[Teros]

I'm continuing the last challenge idea, but I need to iron out a few things regarding it.  I'll post the original spreadsheet:

 

Based on the timeline since I started this last challenge, I should be on week 5/6.  Some things I need to take into account and tweak though:

 

1) I'm in a therapy study (so I'll be getting a couple hundred bucks for participating) and I'm taking it serious and the study is based on Behavioral Activation.  In a nutshell:

 

CBT/Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: Focus on Thoughts/feelings/mood --> Improve and therefore do more things

Behavioral Activation: Do more things --> Improves thoughts/feelings/mood

 

One goes from A-->B, while the other is B--> A.

 

Every week (for 8 weeks), I'm supposed to be logging what I do every single hour and then rating things on how important they are and how fun they are. The intended idea is to look at the *shitty* scoring things and replace them with *awesome* things.  Now, I'll probably write a more in-depth post about this whole experience, but it's honestly causing me to go from depressed to anxious with how much shit I have to do.  I.e. I have 5 OTHER things I'm trying to slow add while also adding the above weekly chart.  I need to merge these together and not feel overwhelmed.  One of the things on my therapy list is spending time with my sister. Problem is, I'm spending too much time with her and then I end up eating junk food so I fucked up the whole30 so I'm restarting again.

 

2) A lot of my time the past two weeks has been trying to help ladyfriend with her parent's house. I'm spending hours on the weekend and now multiple evenings trying to help her clean out this goddamn house.  Thing is, after all the hauling crap up and down stairs, I'm exhausted and in a lot of pain.  That means time and effort gets cut elsewhere and like I said, I'm already trying to do my NF list and the therapy list.

 

3) I have quite possibly the worst case of athlete's foot in history.  Either that or I have some sort of undetermined condition. I thought I was itchy on my feet and legs. Well, I have

...

*checks*

...

I have 12 different deep wound/scratch/scabs on my legs. I didn't think athlete's foot could be on legs, but apparently if the atmosphere is right for a little bit, it can take hold and then spread.  We had some 90 degree days and I have to wear pants for work and I remember sweat pouring down my legs.  A couple days later, I'm all red blotchy skin and itchy.  Didn't matter I was using a loofah or brush to scrub my legs - it kept getting worse and worse.  I'm now on week three of using athlete's foot spray and also spraying my legs and scrubbing them twice a day.  The LAST thing I should be doing is going to the gym and making this even worse and the scrubbing, drying, spraying, and socking of everything takes entirely too long.  Another time sink when you add the hauling/cleaning and the subsequent inability to walk standing up because of how bad my back is afterwards.

 

Needless to say, I'm busting my fucking ass right now but it sure as hell doesn't show like that on NF.  As much as I wanted to keep going with the conversation in my last thread (which I'll be replying to stuff), I'm also sweating, trying not to gouge my legs and feet open, have insane hip/back pain, and all this is taking a toll on my energy/sleep so I feel like I'm on fumes again.

 

So, with all that explained, the above chart is what I was working on, but I intend to draft up an updated version that reflects what's going on.  I just wanted to get this post out now so when the challenge officially starts on Monday, I can post.  Although I will also say that on Monday, after work I am going to the dr to hopefully get medication to deal with the feet/legs, and I also have a job interview.

 

Also!  I need new music.  I require fav workout or cleanning-at-home songs because once this shit with my feet and legs is cleared, I want to put a bunch of new shit on my ipod for the gym.  I'll start.  I've had this song in my head for a week:

 

 

[RES]

Following along, (of course) good luck at the doctors, that does sound like something more going on. 

Logging every hour, that sounds nightmarish to me, what if you're just doing something basic, like working?

 

[Snarkyfishguts]

I agree with RES about the hourly check ins. Too much reflection makes me Batman levels of brooding. Not fun Batman either. Is this assigned to you or self- designated?

fun batman gif. 

[Teros]

On 9/7/2024 at 9:11 AM, RES said:

Logging every hour, that sounds nightmarish to me, what if you're just doing something basic, like working?

+

On 9/8/2024 at 7:22 PM, Snarkyfishguts said:

I agree with RES about the hourly check ins. Too much reflection makes me Batman levels of brooding. Not fun Batman either. Is this assigned to you or self- designated?

 

It's part of the therapy program.  If you are doing the same thing for multiple hours in a row you can just write that.  Example would be:

 

9am-3pm Work (10/0) 

4pm-6pm Movie (8/4)

 

That means I worked from 9 to 3 and it was extremely important for a 10, but I hate the job so it's a 0 on the fun. Afterwards I saw a movie and the movie was important for mental health relaxing, but it was kind of a shitty movie that I enjoyed a little bit, so that's only a 4.  You write all this down for the whole week and then see how often you do important stuff versus how often you do fun stuff.  Best of both worlds is ideal, like a job you love or reading a book that was informative and interesting, but usually you're going to get a lot of (10-0) or (0-10).  If you are always doing important stuff, but not fun stuff (gotta work and then do laundry and then cook and then...) then it can be plain to see why someone would be depressed since it seems like life is a never-ending chore of bullshit.  But the opposite can be true.  If the day is (ate brownies, then smoked pot, then played videogames...) then do you feel fulfilled in life or are you just ruminating and doing things in a desperate attempt to feel better?  Behavioral Activation forces you to asses how much of your life is important or fun, and what can be done to swap out things to make life better. If you score low on both (like me with Youtube which might be a 3-3) then it makes sense to just get rid of that time-waster and either do something more important (reading) or more fun (painting).

 

----

 

 

So I intended to re-write what the challenge breakdown is but there might be a very big change coming.  I went to a spur of the moment job fair for a place I wanted to get my internship. It was a 2 hour block they had.  I talked to a guy for 45 minutes.  He was thrilled.  I explained my current situation and he talked about full time positions, fee-for-service contract work, and I told him about part time. That wasn't even an option but fuck it: I have two years of internships working with this EXACT population. I have a wide range of modalities I pull from.  He was impressed with all of my answers.  He's looking forward to me getting my LICSW which I'm like 3/4 of the way to and if I get hired, that will expedite the process and I could have my LICSW license even sooner in like a couple months and then re-assess a full-time position.  He legit said, 'You know what? We don't have a part time position but let me talk to some people'.  He seemed really interested and he said he would talk to HR/Finance department and let me know by Monday.  So for all I know, I might have a new job in  just 4 days which will change my timeline dramatically.

 

Basically, we came out of the conversation with him knowing I wanted a part time 20-ish hour position and lead to a full time 'upgrade'.  If that's not doable, then a fee-for-service position in order to get clients for roughly the same amount of hours (but would take longer to fill up my client-list). While it sounds like it's basically the same thing: I work Mon/Tues/Wed for 8 hours each, meaning 24 hours/week; there are differences:

Part-Time: I get paid no matter what for the 24 hours.  If 3 people cancel, I'm still there and I still get some $.   W2 taxes, which means less taken out. Medical benefits.

