[Mistr]

I am glad that you were able to go out and get food and supplies before the storm hit.

 

I'm so sorry that the air pressure changes reek havoc with your head. You are doing all the right things, and it sucks that you have to do that. I hope that the storm passes without too much damage and disruption to things you care about.

[RES]

21 hours ago, Heidi said:

The storm unleashed some serious TBI effects, with a tornado coming through and messing with the atmospheric pressure, which also messes with my head. It was a long night, friends, and I’m glad I have Maxalt and a safe sturdy building

I am glad you do as well, those effects are no joke ?

[Sovalis]

Hi Friend. Just thinking of you and hoping you are okay. ❤️ 

[Heidi]

On 9/27/2024 at 6:06 PM, Mistr said:

I am glad that you were able to go out and get food and supplies before the storm hit.

 

I'm so sorry that the air pressure changes wreak havoc with your head. You are doing all the right things, and it sucks that you have to do that. I hope that the storm passes without too much damage and disruption to things you care about.

Thank you — the TBI effects were largely manageable, and involved a lot of resting and letting my mind just wander wherever it needed to go.

22 hours ago, RES said:

I am glad you do as well, those effects are no joke ?

They are no joke indeed.

I’ve read that epileptics and other folks with neuro-cognitive disorders were treated in ancient times as receiving messages from the gods. I don’t know about all of that, but positioning myself in this light when an episode happens is helpful: I am not in control, the best thing is just to find someplace safe and protected, and make sure I have water and healthy (bland) snacks around for whatever times make sense. It’s a wild ride, made smoother only by acceptance. 

17 hours ago, Sovalis said:

Hi Friend. Just thinking of you and hoping you are okay. ❤️ 

I’m dropping in this morning to say that I am okay.

I am grateful for my sturdy brick-and-cinderblock building (it used to be a YMCA and was a designated disaster shelter back when cities did those sorts of things). I’m grateful that my apartment is on the second and third floors, and grateful that the windows in this section of the building are modern and seal well (my windows in the “original” section 4th floor were not double-hung, and dated back to the original construction in the mid-70s).

I am grateful for maxalt and modern medicine and for the the cave environment that I set up in my bedroom.

Speaking of the cave environment in my bedroom, I think I need to go full-on Druid and decorate it accordingly. I’ll need to find some “forest-ish” fabric, or whathaveyou to world-build the walls. But I digress.

 

I logged out of work at noon on Friday and that was a good thing.

I really sort of have no understanding of time and space since then, since I didn’t need to go anywhere or do anything, and I just went along for the ride with my beloved .303 Bookworm.

 

I think it was the middle of the night when I woke up and made golden noodle soup with chicken. 

I am well and safe and whole.

All will be well enough.

❤️

 

[RES]

19 minutes ago, Heidi said:

I am grateful for my sturdy brick-and-cinderblock building (it used to be a YMCA and was a designated disaster shelter back when cities did those sorts of things). I’m grateful that my apartment is on the second and third floors, and grateful that the windows in this section of the building are modern and seal well (my windows in the “original” section 4th floor were not double-hung, and dated back to the original construction in the mid-70s).

I am grateful for maxalt and modern medicine and for the the cave environment that I set up in my bedroom.

Speaking of the cave environment in my bedroom, I think I need to go full-on Druid and decorate it accordingly. I’ll need to find some “forest-ish” fabric, or whathaveyou to world-build the walls. But I digress.

 

Oh I love the idea of 'cave' decorations  

[Heidi]

1 hour ago, RES said:

Oh I love the idea of 'cave' decorations  

I haven’t decided what I want the “cave world” to look like just yet.

