 2 ~ 3 ~ 4 ~ 5 ~ 6 ~ 7 ~ 8 ~ 9 ~ 10 ~ 11 ~ 12 ~ 13 ~ 14 ~ 15 ~ 16 ~ 17 ~ 18 ~ 19 ~ 20 ~ 21 ~ 22 Forum avatar is custom art by the talented Veronica Guzzardi. Link to comment
Countess D'If Posted March 15, 2017 Report Share Posted March 15, 2017 Hi, friend. All caught up. I think you need to just go live alone in the woods with no people around to be assholes to you. We all here can come visit. But you need like a year off from other humans. *Hugs* 1 Quote My Blog | To-Read | @i_ate_the_bar | fitbit Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 17, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 I live. I really just hate being home. Especially right now. She's more or less okay and everything is stable, but I feel guilty if I'm not hanging out with her. So I've done zero homework so far and am completely fucked. And then I also get frustrated because "hanging out" mostly entails sitting around watching NCIS reruns and I'm just so... argh. Theoretically I could duck out to Starbucks or somewhere for a bit but then I'd feel guilty for not being at home. And I find going out for the sake of going out pointless so I'd be frustrated there too. On top of that, my brother is obnoxious and I just want him to disappear and I'm trying to be more patient with my father but he's really wearing me down and I am just so ready to be gone. And yet if I hadn't come here for the entire week I'd be sitting in DC right now feeling guilty for not being here. Yes I'm getting stuff done for them that's giving me peace of mind and I'm sure they appreciate but it's not really enough for me to not feel frustrated with the entire situation. This is really just not a good environment for me to be in. The people aren't good for me, the physical environment is terrible because the house is a fucking disaster area but I get yelled at if I try to straighten up too. I'm just counting down until I leave on Saturday but I feel really bad about that too. There's just a no-win situation here. I was really looking forward to watching Supernatural this week but it's not on til the 30th. Figures. 4 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
Countess D'If Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 2 hours ago, fleaball said: I was really looking forward to watching Supernatural this week but it's not on til the 30th. Figures. Ugh. bEEtches!!! *Hugs* It'll be OK 1 Quote My Blog | To-Read | @i_ate_the_bar | fitbit Link to comment
Dagger Posted March 17, 2017 Report Share Posted March 17, 2017 Sounds rough. *hugs* 2 Quote Introduction (where I started, May 2016) ~*~ NF Character (dormant) Progress as a Nomad: Battle log where I do my own challenges Useful posts on my battle log: Useful Links and Travel Schedule, Future Challenge Ideas, Goals for 2017 as a whole, Assorted Goals (not on rotation), Elements W1D1, Last Quarter Goals Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 19, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 19, 2017 I'm home. This bitch's shit is still here. I was gonna do homework but instead I think I'm gonna go do all the crying I didn't do this week. 5 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
Dagger Posted March 19, 2017 Report Share Posted March 19, 2017 1 Quote Introduction (where I started, May 2016) ~*~ NF Character (dormant) Progress as a Nomad: Battle log where I do my own challenges Useful posts on my battle log: Useful Links and Travel Schedule, Future Challenge Ideas, Goals for 2017 as a whole, Assorted Goals (not on rotation), Elements W1D1, Last Quarter Goals Link to comment
Briniel Posted March 19, 2017 Report Share Posted March 19, 2017 Oh wow, just caught up, I'm so sorry, this sounds so shitty. Glad you're back home, sorry that it's still a mess. Sending all the hugs/fistbumps you want. 2 Quote "The way you spend your days is the way you live your life" Challenges: Current | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1 Link to comment
Owlet Posted March 19, 2017 Report Share Posted March 19, 2017 Ugh. Can I suggest you do all your crying on her shit so it gets all wet? Haha that is so weird. In all seriousness though, I'm sorry going home was so challenging, that sounds really hard. Well done for doing it though. Like you said, if you hadn't gone you would've still felt bad. At least this way you know you tried. Hope you feel better soon, hugs <3 2 Quote Current Challenge Link to comment