Fee-For-Service: I get paid only when clients show up, although he made it seems like that might be negotiable. 1099 taxes, which means more is taken out but I would advocate for being paid more if so. No medical.

 

The clear better option is part-time so that's what I'm pushing for.  However, I even told him that if they wanted to pay a little less per hour but keep the guaranteed part-time hours,  I would be fine with that.  I mean, math-wise, that's still better.

 

Let's say Part time is $43/hour.  Guaranteed 24 hours = $1,032

Fee-For-Service is $43/hour.  Not guaranteed 24 hours. I'd have 1/3 being cancelled so it's more like 16 hoursx43= $688  (plus more taken out for taxes)

 

Since I'm advocating for taking less money but being part-time, if I even did:

Part time is $35/hour.  Guaranteed 24 hours = $840 (less taken out for taxes)

 

Fingers crossed he makes this work because if so, SO MANY THINGS change.  I'll actually be making good money when I factor in the other jobs. I'll quit the supermarket. I'll be getting my license hours faster which means I can get the next certification.  Then that means I can quit even more of these jobs and then just have ONE job which is going to be so much better for my mental health and if that's the case, I get perks like non-shitty healthcare and the license upgrade will mean I make more money so it's a domino effect that means I'll be kicking serious ass in like 6 months.   The extra money means I can start doing home renovations and that will kick-start improving the house market's value and I'll also be able to have some money to fund other hobbies that I keep putting off because I'm poor.  It's a serious game-changer if this works.

 

 

[Elastigirl]

I hope the job works out for you!

[Artemis Prime]

Fingers crossed for you!

[RES]

??

[DarK_RaideR]

12 hours ago, Teros said:

You write all this down for the whole week and then see how often you do important stuff versus how often you do fun stuff.  Best of both worlds is ideal, like a job you love or reading a book that was informative and interesting, but usually you're going to get a lot of (10-0) or (0-10).  If you are always doing important stuff, but not fun stuff (gotta work and then do laundry and then cook and then...) then it can be plain to see why someone would be depressed since it seems like life is a never-ending chore of bullshit.  But the opposite can be true.  If the day is (ate brownies, then smoked pot, then played videogames...) then do you feel fulfilled in life or are you just ruminating and doing things in a desperate attempt to feel better?  Behavioral Activation forces you to asses how much of your life is important or fun, and what can be done to swap out things to make life better. If you score low on both (like me with Youtube which might be a 3-3) then it makes sense to just get rid of that time-waster and either do something more important (reading) or more fun (painting).

That actualy makes a lot of sense. I've been guilty of sticking with a lot of 10-0s, even on weekends, to the point where I decided I need to cut myself some slack and have some fun. Some stuff that scored low on both ends, mainly time wasters like social media, I've gotten rid of. This is a very interesting way of seeing things and assessing what it is you're actually doing throughout the day.

 

Fingers crossed on the job front, wishing you good luck!

[Teros]

4 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

That actualy makes a lot of sense. I've been guilty of sticking with a lot of 10-0s, even on weekends, to the point where I decided I need to cut myself some slack and have some fun. Some stuff that scored low on both ends, mainly time wasters like social media, I've gotten rid of. This is a very interesting way of seeing things and assessing what it is you're actually doing throughout the day.

 

Fingers crossed on the job front, wishing you good luck!

Here dude. (hope this attaches)  A free $150 session/lesson.  I literally made this for a client, because *as* I'm learning about Behavioral Activation as a client, I'm understanding it's usage and working on being able to use it for my clients as well. It's just a simple excel-style table:

 

 

[Teros]

So I recently found out about a something called the 'Fermi Paradox' which talks about aliens and the different theories that there are for why we aren't chatting it up with space-babes.  The options as actually pretty horrifying.  I've been thinking about this for a few days so I wanted to write something up about it.

 

If life takes certain stipulations, then shouldn't there be more of it, just on a probability scale based on the sheer incomprehensible amount of options in the galaxy? There are billions of stars and there are age ranges of them.  It's not like everything showed up right at the exact same second.  There are possibilities out there where there were millions of extra years a species could be ahead of us.  Compare society today to caveman standards - shouldn't there be, based on probability alone, at least some other forms of life out there?

 

There are a few reasons that have been proposed as to why we seem to be alone (barring blurry gray footage of things that can be shit like hot air balloons, jets in the sky, and a myriad of other things).

 

1) The Great Filter - This is somewhat reductionist, I feel.  It's basically saying that the probability really is THAT low.  That there are so many factors that even came up to create bio-genesis and going from procaryotic to eucaryotic (shit I spelled that right first try) cells (multi-cellular organisms) that this run-away form of evolution is pretty much impossible.  We have, through chance, bounded over every evolutionary hurdle to have this amazing breadth of biodiversity which then had an even smaller probability to create *us*.

 

Ok, that's fine.  Just really rare.  But honestly, does that really seem possible?  I mean we're talking numbers we can't even comprehend in terms of available options.  It's not like 1 out of 100.  People who believe in the Great Filter are saying 1 in  trillions and trillions of possible options, we are the only exception?  I also feel like this is very simplistic thinking.  When I think of life and death and chemistry, I think of a chain of events that create reactions. Sort of like....when does life start?  Like we are life.  But isn't a dog?  Isn't a tree? Keep reducing, isn't mold?  At what point does 'chemical reaction' turn into 'life'?  If there is no consciousness, but just a series of chemical events, can't mold be considered that, as it just grows in the direction of it's fuel source?  How isn't that the same as, say, a wildfire just blazing a fire through a fuel source?  Does *intent* equal life?  Because then tell me how mold and a tree are separated in this regard?

 

The whole point I'm making is that The Great Filter idea seems very narrowed in its way of classifying life.  If life is a mind-boggling set of chemical reactions, then couldn't there be liquid mercury-based 'life' hat we just aren't looking for or are assuming isn't life when we see blurred pictures from other planets?  Couldn't you use a different building block and with enough overlapping reactions, be able to classify a 'life'?  I mean, it's not like the sodium-potassium action potential is cognitively aware of what it is doing, is it?

 

This is literally how action potentials get fired off and cells 'communicate' but in a reductionist perspective, none of these things are more than chemical impulses that are set to fire off additional chemical impulses.  I mean, is photosynthesis life? It's part of life and it's important for plants but is that chemical reaction 'life' or are there just so many of these co-occurring reactions that we mislabel life and that there really is no distinction between life, death, and chemistry except complexity?

 

2) Grabby Aliens (aka Quiet and Loud Aliens) - The proposal is in a pdf here and it's like 30 pages: http://arxiv.org/pdf/2102.01522  

The basic idea is that at some point, a species will become 'grabby', as in, will start to expand outside their original realm of influence.  Equate that to the mold example I gave above:  The life moves outside and continues to go towards a fuel source.  In our case, we realize we need more space because of how high the population is, or that we need other precious minerals/fuel that is dwindling here.  Rather than run out of resources and die, we will eventually become grabby and start expanding.  And that premise is how any alien life may work: at some point, aliens aren't content with *only* a planet, but venture further.