I’m leaning away from ‘forest” and more towards “inner cave lit by unseen glow with a few possibly magical treasures”

Some key considerations are that it be

1. simple — there can’t be anything too fiddly or in the walkway — imagine someone walking around with her eyes closed in pitch dark
2. softly lit — if I were to go with apricot hangings on the walls, for instance (which I’m kind of considering so that it’s lovely when lit), they should be linen or another matte fabric that generally absorbs light when not lit. Any lighting should have a very low light feature available without being too fiddly.
3. quiet — no waterfalls or fountains, if you please, despite how amazing this would be, generally. 
4. Lovely. I’m all about it being welcoming and a sense of ‘retreat’ and not a sense of deprivation or banishment

I’ll think more on this when I have project-level bandwidth, which I absolutely do not have right now. Inspiration will come.  

 

While I made tea, I noticed that the apples and pears for this week had about one day left, so I peeled and cored them and set them (with just a dash of water) in the crock pot to do their thing for most of the day (low on 6-8 hours) to become applesauce. I put the pear scraps in the compost bin and the apple scraps in a liter glass container, tamped them down with the handle end of the wooden spoon, and covered them with water. They’ll sit in a dark cabinet for a couple weeks and become apple cider vinegar.

 

We’re scheduled to get more rain over the next few days as remnants of Helene move east out to the ocean. So far we haven’t had any major flooding events in my town — most of the destruction was down-mountain, and the folks there are really having a time of it. Asheville and other towns are just completely obliterated, and some of them can’t be gotten into or out of, and the cell towers came down as well, so information will be patchy coming in. Even if our river floods, I think at this point it will likely only hit inconvenient and ugly at worst, and not the catastrophic and apocalyptic that others are experiencing. 

 

Lake Lure Flowering Bridge (about 4.5 hours to the southwest of me, or down-mountain as we say in Appalachia), and the village around Biltmore is wiped out and inaccessible. I don’t see any reports as of yet about The Biltmore Estate itself, but it has to be impacted. 

 

Here, everything continues to be canceled as people hunker down and wait it out. The flash flood warnings persist, and are in effect until Tuesday evening. I have an appointment downtown on Tuesday afternoon that I’ll likely walk to.

 

The .303 Bookworm has settled down.

I have learned that suffering comes when I ignore the disability, trying to do “what I would normally be doing” or try to continue with whatever task is at hand. If I can let go (lie down in the cave, divorce myself from clocks and calendars), my experience is still extremely trippy but the suffering is reduced. Taking a maxalt helps, of course, and I do that, too. I’m glad I was able to just ride the wave of this episode. I had a lot of insight and inspiration, as I often do, and remember almost none of it, which is also usually the case. I’m glad I was able to eat some along the way — yesterday I had the golden noodle soup with chicken and that is always restorative, and before that I wasn’t able to cook at all, so I had some of the barley and navy beans from the fridge (microwaves are a modern miracle!). I made a salad at one point, and found it in the fridge this morning, and I’ll be having that for a late lunch or dinner today with the last of the chicken noodle soup. I barely remember making the salad; it looks pretty good.

 

I still have some five grain bread from this week’s loaf, and really all I want is toast with honey and a tall glass of milk, so I’ll probably make that and eat it while I catch up on the forums for a bit.  

 

[RES]

I love those ideas for the 'cave', much agreement on no water features for reasons

The damage done by this storm is horrific, I keep seeing images on the news that are so heartbreaking. I feel very fortunate all my loved ones are accounted for.

[Jarric]

20 hours ago, Heidi said:

“inner cave lit by unseen glow with a few possibly magical treasures”

 

May I propose that this aesthetic includes bioluminescent mushrooms? Glowing fungi feel good for a cave.

 

20 hours ago, Heidi said:

all I want is toast with honey and a tall glass of milk,

 

Oo, that sounds wonderful actually.

 

Glad the worst of the storm has passed - stay safe out there ❤️

[Mistr]

I am glad to hear that you made it through the storm safely. The brain effects are clearly no fun, but you knew what would happen and implemented a solid plan to cope.

[Heidi]

On 9/30/2024 at 7:53 AM, Jarric said:

May I propose that this aesthetic includes bioluminescent mushrooms? Glowing fungi feel good for a cave.

