Snarkyfishguts: DBL

[Snarkyfishguts]

Okay, so at dinner, Bert turns to me and said "I forgot that you like to go to bed at 10:30. If I'm playing games with my friends, I'll take it downstairs so it won't bother anyone and I can play later!" and I said "That's a great solution!"  He also has put down all the toilet seats today and turned off lights when he leaves a room. Even if I'm still in it. LOL. 

 

He is trying, and I do appreciate that. I also appreciate that he found a solution.  I also said "I'm not mad at you Bert, because you didn't know, and I realize I need to communicate better." and he said "Yeah, that would be nice" so it was a really good chat.  So he sounds good now, and I think we can move forward together.  One of the things I like about Bert is we can have these conversations and it's not combative. So tonight when we ordered pizza I said okay to gross green peppers and he suggested we just get green peppers on half of it since I didn't like them.  I was like "Oh, I should've thought of that" and he said "to be fair, you're pretty tired."  I did say "I noticed the toilet seats are down, and I appreciate that." and he said "I know. I'm trying to remember." and I said "no one wants to pick Pap out of a toilet" and he laughed and said "No!"  I asked him if anything bothered him, and he said "No, I'm really happy to be here. It's so much nicer than the dorms" and I just smiled and said "If something comes up, lemme know. We'll find a solution together" 

 

So we're good. I was frustrated earlier, but it turns out I just needed to give him a little more time.  I need to work on my patience and critical mindset. I also need a good night's sleep. I'm so tired, and I said so, and then I said "It's not you. I'm just having trouble sleeping. I get too hot sometimes." And he said "Try closing your blinds, your room won't get so hot." and I'm like "Oh THAT'S why your blinds are closed" and he smiled and said "Yeah!"

 

sigh. I'm going to read a book and go to bed. 

[Snarkyfishguts]

And we're back to square one with Bert. It's like nothing we talked about yesterday stayed with him. I just looked around and thought "Wow, I thought that would last at least a couple days."   I didn't remind him about it today. I'm tired and a little sad today so I kept to myself.

 

Things that went well today are:

 I exercised and got some yard work done. We'll need more flowers for the fall. We're thinking mums. Lots of mums!

I played the ukulele a bit. I really enjoyed that!

I talked to my cousin and she made me laugh. 

I focused on taking care of myself instead of focusing on problems.  It was really effective. 

 

 

Tomorrow a plumber is coming to check a slow leak in the basement ceiling. Fingers crossed it's an easy fix.  I can't tell where the leak is, but I'll let you know how it goes!   Have a good night!

[ReturnOfTheDad]

38 minutes ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

focused on taking care of myself instead of focusing on problems.  It was really effective. 

Good for you! ??

[TimovieMan]

On 9/2/2024 at 2:41 AM, Snarkyfishguts said:

He is trying, and I do appreciate that. I also appreciate that he found a solution.  I also said "I'm not mad at you Bert, because you didn't know, and I realize I need to communicate better." and he said "Yeah, that would be nice" so it was a really good chat.  So he sounds good now, and I think we can move forward together.  One of the things I like about Bert is we can have these conversations and it's not combative.

11 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

And we're back to square one with Bert. It's like nothing we talked about yesterday stayed with him. I just looked around and thought "Wow, I thought that would last at least a couple days."   I didn't remind him about it today. I'm tired and a little sad today so I kept to myself.

Those are pretty jarring to read back-to-back. ?

[Snarkyfishguts]

13 hours ago, ReturnOfTheDad said:

Good for you! ??

Thanks! I'm going to keep doing this work for a while.

 

2 hours ago, TimovieMan said:

Those are pretty jarring to read back-to-back. ?

Ugh, right?  He's not doing it on purpose though. I just think it's going to take a lot more work and time with this kiddo.  

 

I stress-cleaned today and that was good. 

 

OH! We don't have a plumbing problem. The plumber thinks that our gutter guards have debris on them and need to be cleaned so water flows properly off the roof. He also suspects we need to recaulk around the vent that leads outside where the leak shows up.   Mom is happy that no one is ripping out her cabinets LOL

[Shello]

That sounds fairly typical for that age group.  Building new habits is hard work!   We know all about that.  

 

I like your approach tp focus on the positive.  Sorry there's just so much to deal with right now.  <4

 

 

[Snarkyfishguts]

2 hours ago, Shello said:

That sounds fairly typical for that age group.  Building new habits is hard work!   We know all about that.  

You're so right on both counts!  

 

 

2 hours ago, Shello said:

I like your approach tp focus on the positive.  Sorry there's just so much to deal with right now.  <4

Thanks. I appreciate it. <4

[RES]

On 9/3/2024 at 11:16 AM, Snarkyfishguts said:

OH! We don't have a plumbing problem. The plumber thinks that our gutter guards have debris on them and need to be cleaned so water flows properly off the roof. He also suspects we need to recaulk around the vent that leads outside where the leak shows up.   Mom is happy that no one is ripping out her cabinets LOL

That's great news!!

 

 

[Snarkyfishguts]

2 hours ago, RES said:

That's great news!!

 

 

Right? So exciting! The gutter guys came out and cleaned out the gutters and said "I don't think it's a gutter issue!"  So the next step is to call the roof guys and have them come out to inspect the roof.  It's like a mystery! Luckily the leak seems to be connected to outside the house so it's not leaking currently, but we definitely want to fix it before winter.  Fingers crossed the roof guys find the problem and fix it because after that we're kinda like "What next?"

[Snarkyfishguts]

 Okay, LET'S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS (to defeat the Huns). Oh gosh that song is gonna be stuck in my head ALL DAY NOW.  Let's just share that here so we can all sing it together.

 

 

 

Yeah okay. Did you sing along? I absolutely did. 

 

 

There was a point to this post... I dont' remember it now. Have a good day!

 

 

[Shello]

That song is son our road trip playlist.  I might have to listen to it on the way home from work today. 

[Snarkyfishguts]

2 hours ago, Shello said:

That song is son our road trip playlist.  I might have to listen to it on the way home from work today. 

It's so catchy!!!!

[Snarkyfishguts]

This challenge seems to have arrived at the right time  

 

 

 

 

I learned the visiting uncle is coming Thursday-Sunday.  If I'm lucky, I will only have to really deal with him on Saturday. We won't spend a lot of time on him here unless he does something and it's a really good story. Let's assume he'll be stinky, gross, and whiny.  

 

Bert went home this weekend and will be back tomorrow night. He and my brother drive to school together and they seem to really enjoy the drive, and my brother likes getting his school work done at the library where there are fewer distractions than at home. Overall, this seems like it's working well for them. My dad seems to enjoy having them around more and we all do, really. I don't know why the whole Bert situation bothers me as much as it does, but I think that's something I can work out over time, or just let go. Right now I'm leaning towards just letting it go. The answer will come back eventually.