 

This piggybacks off of #1 probability. Maybe humanity is just early?  Maybe there is a good probability of other aliens, but those hurdles that make a habitable atmosphere, to change into multicellular organisms, to build upon that foundation might mean that we just happen to be the first in the great timeline of the cosmos, but we certainly won't be the last.  In a thousand years from now, there might be the hurdle from habitat to multicellular organisms thousands of light-years away.  Or hell, maybe if you think of humanity as a simple organism (compared to what we can evolve into), maybe we reach out to other planets and *we* are like the first version of a mold and we are the first mitochondria of all other aliens.  Maybe we are the *starter template* that aliens 20 billion years from now will look back on and see that their evolutionary tree all comes back to *us*.  I mean, wouldn't the first creature to get out of the primordial soup of the ocean think it's alone?  There's also the fact that all these probabilities take time and if given the right conditions, it would be easier to develop life on some planets, while others will take longer.  We just happen to be the earliest probability because Earth was the most habitable in the cosmos' great timeline but in the future, there will be things like changes in atmosphere, cooling or warming, changes in chemical composition, asteroids colliding to change the trajectory of planets, etc etc.

 

So if we're early, then will there be aliens in the future?  Well, maybe not.  Because let's say we expand to 10 thousand planets and colonize them.  That's 10 thousand LESS planets that can have the chance to go through this evolution and therefore will not create aliens.  We're already there.  We took the resources.  There's no growth potential. And the more we expand, the less % chance there is of there being alien life generated just by the fact we take more and more cosmic real estate.  This *also* means that if we are really really really far away from other 'grabby' aliens, that eventually as we (and they) expand, we will find each other, but if we're early and colonize quickly, there will never be aliens because of us.  This also means *IF* we find aliens as we are expanding/being grabby, it's safe to say they have also come to a similar conclusion which would mean they also will find us and are competing for resources.

 

3) Extinction Events - There may have been plenty of aliens, but they all underwent extinction events.  There may have been civilizations more advanced that ours and were wiped out due to some horrible event. Incurable illness, some planetary event. Whatever.

 

4) Intelligence Destroys - The very nature that creates the biodiversity and complexity that allow a species to become intelligent may also be the thing that causes it to be blind to what it is doing and will inevitably destroy itself on a long enough timeline.  From the first time a cellular organism consumed it's neighbor, there was war.  Which means that only the most war-mongering, competitive, destructive species will emerge on top....but that also means that it will inevitably burn itself out since its entire timeline of existence is rooted in doing *exactly* that. 

 

Again, there may have been plenty of alien species but rather than an event out of their control like #4, the event was done by itself.  What if there was an alien species that also understood atomic weapons and used them more recklessly against each other, irradiating their entire planet and killing themselves?  Is humanity stable? What if we continue to use resources that are finite without finding an alternative?

 

Now I feel is where we get crazy.

 

5) Zoo Hypothesis - This is where aliens are intelligent enough to see that we are trying to make signals and expand, but do not want to interfere with us and are just observing as we evolve.  We are essentially in our own world-zoo and aliens are seeing the world like a show and maybe they are waiting until we do X, Y, or Z to *then* contact us back.  Like maybe aliens are waiting for us to have a one-world government and then they will speak with us.  Or maybe they are waiting for us to get to a certain technological benchmark and then talk with us.  Maybe they see humanity as an immature child and not worth talking to us until we solved homelessness/poverty/starvation and once we are empathetic enough, they see us as an 'adult' civilization.

 

6) Berzerker Theory - The theory for this is that there has been a species that has been able to make Von Neumann Probes, which are basically self-replicating drones and in replicating, have 'gone rogue' past their programming and destroyed all other probes  or even other civilizations.  This can be runaway AI.  It would be like the nano-bot version of cancer.  Just like the body replicates the same cells over and over, but eventually there are slight variations or mutations that end up turning into cancerous cells, the robotic version of that would have maladaptive circuitry that was replicated was not made as a perfect replication and therefore, there is a exponential chance of the replication process to be 'tainted'.  For all we know, there are aliens and they are also trying to communicate, but the corrupted probes are severing communication and/or has wiped out other civilizations. For all we know, us sending out signals into space may have doomed us, in that we are alerting this runaway AI of our presence and therefore are next in line to be destroyed when it gets to us.

 

7) Dark Forest Hypothesis - This one might be the scariest one but it's similar to Berzerker Theory.  There may be, in fact, many alien civilizations that are out there but are intentionally staying quiet. The aliens might be hostile and silent, but realize that *not* responding means that they will be safe.  We could be ignored.  There may be an even bigger threat that most of the other aliens out there know about, and out of fear, are not broadcasting because they know they might be next to be wiped out from something even bigger than them.  They are keeping quiet in their little sector because they know what is out there in the black void.  Meanwhile, we are still making noise and attracting something biological.  Think of it like how we are in a dark forest and in the forest are other forms of intelligent life: bunnies, fox, birds, etc.  But they're all hidden.  Birds are in their nests and not chirping.  Fox are in their dens.  Bunnies are hidden in the foliage. They all know there is something in the woods that can kill them as soon as they are spotted.  So at night, nothing is moving.  Nothing...

 

...Except us.  And we think, 'there's nothing here!  Let's bang some rocks and throw sticks.  The other lifeforms could tell us, "stop!  you're going to get *ITS* attention!"  But that would jeopardize them, so they just stay quiet and wait for the inevitable.  Since no one knows another species' intention, the best thing to do would be to kill them on sight, so for all we know, we could be inviting anything to kill us.

 

 

There's some other overlap, like an artificial singularity, but I feel like these are the main cases that are made for the Fermi Paradox.

 

[TimovieMan]

On 9/13/2024 at 4:49 PM, Teros said:

So I recently found out about a something called the 'Fermi Paradox' which talks about aliens and the different theories that there are for why we aren't chatting it up with space-babes.  The options as actually pretty horrifying.  I've been thinking about this for a few days so I wanted to write something up about it.

 

On 9/13/2024 at 4:49 PM, Teros said:

1) The Great Filter - This is somewhat reductionist, I feel.  It's basically saying that the probability really is THAT low.  That there are so many factors that even came up to create bio-genesis and going from procaryotic to eucaryotic (shit I spelled that right first try) cells (multi-cellular organisms) that this run-away form of evolution is pretty much impossible.  We have, through chance, bounded over every evolutionary hurdle to have this amazing breadth of biodiversity which then had an even smaller probability to create *us*.

 

I love this subject!

 

This basically started with Drake's equation. The equation, developed in 1961 by Frank Drake, was an attempt to calculate how many other technologically advanced civilizations (i.e. capable of sending out detectable radio waves) there were in our galaxy.