Possibly. I like the mushroom image-energy. but I'm hesitant to put in anything that can't be turned off for my peace -- like glow in the dark stars and butterflies that I had in the previous apartment. They  are beautiful and cheerful and usually great, but sometimes, though not very often, I needed them to just hush.

 

I made it back to the gym yesterday morning and logged in and did work things and was about to do a forum post whenI got a message that electricity was being shut off in the downtown area (where I live) because a fault had started a fire in a large downtown building and fire crews were shutting the whole thing off "for an extended amount of time" as they addressed the emergency. I started to panic: how would I manage work and personalities and toxic expectations? Wait. No. The universe was giving me a literal hall pass to take the nap I so deeply needed. I told my work team that I was out of power, logged off and took a nap. This is the Way.

 

The weather is still crummy, the last day of the remnants of the storm. Flash flood warnings are still everywhere, and some schools are still closed. 

I didn't want to get out of bed at all this morning, and definitely didn't want to do anything on my list.

I got up and made tea, unloading and reloading the dishwasher while the kettle heated.

I put on my tennis shoes and went out the door, tea in hand, to take the long route to the gym, the "extra ten minute" walk that has now become part of my routine. 

Yesterday morning I took pictures of the street art that I pass on the street one block over --it's a run down street, with abandoned buildings and unattended lots. It's a street that feels more like a ramshackle alleyway, and unhoused people can be found taking shelter in doorways more often than actual customers or business owners. It's name of Luck Avenue seems like a cruel irony. There's a set of garage bays that someone took the time to paint a few years ago, back in the Before Times just before the pandemic. 

 

This morning I made note of the Peace Pole in the front yard of the church across the street from my building (the street's name Church Avenue is about as unimaginative as it gets -- we are lousey with churches in my town, and particulalry along this street; one bell tower or another is tolling out throughout the day, marking time or just calling us to service), as I often do as I rounded the corner of my street heading toward Luck. This morning I stopped to take a picture of the Peace Pole for the West Marches campaign, and noticed the sign at the front of the building: Neighbor is not a geographical term; it is a moral concept.

There's a little free library bench in nestled in front of the bank of wildflowers that keeps the yard looking especially cheerful, and then a few feet on, at the corner, is the pole with "may peace prevail on earth" in many different languages. I used to have a peace pole, and I miss it, and having one here made a big differnence in choosing that this was the place I wanted to live. Not a deciding factor, by any means, but one that seemed to be a welcome and a note from the Universe that yes, I'd found the right place. 

I walked a full mile this morning, the first time in nearly a week since the weather issues began. It felt good, but it took some determination. 

The steam room and sauna were once again a blessing.

 

At home I put my gym clothes, towel, and spa wrap in the wash and logged in for the morning work before the morning team meeting. This is good. This is the Way.

There is a big Enterprise Leadership level meeting happening this afternoon that has me a little nervous. I'm trying to quell the energy; whatever decision will be made has, in fact, already been made, and I'll be informed of the impacts to my job (if there even are any), tomorrow at the earliest. All will be well. The Universe loves me and wants me to be happy. 

 

I have clean clothes and clean dishes.

The kitchen is set to rights after several days of low-key neglect.

I have a knitting project that is far more my speed than the remaining two essays that I still have yet to read before tomorrow's lunchtime meeting with James.

 

I am considering not doing Brain PT, and this feels like a significant choice, so I'm sitting with it.

It is very expensive as well as time consuming, and I'm not certain I'm in a position to take all this one. We will see what insights I get along the Way.

 

This week, such as remains:

• Meeting this afternoon (rescheduled from last week)
• Haircut this afternoon.
• Zazen tonight? Might just curl up and knit, honestly. I'm still very worn out.
• Reading tomorrow morning
• Meeting with James tomorrow
• Massage tomorrow afternoon
• Court Thursday morning
• Jedi Lunch Thursday afternoon
• Brain PT Friday
• Acupuncture Friday
• Georgia's visit on Saturday and Sunday

[Mistr]

You have a lot going on right now. The storm last weekend took a lot of time that you would otherwise have used for study, work and life maintenance. It is no wonder that you are tired.