Jarric Posted March 20, 2017 Report Share Posted March 20, 2017 9 hours ago, Owlet said: In all seriousness though, I'm sorry going home was so challenging, that sounds really hard. Well done for doing it though. Like you said, if you hadn't gone you would've still felt bad. At least this way you know you tried. Hope you feel better soon, hugs <3 ^ Just wanted to echo this - you did the right thing in going home and well done for doing it. *hugs* 2 Quote Level 21 Wood Elf Ranger STR: 18 - CON: 22 - CHA: 11 - SAN: 19 - INT: 17 IAgreeWithTank™ "Shit is going down, but I am not." - iatetheyeti Don't say "I don't have enough time", say instead "that's not a priority right now" and see how that makes you feel. Current Challenge: Get going! External: Epic Quest - Instagram - Strava Spoiler Previous Challenges: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 Old Stuff: Battle Log - My Introduction - 2017 Road Map - 2018 Road Map - 2019 Road Map - 2021 Road Map - 2022 road map/wrap-up Link to comment
fleaball Posted March 24, 2017 Author Report Share Posted March 24, 2017 New record today: cried in the waiting room of my therapist's office before the appointment even started. Idk what I was thinking about but I think it was something related to having to order graduation robes next week and I don't have time to lose all the weight I wanted to lose for it and then "mom will never see me be pretty again." Okay, what the actual fuck? So I don't know now if I'm crying because my mother is dying or because I'm unhappy with my weight and will still be unhappy come photo time or just because it's a day that ends in Y. Didn't have time to bring it up with my therapist because there were more important things we needed to unpack but lol what. Okay brain. You do you. Feeling better about life in general at this point. Still stressed as hell but the distance from last week plus the unexpected PMS being over has helped make it manageable. And hey, we finally got my data on Tuesday! Still gonna see if she'll give me an extension because I am 0% confident I can get it done well by the end of the semester. Like, if it has to get done it will get done. But my complete first draft is supposed to be done by April 17th? Even if I were on top of my lit review, I don't think that's enough time to run the statistics and analyze it while also working full-time and having two other classes. We'll see what happens at the meeting on Monday. I need to spend like every free minute this weekend working on the lit review so I can pretend I'm on track, but I think I'll be okay. I've lost 3 pounds in 3 weeks. Wouldn't be surprised if I gain some of it back because this week has been kind of a disaster but I'm kinda pleased that I've been trending downward for a bit. Still need to come up with a system or solid rotation of recipes for lunches and dinners during the week but the little things have been helping so far. Huzzah. Still dont have the brainspace to make the rounds and check in on people. I don't like it because I miss you crazy kids. 6 Quote Level 69 Battle Kitten Battle Log | Current Challenge MyFitnessPal | Fitbit | Duolingo Ici je vis la vie que j'ai choisie Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie C'est dit, c'est ainsi Link to comment
lynneta Posted March 24, 2017 Report Share Posted March 24, 2017 Don't worry about checking in on people take care of you.we're not going anywhere. I.was caregiver to.my dad until.he passed.Its hard losing a parent. Glad you went.home to.see your mom.even though it sounds like a hard situation .you know that you.put in the effort to be there. Im.now caregiver to my.mom.multiple strokes. Your a beautiful girl and im sure your mom thinks so.too. Its hard when our parents become ill .allow yourself to feel the emotions.you don't have to be strong.if you need to.talk I.kmow we dont.know each other but im here. Hugsss 1 Quote https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/95942-the-phoenix-risestime-to-finish-what-i-started/&page=2https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/95969-the-rise-of-the-phoenix/ Link to comment
Dagger Posted March 24, 2017 Report Share Posted March 24, 2017 12 hours ago, fleaball said: Okay brain. You do you. Sometimes that is all we can say, isn't it? I'm glad you are feeling better. Take the time you need. We won't disappear. Yes, we've missed you, but we'd rather you be happy than anything else. Or happier. Whatever, you know what I mean. <3 2 Quote Introduction (where I started, May 2016) ~*~ NF Character (dormant) Progress as a Nomad: Battle log where I do my own challenges Useful posts on my battle log: Useful Links and Travel Schedule, Future Challenge Ideas, Goals for 2017 as a whole, Assorted Goals (not on rotation), Elements W1D1, Last Quarter Goals Link to comment
Briniel Posted March 24, 2017 Report Share Posted March 24, 2017 Ah, flea... hang in there. I really don't know what else to say (can I just copy what lynetta and dagger said?), but we're here and rooting for you. 3 Quote "The way you spend your days is the way you live your life" Challenges: Current | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1 Link to comment
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