 

 

N = the number of technologically advanced civilizations that might exist in our galaxy that could communicate with us

R* = the ratio at which stars are formed in our galaxy (currently estimated at 1.5-3 - in 1961 believed to be 1)

fp = the fraction of those stars that have planets orbiting them (currently estimated at approximately 100%, as in: planets orbit around a star as a rule rather than the exception - in 1961 believed to be 20-50%)

ne = the fraction of those planets that are in the life-sustaining "Goldilocks" belt (not too close to the star as to not be too hot, not too far as to not be too cold) (currently estimated at 30-50% - in 1961 believed to be 10-50%)

fl = the fraction of those planets that actually develop life (in 1961 believed to be 100% because life developed on earth pretty much as soon as the conditions were favourable for it)

fi = the fraction of those that actually develop intelligent life (this is estimated to be very low, based on just how long it took for intelligent life to form on earth)

fc = the fraction of those intelligent lifeforms that form a civilization capable of sending out communication (made even smaller by the realisation that this communication needs to be detectable, so they have to be close)

L = the length of time such civilizations exist and send out communication (how long they are detectable)

 

R* and fp are pretty accurate given current knowledge. ne is the point where things get more and more into conjecture, speculation and philosophical debate.

 

In 1961, N was estimated to be 10.000 - which raised the question of Fermi's paradox. If there are 10.000 such civilizations in our galaxy alone, then where is everybody?

 

More pessimistic calculations for the factors in Drake's equation make N very close to 0, as in: we might in fact be alone, and not just in the Milky Way but even across a multitude of galaxies...

 

That's basically what "the great filter" is. One of these unknown factors might be just that unlikely, that it causes intelligent life to be extremely rare. It could even be more than one of these factors...

 

ne might be overestimated, because a planet has to be in that "Goldilocks" belt long enough for life to be able to form, it needs to have the proper proportion of elements for life to be possible, it needs to be far enough from supernovae, and it needs to be stable, in a zone with low enough radiation, and low enough density to avoid asteroid collisions.

The more pessimistic calculations for this lean into the "rare Earth" hypothesis - that the conditions for a planet like ours really are extremely unlikely, that Earth is basically a fluke.

 

fl might be overestimated as well. Just because life developed here as soon as the conditions were right, doesn't mean that's the norm. In fact, if it was common and a natural evolution, then why hasn't it happened multiple times on Earth? The formation of life from dead matter (abiogenesis) might be a fluke as well.

 

fi might be overestimated as well. Especially since intelligence isn't all that important in nature. Dinosaurs ruled Earth for 400 million years. They never evolved beyond "big beasts with tiny brains". Because survival of the fittest and most adaptive is FAR more important than the most intelligent. Being smarter than the next creature won't increase your chances vs a big predator all that much, being stronger on the other hand...

Also, intelligence alone won't get you far. Dolphins are highly intelligent, but with their fins they can't exactly use tools and craft stuff. So how would they evolve into a space-communicating civilization? Opposable thumbs might be a prerequisite as well...

 

fc can be really small as well. We (as in: homo sapiens) have been on Earth for 300.000 years. We've only been advanced enough to send out communications to space for about 80 years. That's not that much.

 

L is the one that's most "out there". And the one that explains most of the non-"great filter" Fermi paradox theories. Optimists might say that L could approach infinity. Once a civilization becomes advanced enough, it might "overcome" everything that might lead to its extinction. Asteroid incoming? Nudge it to a different path. Sun exploding? Move to a different safer planet. Stuff like that.

On the other hand, if L is short, then such civilizations might really be prone to self-destruct. Not too farfetched considering we've already come close during the Cold War. Give a civilization technologically advanced weaponry, but have it not be evolved beyond it's primal instincts, and it's going to be prone to warfare and self-destruction...

Plus other factors might shorten L as well. If other such civilizations go through a similar path as we did, then their resource-hogging while having a technological boom might cause global warming. That in turn might make the planet uninhabitable before they advance to a point where they can counteract it and save themselves.

Or their early space-faring attempts result in Kessler syndrome (collisions in low orbit, like satellites or space stations colliding with debris, creating an avalanche of more debris to the point where space travel becomes impossible).

 

 

Long story short, we really might be a fluke, and the Great Filter might very well be the explanation for Fermi's paradox.

Then again, a lot of the factors in Drake's equation are based on the observation of a single species on a single planet, ours. A test group of 1 makes the error margin for all theories insanely high....

[Teros]

All really interesting stuff.  I'm not sure what's the most terrifying outcome to be honest.  We're just this anomaly in an infinite black void, or that there's something out there watching, waiting, in time.  I always get sort of emotional when I think about existential stuff, like when I watch this video of the 'pale blue dot'.

 

 

Anyways, the past week and a half has been a whirlwind.  Last update was on Fingers Crossed job. Well I had a conversation yesterday and he wasn't able to swing a part-time spot which devastated me. However, in the day that followed, he made it clear that no one really was a good fit for the full time position...

 

And while that is happening, the Boston Job that I wanted last year just popped up.  Like literally two days ago.  A year ago, ladyfriend was dealing with multiple deaths in her family and everyone was a complete mess during the holidays.  During all that, I found the Boston Job and they had a part time position and they hired me; on the condition I got my Boston reciprocity so I could practice social work there.  Things kept getting put off: either the drama, the depression, the holidays, the delays in paperwork and by the time I finally had my reciprocity in January, the Boston Job basically ghosted me. I can't blame them: if you are hiring and expanding and say 'yes' to someone and it takes over three goddamn months to be ready to work for you, you can't wait that long.  I was devastated but what else could I do?

 

However, here they are again - almost exactly a year later and this time, I already have my reciprocity done.  Based off of this, if the interview goes about the same (now with more clinical hours under my belt and with the reciprocity) I feel like it's an almost guarantee.

 

But wait, there's more.

 

While that is happening, another job(let's call it Tranquil Job) contacted me and I have an interview with them tomorrow. It lists multiple roles (full and part-time) so this could work out as well. 

 

At this point, I'm working 3 jobs right now, and I have 3 jobs/interviews waiting.  I contacted the guy at Fingers Crossed full-time job and asked a few questions.  I'm thinking that by the start of next week, I'll have interviewed with Boston Job, Tranquil Job, and also have information ironed out for the Fingers Crossed Full-Time Job and then once I have all my cards laid out, I can make a serious decision.

Add to all of this that when I started looking into the requirements for taking my next license this week, I might be way off on my hours.  I was operating under the idea that I needed 2,000 hours. 

 

Here's the math I *was* using for rough estimates:

Nursing Home- 2 years, 10 hours a week. That's 104x10= 1,040 hours

DudeBros- 1 year, 5 hours a week.  That's 52x5= 260

Hospital- 6 months, 8 hours a week. That's 24x8 = 192

1040+260+192= 1,492

 

1,492 out of 2,000, when projected for my current hours, means at least another 9 months of the status quo.  However...