 

I recommend taking the time to rest. Brain PT will be available in the future when you have more capacity to spend the time and money.

[Heidi]

34 minutes ago, Mistr said:

You have a lot going on right now. The storm last weekend took a lot of time that you would otherwise have used for study, work and life maintenance. It is no wonder that you are tired.

 

I recommend taking the time to rest. Brain PT will be available in the future when you have more capacity to spend the time and money.

This is Wisdom, thank you. It helped me have the gumption to say “no, not this week, thank you.”

Appointment rescheduled.

 

The appointment this afternoon went well.

Having my hair washed and trimmed is something I don’t do often since the pandemic, and it felt like pampering. I’m very glad I went.

I had some good pre-court conversations after the hair appointment, and I feel centered, but also very wrung out. FitBit says that I’ve walked nearly 6000 steps today, and that might be all I get today.

 

I’m glad I did laundry and dishes and house things this morning.

I came home from appointments and some strange BMW was parked in my space, and I felt a bit like a jerk calling to have it towed, but that’s what we’re supposed to do, and I did wait for over 30 minutes to see if the owner would come and fetch out their car, which they did not.

 

I’m going to make a pot of tea and see what’s what with the knitting. This is all I’m up for tonight.

[Heidi]

Church bells from the rooftop terrace

[Heidi]

Went to court.

Woke up on time to go to the gym, but so exhausted I didn’t do anything other than get ready for court.

 

It was a long conversation in court, and not terribly difficult, but exhausting anyway.

The whole matter has been set aside until February.

 

Tired now.

Might nap.

[Mistr]

I am glad that court was not terribly difficult. Just hearing about you having to go through that again and again is exhausting. I hope you get some rest.

[Heidi]

6 hours ago, Mistr said:

I am glad that court was not terribly difficult. Just hearing about you having to go through that again and again is exhausting. I hope you get some rest.

I am glad I canceled lunch out.

It took over an hour to really settle — everything seems to be taking forever today.

I opened my phone and popped up the grocery list for this week, the one with a few items for Georgia’s visit. I added a few things that I need for the pantry, and then on a whim I added a prepared shashimi roll from the deli, asked to have the whole thing delivered, and promptly sat down and closed my eyes.

 

When it all arrived, I put it away and ate a bite of shashimi, still thinking I wasn’t really hungry, but knowing I needed something more than nuts and dried fruit that have been my staple for the last several days. DANG that was a good idea. Thank you, me. I’m still not feeling very energetic, and things are taking a long time, but the sushi things are feeling restorative. I think I’m going to sit down with shashimi and an episode — I can’t remember what day it is, but I’m pretty sure I have a selection to choose from for catching up.

 

❤️

[Heidi]

Good morning, friends.

 

I was exposed to more of the public yesterday morning than I have been in the last month, and I think my poor system is overwhelmed.

I am fighting off the crud (fingers crossed it’s not anything major), and so of course I didn’t go to the gym this morning. We’ll see how i feel this afternoon.

 

In other news, I set up another batch of apple-pear sauce yesterday, and it’s lovely. 

I like making it without any spices and then adding whatever I’m in the mood for in the moment as I use it.

On Tuesday evening, I used a cup of the previous batch with 3/4 c. Old fashioned rolled oats, 1 teaspoon of brown sugar, and a dash of cinnamon. I stirred it all up and set it in the fridge to do its overnight oats thing. I ate it around dinner time on Wednesday, and man, let me tell you it was amazing. If you’re looking for a vegan gluten free fiber-packed bit of yummy goodness, this satisfies (make sure your oats are from a gluten free processor if you are being mindful of gluten). I’m pretty sure the oats carried me through the morning, and I’m glad I had them.