 

For licensure on the official website,  it says the following:

 

"To become an LICSW, you must hold an LCSW license and complete at least two years of supervised clinical social work experience."  (Nursing home is 2 years so that's all set)

"For LICSW licensure, you must accumulate at least 3,000 hours of clinical practice in a period of 24 to 72 months. Of these 3,000 hours, at least 1,500 hours must be direct clinical work with clients."

 

Here's the thing.... that's 1,492 hours I just calculated were clinical hours.  As in, the 1,492 hours is ALL working with clients.  I never accounted for every week doing hours of casenotes off the clock, doing readings of books related to the field, researching different modalities. So the '1,500 hours must be direct clinical work with clients' will be done next week.  The other 1,500 hours?  It's all unaccounted for stuff that I never added up.  For all I know, I could add another 5-10 hours per week, every week towards the notes/study/research/etc.  At the start of this week, I went from thinking I needed 2,000 to doing the math and realizing I'm close, to then realizing I need 3,000 hours and feeling despair since I'm not close, to then realizing that unaccounted for non-client hours means I might already be done.

 

 

 

This changes everything.  I thought I might need another 9+ months of scraping for work until I could finally take the exam and get the dreamjob I want.  I might need to, instead, start studying this week for taking the exam and book it for this holiday season and have the dreamjob I want before the year is over.  There are a hundred positions available right now for an LICSW which means in the very very very very near future I can choose whatever the hell I want.   I was awake at 2:30 this morning and for two hours did every possible computation of jobs and hours to see what works best and with this new information of it being 1,500 clinicial, that throws my math off even more so I have another 9 months? Or no, like another year, or maybe I'm done already and idk which of the 6 jobs would be the best mix and if I choose one and not the other, do I lose out on certain options, or will I be overwhelmed if I jump into a full-time or do I cobble together multiple part-times or just like.. oh my god.

 

[Elastigirl]

Awesome news! Congrats.

[TimovieMan]

19 hours ago, Teros said:

I was awake at 2:30 this morning and for two hours did every possible computation of jobs and hours to see what works best and with this new information of it being 1,500 clinicial, that throws my math off even more so I have another 9 months? Or no, like another year, or maybe I'm done already and idk which of the 6 jobs would be the best mix and if I choose one and not the other, do I lose out on certain options, or will I be overwhelmed if I jump into a full-time or do I cobble together multiple part-times or just like.. oh my god.

 

You've already stated it:

19 hours ago, Teros said:

At this point, I'm working 3 jobs right now, and I have 3 jobs/interviews waiting.  I contacted the guy at Fingers Crossed full-time job and asked a few questions.  I'm thinking that by the start of next week, I'll have interviewed with Boston Job, Tranquil Job, and also have information ironed out for the Fingers Crossed Full-Time Job and then once I have all my cards laid out, I can make a serious decision.

^ This.
Once you have all the info, you can make a decision. And you'll have options...

 

19 hours ago, Teros said:

This changes everything.  I thought I might need another 9+ months of scraping for work until I could finally take the exam and get the dreamjob I want.  I might need to, instead, start studying this week for taking the exam and book it for this holiday season and have the dreamjob I want before the year is over.  There are a hundred positions available right now for an LICSW which means in the very very very very near future I can choose whatever the hell I want.

...with more options on the way!

[Teros]

I feel like I should give an update on this, as it's basically one of the 4 big things going on.

 

Big thing 1: Trying to scramble and finish cleaning up ladyfriend's parents house so we can put it on the market

Big thing 2: Ladyfriend is doing Keto and I'm doing a variation of whole30/keto myself and we're on track

Big thing 3: Dealing with a bad infection and taking meds and using creams and it's making me super weared down

Big thing 4: The job situation.

 

Few changes have happened regarding the jobs:

The Tranquil job interview happened and I have ZERO interest on dealing with that b.s. so that makes it easier.

The Boston Job still hasn't contacted me so I guess nothing will come of that, so that's ok.

The Fingers Crossed job has me set up for an interview with a whole team of people on October 2nd, which is just a week away.

I contacted Nursing Home job owner and wanted to know about my total hours since I just found out my supervisor left the company and I have no idea how to account for hours and who will do that for me.

Tonight I have supervision with DudeBros job and I'm finding out my total hours there once we have a talk

 

The way it's going, by the end of this week I should know my official hours # and by the end of next week, I'll know if I have a new fulltime job.

 

Based on how that turns out, will also change how the current 3 jobs will pan out over the next couple weeks.

 

[Teros]

I came across this video and it really got me thinking.  I'm hoping it gets other people thinking.  The thing is, I decided to watch it because of a client I had and also because of one of the roommate's being directionless.  I figured, 'I'll watch this and maybe it will help me have a different perspective or way to try and convey the knowledge that I have and help them'.

 

The thing is, this has me through a loop.

 

The video:

 

The video is short and worthwhile in it's entirety.

 

Being a therapist, the first option was 'The Healer' and I identified with that whole-heartedly.  But then I started watching the other ones.

 

The Builder - builders are constructors, CEOS, love technologies and creating foundations.

 

The Artist - envision and create art. Individualist with passion for crafting, performing, and aesthetics.

 

The King - you lead your people with love and power.  Power doesn't come from force, it comes from serving others. Strong social skills.

 

The Knight - following strong values and who serve those with justice and honor.

 

The Vedyn - seeker of truths, sage, loves discovering knowledge and teaching it.

 

The Goldsmith - money and trade, exchanging goods and services.

 

The questions to ask:

What brings you most joy in life?

What makes you feel most alive?

That's the archetype.

 

As each one came up, I could make a case for me being that archetype which makes me wonder if people can have more than one archetype, or if people change archetypes over time.

 

The Healer - What brings me most joy in life/feel alive?  I love being able to heal people.  I love when they make connections in their mind with what is going on in their world.  The spark of 'they get it, they get it' and then knowing that I was able to do this for them, to better their lives: that brings the most joy/feel alive.

 

The Builder- Years ago when I was on the forums, I wanted to serve and build one of the guilds.  That turned into becoming a GL and seeing people network and make friends with each other, find commonalities, and foster an environment of helpfulness and motivation made me feel the most joy/feel alive.  There's a reason I was on here 5, 6, 7+ hours a day, every day, and that's when I lost 120 pounds.  The connections were built and being a builder and being within that environment was the most beneficial thing for me.

 

The Artist - An individualist with a passion for crafting, performing, aesthetics?  I've worked with paper mache, clay, wrote a book, RPG Fanatics accountability storyboard, paint pictures, paint miniatures, craft miniatures, and more.  I just worked on a painting with a client earlier today.  Seeing the ideas that I have, having them swirl around in my head for hours, days, months, even some ones that I haven't expressed yet (for literal years) brings the most joy/feel alive.

 

The King - leading with love. And the idea that serving is what empowers others which then empowers you.  This can be overlapped with The Builder stuff I said.  At no point did I think I was better and I've never been cocky and thought 'I'm the best' and wanted power for power's sake.  In all avenues where there is a collective, I end up being the person who starts doing the lion's share of the work and then I sort of end up being 'elected' as 'king' in a group project in school as well.  Those who want power don't deserve it, and the way it's expressed in the video really resonates with me.

 

The Knight - Something interesting about this one is that knights with no one to serve are miserable and in a way, I can understand this.  Perhaps in my relationships, this is true as well.  And when I think 'serve', I think 'enforce and try to make the best of'.  At least that's how I see it.  When there is nothing to tie myself to per say, I feel a sense of hopelessness.  Many times my depression can be seen as stemming from this.

 

The Vedyn - I love learning.  I love feeling like something 'clicks' in my head.  I'm always rumination and making connections to various systems and thoughts.  It's how I end up explaining things to people in therapy, like when they get frustrated about not making changes fast enough: I will tell them that it's like working out at the gym and that you can't run 500 miles the first day or benchpress 300 pounds.  You have to start small, make incremental gains, and that when doing these emotional/mental exercises, it will cause pain.  But pain is the growth, just like when you work out and are sore the next day.  You're intentionally making micro-tears in muscle fibers that then replicate the cells next to them and create more muscle fiber.  Such is with emotional and mental mastery.  That's just one small example - I think about stuff like this constantly and as I learn, I want to teach. I want to share.  I want to teach others.  At one point, I thought about becoming a teacher before choosing my current therapist path.

 

The Goldsmith - This one is really the only one that I don't resonate with at all.  The thing is: this is what my client would resonate with, which makes me wonder if maybe that is why he still feels lost: all the other paths are ones that make sense to me because in some respects, I walk them.  However, not this one.  More food for thought.

 

Back to the questions to ask:

What brings you most joy in life?

What makes you feel most alive?

 

Healing makes me feel most alive.  Building makes me feel most alive.  Creating makes me feel most alive.  Serving/leading make me feel most alive.  Learning and sharing it makes me feel most alive.  There's overlap with these things.  I love learning because then I can share it.  In order to share it, I express it through art.  Sharing it helps heal.  Healing helps serve.  Serving builds respect and shows leadership through leading by example.  In essence:  The Vedyn leads to the Artist, which leads to the Healer, which with repetition leads to the Builder, which then leads to the King.  Taking all of the information, then expressing it all and hoping others will learn from it, and that exchange from nebulous information into various forms of expression and understanding then leads to building a better environment/community, which in turn creates a cyclical nature and turns into leading.

 

If you are in touch with yourself, I wonder if the most holistic version, the Self-actualized person, would feel this way about most of the archetypes.  I also wonder which of these has the most pull.  Like, I'm simultaneously doing many of these things and the builder/king archetypes are sort of a systemic reaction to the other ones.  And maybe that goes back to the thoughts I was having in the last challenge with how things have changed on the forums - I feel like I'm at a loss of where to start (the knight) and maybe my weakness in relationships also points to this.  I want the best for everyone, including the person that I'm with; and when they aren't doing their best, it feels like a slight against me. I'm trying to take the knowledge, trying to create, trying to build; but if there isn't an equal reciprocal reaction in a relationship (which there never has been with past partners) it makes me feel devastated.  Maybe the Knight is my weakness: something I try in vain to pursue and work on but it just *isn't* me.  Which then makes me wonder if the thoughts in the back of my head are true all along, that doubt me and say that I never should bother being in a relationship with someone. Maybe I'm casting my dice into the lot with a person that is going to disappoint me, and in the end, I'll feel cheated and I'll be less than as a person because of it.

 

Damnit, I have clients.  I'll cut it here.

 

 

 

[Elastigirl]

I resonate must with vedyn, healer, and knight. I care deeply about my people , and want to encourage and help them. I think with strengths also comes weakness. The weakness of these traits is we can begin to think it's our job to  somehow fix people and their hurts. And truth is we have no control over it.   Good relationships  with people are when you are both working on improving yourself,. The catch is what that person thinks they need to work on may not be what you think they should work on.? And if you are a knight it's learning how to embrace your strong values, yet also being companions alongside those who do not share those same values.

[TimovieMan]

"Which archetype are you?"

And all I can think is: Healer, Builder, Knight AND Vedyn.

 

Rangers gonna ranger? ?

[Teros]

Just trying to not freak out.  I really wish I knew wtf was going on with the job.  That's why I haven't been posting really this challenge - I feel like 90% of it is trying to pay attention to literally anything except the anxiety that's running through me.

[DarK_RaideR]

Well call me biased, but just seeing a "I'll tell you what's wrong in your life" video and from a channel named Grim Hustle immediately makes me suspicious. Doesn't help when the video shows Elon Musk as an example of a King CEO or Jordan Peterson as an example of a Vedyn Sage. No matter what one may think of those people, we can at least agree they're controversial.

 

With that out the way, I'm also skeptic about oversimplified "solutions" or shoehorning people into "archetypes" because it seems to subtly reinforce the idea of strict classes (and a hierarchy between them) as well as this being a "natural" thing, as in, do not question said hierarchy.

 

As has been mentioned already, it is clear that none of us fits strictly, let alone exclusively, to one of those archetypes. If there's one takeaway from that video for me, it's -to use the narrator's framework- to not get spread too thin between all those archetypes. Aimlessness comes from trying to do everything at the same time and ending up with doing nothing well. In that sense, it might be better to look for the dominant archetype as the main focus/path/quest, but not to the exclusion of the others. Get the main goal down so you have something as your base guideline, but then also allow yourself to dabble in the others, as long as it doesn't happen at the expense of the main stuff. Not like there's never been merchant princes or warrior poets.

 

Hope everything works out for you with the job(s).

[Teros]

On 10/7/2024 at 4:27 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

"I'll tell you what's wrong in your life"

I didn't even pay attention to that part - I was just interested in the classification stuff which I found thought-provoking.  I don't take a lot of stock in that kind of thing (just like the Myers-Briggs personality archetypes) but It made me think.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ok ok ok a ton has happened and I've been through a rollercoaster of emotions.  The first and most important thing is:

 

 

I got the Fingers Crossed JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Found out yesterday and they sent me a contract to look over. Signed it and next steps are figuring out onboarding and all that stuff.

 

I'll be making double what I make at my market job, and with it not being a contractor job, it means I'll have less $ taken out via taxes so it technically should be paying me even more than DudeBros job and Nursing Home job.  Had a talk with the financial department and on top of this, I'm on 'ladder 2' which means I move up in salary as I become more marketable.  I learn EMDR therapy?  Go up a rung.  Master DBT therapy?  Up a rung.  The biggest pay bump of 'at least over $5,000' is when I get my LI, which I'm on the way to do. So in, say, 6 months I'll have enough hours to take the exam, pass that, then go up a pay grade ladder. 