 

This morning is housekeeping day so I got up and neatened enough for the cleaning while I made tea.

I ordered a Covid test and I’m negative.

I took some homeopathic cold-be-gone, and I have tea.

Might watch Deadpool and Wolverine  solely for Electra.

 

 

[Heidi]

Wow.

I am definitely fighting something off, and hard.

I’m very glad I canceled the Covid booster appointment today and the afternoon acupuncture.

I am so tired I can barely move. I’m not in pain or discomfort, so it’s all fine enough — I just need to rest and drink tea, which is exactly what I’ll be doing for the rest of the evening.

?

[Ranger Hal]

Hoping for healing rest for you.

[Artemis Prime]

It's amazing how many of the world's problems could be solved by rest and tea. May they have a restorative effect on you!

[Sovalis]

I hope you recover swiftly and smoothly. ?

[Heidi]

On 10/4/2024 at 5:09 PM, Ranger Hal said:

Hoping for healing rest for you.

Thank you, Hal.

On 10/4/2024 at 7:58 PM, Artemis Prime said:

It's amazing how many of the world's problems could be solved by rest and tea. May they have a restorative effect on you!

True! Rest and tea for all, liberally and often!

On 10/4/2024 at 10:15 PM, Sovalis said:

I hope you recover swiftly and smoothly. ?

Thanks, Sov. It really did wonders just to unplug.

 

The healing Friday went exactly as it should have, which is to say that I remember almost nothing since all I did was sip tea and take very long naps between doses of cold-begone. 

 

Saturday’s visit with Georgia was lovely. We got pizza and just generally hung out with each other, as we do. She has a tremendously sore calf and so taking it easy was definitely all she wanted. We watched a couple episodes, read near each other in the Library, chatted about whatever came to mind in the moment, and played games together, and we repeated all this today, and it was lovely and good. I gave her the 2024 Marching Band shirt, and we talked a bit about band, and I do hope she will be allowed to go to the football game Friday night. When I ordered the pizza, I ordered what I thought was two brownies and which turned out, in fact, to be two pans of brownies, and I sent a whole pan home with her to share.

 

After she went home, I had makeup pinball night, so I got my things together and went downtown tot he museum. Most of the women were able to show up, and we had a full house, which was nice. I think we are all exhausted though. I certainly was, and I left early, which I usually do. Even so, it was good to see everyone and say hello and catch up, even if only briefly. 

 

I considered taking a bath when I got home, but I was actually a bit too tired for that, as odd as that sounds. And also I was hungry. I generously scooped some cranberry pecan chicken salad into avocado halves, poured a tall glass of milk and sat down with The Thursday Murder Club. I’m a bit more than halfway through it and it continues to be delightful. It’s exactly the sort of fare that I need right now, with exactly the right tone. The meal had enough of all the right kinds of fats and protein in abundance; the fiber and carbs are bonus: when my head gets all spinny and my ears start to ring, i need healthy fats in abundance, enough to saturate everything to a point of replenishment. I can’t just sit around and drink milk — I mean, I kind of did this during the first half of 2020 and again through all of 2023, and it was very helpful, but over the course of last year I also started looking into some other healthy fats that could help fit the bill. Avocados have a nice boost for fiber and vitamins,  and a bunch of trace minerals that are needed as well. Using them as my shell for chicken salad feels like goblin food, honestly, because it’s so rich. The cranberries and pecans feel a little luxurious, too, even though they are in there for nutrition. 

 

I set everything to rights in the kitchen and the library, ran the dishwasher, and I’m ready for bed.

I don’t really want to go to work in the morning, or even to meet up with my Jedi council for lunch tomorrow, but I think this is just me still being worn out from this whole week.

 

I hope you had an excellent week, Friends.

Week 4 had two trips to the gym and a lot of restorative rest for me otherwise.

My house is clean, and my homework is done enough. 

My food was nourishing and satisfying.

I have a book and knitting.

Life is good.