 

I'm golden.  I just need to stick with this place for a few months to get my hours.  And what's crazy is I'll be working less per day than I currently do.

 

Today:

Nursing home job and I saw 6 people in the morning.

Now I'm home and I'm going to have 3 people for telehealth with DudeBros.

 

That's 9 people today.  My supervisor (who was also the person I interviewed with a couple weeks ago at the job fair) told me that they had a new guy whose schedule was half-full after about 2 months.  Sessions are an hour.  That means their most recent hire sees 4 people/works 4 hours a day. 

 

9 people vs 4 people per day.  And I get paid more per hour and it's salary so there's less taxes taken out and I get a $2,5000 sign-on bonus as well as a medical plan instead of the bottom rung state-aid health insurance.  When you add it all up, I get all 40 hours counting to my LI, the bonus, the less taxes, the medical, and the pay upgrade as I learn more stuff and this is actually a REALLY sweet gig.  They also are flexible on the hours I work, so there's some leeway.

 

--

 

At the beginning of this week, I also had an epiphany at like 4am as I was trying to organize stuff.  There are so many things that I want to do and it's either a 1)time related issues or 2)weight related issues or 3)money related issue

 

For about 8 years now, I've had this thought in my head that I'll never be able to do everything I want to do in my lifetime.  I would start a note or word document and try to figure it out, get overwhelmed and then delete it and then a few months later, I would think about it, try again, get overwhelmed and feel helpless, and then delete it. That is, until a massive issue was figured out Monday morning.

 

The issue is the fact that jobs are 9-5.  With the new job being flexible and me going in earlier, I can also advocate for doing a tele-health in the morning before the shift and therefore see about leaving early. 

 

Once I realized that 7-3 is the key instead of 9-5, a roadblock was eliminated.  Then the next part: chunking up things I want to do by category.  I'll list real quick the things that I'm interested in learning/doing:

 

1) Gym

2) NF

3) Warhammer Game/Build

4) Ghost Hunt

5) Em/Twitch

6) Stream/Podcast

7) Learn Biology/Dr/Medicine

8)Learn Mechanic/Bike Building

9)Learn Gardening/Horticulture

10)Blacksmithing

11)Wood burning

12)Dance

13)Glassblowing

14)Dating Hang-out stuff

 

Obviously I can't simultaneously do all of these every week; hence why I was overwhelmed and I end up doing NONE of those.  The big issue is that some of those are even multiple times a week. How does a person who is falling asleep at sundown at like 6pmish able to work 9-5, and then go do something afterwards?  And when the hell are 95% of these BEFORE 9am?  When you factor in how long it takes to shower, dry off, get dressed, etc, it just didn't add up. But with the 7-3 day, it all makes sense, as well as by chunking these things into categories, as well as listing how often I wanted to do them per week:

 

The category/slots:

1)Gym(weightlift/stretch/cardio)  x3

2)NF x1

3)IRL Social (Ghost Hunt/Emm/Playing Warhammer) x1

4)Stream/Gaming x1

5)School (Learn Dr/Mechanic/Gardening) x2

6)Learn Art/Expression (Blacksmithing, wood burning, dance, glassblowing, date) x1

 

Now I break down how my 'vanilla' days would be.  This is the bare-minimum required each day.  Everything above is he extra stuff.  So a 'vanilla' or basic week would be:

 

Sunday: See Sister/Food Shop/Cooking

Monday: Work/Dinner/Shower

Tuesday: Work/Dinner/Shower

Wednesday: Work/Dinner/Shower

Thursday: Work/Dinner/Shower

Friday: Work/Dinner/Shower

Saturday: Cleaning/Laundry

 

All I do is plug in which category based on unmovable factors. For instance, I found a black that does blacksmithing lessons on Monday nights.  So slot #6 is on Monday.  Let's say I also have night classes for motorcycle building on Wed+Thurs. That's slot 5.  And then let's say I wanted to alternate going to play a warhammer game on Friday, next friday go on Emm stream, then another warhammer game the week after, and then ghost hunt.  So in a month I get in 2 warhammer games, 1 hangout with Emm, and 1 ghost hunt.  All on Fridays.  That's slot 3 on Fridays.   That means:

 

Sunday: [Empty Slot] + [Empty Slot]

Monday; [Slot 6]

Tuesday: [Empty Slot]

Wednesday: [Slot 5]

Thursday: [Slot 5]

Friday: [Slot 3]

Saturday: [Empty Slot]  + [Empty Slot]

 

You can see that I still need to fit in slot1 (gym) 3 times, slot2 (nf) 1 time, slot4(stream/game) 1 time.  So I could fit the others like so:

 

Sunday: [Slot 1] + [Slot 2]

Monday: [Slot 6]

Tuesday: [Slot 1]

Wednesday: [Slot 5]

Thursday: [Slot 5]

Friday: [Slot 3]

Saturday: [Slot 1] + [Slot 4]

 

This Translates into Sunday Morning hitting the gym [slot1], then seeing my sister, doing food shopping, and doing some cooking.  Later that night, post on NF

Monday I go to work and afterwards I go to the wood burning class, have dinner, shower, and relax

Tuesday I get out of work and go straight to the gym and I'm out of there by 4ish, dinner, shower, relax

Wednesday I get out of work and I have an evening class for building motorcycles. Get home, shower, dinner, relax

Thursday I do a repeat since that's the other evening class night so I do motorcycles, home, shower, dinner, relax

Friday I get out of work and bring some minis to the warhammer store and kitbash a few things.  Then play a game and then have dinner, shower, relax

Saturday I hit the gym in the morning, then have breakfast, shower, and then run the dishwasher, laundry, vacuum.  That evening is when I work on building my gaming PC, and when it's done, I stream on twitch and play with some people I know for some co-op stuff for fun and in the meantime, I'm going to draft up stuff I want to do podcasts on.

 

And I mean, I just change the slots if need-be.  Maybe after the blacksmithing class, there is a wood burning class on Wednesdays.  Maybe next semester the motorcycle classes are on Monday and Thursday.  Whatever.  The whole point is, I can do literally everything I want to do without being overwelmed.  I go to work, get out around 3, and then I do *ONE* slot every night, and then I do *TWO* things every weekend in additional to my 'vanilla' basic setup.  I thought to myself maybe I could double some of these, but honestly, I'd rather slowly build up to this 9-slot situation over the next few months. 

 

With me getting the new job, I also have to factor in the, you know, three other jobs that I'm currently working.  I actually have a plan for that as well.  They also will operate like 'slots' until I end up quitting those jobs.  Then the slot will be opened for one of these things I have.  The work plan:

 

Job 1: Market

Job 2: Nursing Home

Job 3: DudeBros

Job 4: Fingers Crossed New Fulltime Job

 

Step 1: Start the onboarding process with Job 4.  I'm now full all week.

Step 2: Use up all my sick time, vacation time, and personal days for Job1/Market so I don't have to go to work for 3-4 weeks.

Step 3: Switch the nursing job and condense it into Monday evening's Slot.  So I'll work Job 4 a full day, then swing by the nursing home for like 3 clients and then head home, shower, dinner, etc.

Step 4: Push the times for the Job3/DudeBros clients so I can do them in the evenings.  That's Tuesday (telehealth) and Wednesday (in person) slots.  I'll work the new job and then on Tuesday, go home and do a couple telehealth.  I'll go work Wednesday and then go straight to Job3/DudeBros and have a few in-person sessions.

Step 5: Find out my total hours for Job2/Nursing Home.  Someone is supposed to be tracking this and when I apply for the license, they need to vouch that I have done X number of hours.

Step 6: All my sick time, vacation time, personal days for Job 1/Market is now used up.  Tell them they have an ultimatum: I can't work on weekdays anymore or evenings.  Literally the ONLY timeslot I have available to work in Sundays which give me time and a half.  If they give me sundays only, I can do a shift there. The ball is in their court.  Either I make more money, or they can't do that.  If they can't comply, then I quit Job 1.

Step 7: Once I find out the hours for licensing on Job2/Nursing home, see what they will cite me for.  If it's less than the 10 hours that was agreed upon, kindly ask for proof of the hours I worked and then quit Job2 (maybe even just temporarily.  Leave on a positive note, stating that if they can't credit me for 10 hours a week for my license, then I need to get another job and once I get my license, I'll be able to take a bigger pool of clients so we can always revisit me being re-hired in, say, 6ish months.  If that's an option, cool.  If not, I don't give a shit.

Step 8:  Let DudeBros know NOT to give me any more clients, since I'm at capacity right now.  As people get better, they are seen less often. I've had a few people who were in crisis and wanted to see me every week, and now that I've helped them, they want to be seen every other week, or once a month.  Some have already 'graduated' and I don't see them anymore.  That's a good thing.  Basically, hold on to my current DudeBros clients until they get better and better and then 'graduate' from therapy and I'm left will less and less.  Eventually it turns into one evening a week instead of two evenings.  Then less and less, until I don't have anymore.  I almost quiet-quit DudeBros just based on there not being any more clients.

Step 9: As each of these jobs gets culled, those time slots open and I can enact my ultimate life plan

Step 10: Get my licensure in like 6ish months.  Once this happens, I have unlimited options:

 -Option 1: I get re-hired by the nursing home and I have a much bigger pool of clients which means this can be a sustainable job and I'll make more $ since I have the license.

 -Option 2: Start getting more clients again via DudeBros and again, get more money per client

 -Option 3: Just keep the new Job4 and get those certifications which will have me move up that $ ladder.  With the license, I get at LEAST an extra $5k a year. With more certifications, I get paid more and more since I can handle more and more nuanced clients that need specific treatment/modalities

 -Option 4: I quit literally everything and work for the 2+ dozen other agencies that want someone with the license I now have.  Also an option: Traveling therapist, where I get paid an ASSLOAD (I'm talking $2,500+ week) to relocate to a different state and live there for 3 months at a time and be an awesome therapist there.  In those 3 months, I can get a temporary apartment, sight-see, and explore all sorts of stuff.

So basically:

Step 10: Win at life.  By that point I'll have my license, make more money, and with me doing whole30 and sticking to it strictly, I'll theoretically be down 70-100 pounds.  Just keep sticking with it.  I'll also have, realistically, a minimum of $10k saved up and that goes towards getting that medical/mechanic/gardening degree, I'll have a few $k ready to build a godly gaming PC and then I'll be streaming.  I'll have enough $ to do the blacksmithing class ($500) wood burning class ($400?), dancing ($???), glassblowing ($???), and I'll have a few bucks for minis as well. The extra $10k I have saved will also help with home repairs on my side of the house, which means the market value will go up when I want to sell if, say, I decide to do the traveling therapist route.  I could essentially be a nomad:  city-hopping every 3 months to experience a whole new state's society and fun things to offer.  Really, the sky is the limit with this strategy.  I've been poor all my life, like making $300-bucks-a-week levels of poor.  I know what it's like to scrounge and not waste.  To never buy delivery.  To stretch the usage out of limited resources.  To save up the measly dollars to pay for my masters degree. With this domino of Fingers Crossed job now tipping, ALL of what I've written about in this post is possible if I keep to a very well planned out and disciplined routine.  If I stick to my guns, if I juggle the jobs, use the slot-category technique, if I save up the money, if I stick with eating healthy, my life will look insanely different by next summer or so.  It's finally time to reap what I've sown with all the bullshit I've gone through.   I still need to help with cleaning out my ladyfriend's parents house and a lot of cleaning to do at my place, but I can see the path in front of me.  I'm on my way to the mountain top.  And it's difficult, but oh so ....

 

  

[TimovieMan]

 

So happy for you!!!

[Ranger Hal]

Congratulations! I'm super excited for you!

[DarK_RaideR]

Great news! Real happy for you, congratulations.

 

On 10/11/2024 at 4:59 PM, Teros said:

Had a talk with the financial department and on top of this, I'm on 'ladder 2' which means I move up in salary as I become more marketable.  I learn EMDR therapy?  Go up a rung.  Master DBT therapy?  Up a rung.  The biggest pay bump of 'at least over $5,000' is when I get my LI, which I'm on the way to do. So in, say, 6 months I'll have enough hours to take the exam, pass that, then go up a pay grade ladder. 

This kinda sounds like a bit of an RPG mechanic, levelling as you upgrade your work skills/traits/abilities and making more gold in return

 

On 10/11/2024 at 4:59 PM, Teros said:

I didn't even pay attention to that part - I was just interested in the classification stuff which I found thought-provoking.  I don't take a lot of stock in that kind of thing (just like the Myers-Briggs personality archetypes) but It made me think.

Didn't mean to come across as dismissive or patronizing btw, just as my comments weren't meant specifically for you but also anyone else hanging out here, sort of a "thinking out loud" situation.

[Teros]

On 10/14/2024 at 5:31 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

This kinda sounds like a bit of an RPG mechanic, levelling as you upgrade your work skills/traits/abilities and making more gold in return

right?  Level up. +$3 cash lol

 

On 10/11/2024 at 12:43 PM, TimovieMan said:

 

So happy for you!!!

Thanks. Looking forward to it.

 

On 10/11/2024 at 2:20 PM, Ranger Hal said:

Congratulations! I'm super excited for you!

I've super nervous but I feel like I got this.

 

On 10/14/2024 at 5:31 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Didn't mean to come across as dismissive or patronizing btw, just as my comments weren't meant specifically for you but also anyone else hanging out here, sort of a "thinking out loud" situation.

nah nah nah you didn't; it's fine man.  And thanks. 

 

Time to make a new challenge that actually takes into account this huge news.

g