❤️ 

 

 

[Ranger Hal]

3 hours ago, Heidi said:

When I ordered the pizza, I ordered what I thought was two brownies and which turned out, in fact, to be two pans of brownies, and I sent a whole pan home with her to share.

That sounds kind of amazing. I love brownies!

[Artemis Prime]

11 hours ago, Heidi said:

sat down with The Thursday Murder Club. I’m a bit more than halfway through it and it continues to be delightful.

Thursday Murder Club is absolutely delightful! I am halfway through The Bullet that Missed now.

[Heidi]

7 hours ago, Ranger Hal said:

That sounds kind of amazing. I love brownies!

Her dad does, too, so I'm pretty sure everyone enjoyed my happy accident.

2 minutes ago, Artemis Prime said:

Thursday Murder Club is absolutely delightful! I am halfway through The Bullet that Missed now.

I'm so glad to know that there is another TMC fan. Bullet is the third one, right? 

I think when we build that little HalfwayPoint shack, we'll need to set copies of these sorts of books on the shelf above the tea pot.  

 

Good morning, Friends.

It took a Gumption Spell to get out of bed this morning, but I did it. 

I walked the long way to the gym, and then finished my Morning Mile on the track. This continues to be a nice way to help bolster my gumption, and I'm glad I have it.

I did the steam room and sauna afterwards, and even though I was early enough that the Mean Ladies were there, I was tired enough from my workout that I just didn't care, and I like this, too.

 

At home I put in a load of laundry and set up a pot of tea, and logged in.

I had a lot of trepidation around going to work this morning that was dispelled by simply logging in and finding nothing much at all. WHEW. These end-of-quarter precarity events take a toll, and I'm glad to know that I have another one behind me. Last night I talked a little with Ben about "the work thing" and mentioned that earlier this year I had considered doing a few licenses as backup income streams, and then I thought about that this morning on the track. Perhaps it's a good idea to revisit some of this and not leave it until there is a crisis. Failing to plan, as they say, is planning to fail and whathaveyou.

 

I really enjoyed spending my downtime reading a mystery novel, and I would love to conitnue that for another several weeks, but I have four essays to read in the next couple days, so I'll see if I can read a couple each evening.  I have lunch appointments today and tomorrow, so that time is already spoken for.  This week's reading's are all about Dewey's views on Education, starting with "What is a School For?" and I'm very much looking forward to reading and revisiting this. 

 

I updated my challenge tracker this morning -- I have been remiss about most everything since Tuesday afternoon. I can't believe we're on the last week -- holy cow that happened fast. So far I've done pretty well with gym days and walking and housechore things. There was a lot to digest this round, and I can't remember exactly how it all got done, but amazingly, it did. I still have some few things this week (dentist appointment; Jedi Council lunch; discord creation for Women's Pinball League), but they feel small and manageable. I still don't want to go out of the Loft, mind you, and don't really want to talk with anyone yet. The post-court introvert hangover is real, and is taking its sweet time. I think I would like to build an Invtrovert's Delight challenge next round if at all possible.

 

I also noticed while tallying up the numbers that I've done pretty well at brining the level up a bit, even with all the rest days built in. This is good information, and it helps me see not only what works but how it works, and you know that this nerd loves that. Adding in the long way to the gym has been brilliant, due in large part to the West Marches campaign (thank you to @Sovalis and @DarK_RaideR for the DMing leadership! I owe you guys, so let me know if you want chocolate or flowers or washi tape or cool dice or an amazon gift card.) I was able to fold the challenge narratives into things each week that have built up my base level.  Even more than that, though, I realized that this challenge I haven't felt as isolated, and have felt more engaged with my life, and this is a blessing.  Many thanks to each of you who joined in. I feel like I talk with you in my head as I'm going about my day, especially on that long walk to the gym, and it's nice to feel present and connected.

 

I've been pretty absent on the forums last week, understandably, but I miss you all and am looking forward to dropping into your threads and catching up.

May you have peace this day.

❤️