[Heidi]

This is a season of Launching.

There are so many projects that have been in the works for several years that are now coming out into the world: SOPHIA Roanoke; Band Communications Officer; Belles & Chimes; the novel; all the many things involving Vivian.

Here. We. Go.

 

Skill	24.03	2024.04 Focus Activity	May 6th - June 9th, 2024 Reflection Week Jun10-16
Constitution	12	Carry forward: Walking: 2+ miles a day New goal: WATER (drink it; log it) Stretch goal: Sauna?	Look for a walk to the Farmer’s Market on Thursdays, daily walks on purpose, and overall increase to activities that happen to involve walking.   I’d like to be more mindful and intentional about drinking water, eating fiber, and eating salads.   Getting back to the sauna would likely do wonders for my sleep and my sense of presence.
Strength	15	Carry Forward: Going to work Stretch goal: Second job? New Goal: Lift - anything that weighs more than a loaf of bread	If I can find something to add to the cash generation, it’ll go directly to the debts. I’m doing just fine, of course, but I’ve noticed that the debt tally is taking a toll on my sleep, so if I can find a remote temp job for a few hours a day over the summer while I don’t have classes, this would be some Wisdom as well as some strength.    Possibilities: Real estate license; still navigating if I have possibilities for growth at the current job.
Intelligence	16	Carry Forward: Philosopher James 2x/week  New Goal: Work on the novel. 1,000 words a day. Stretch goal: One Sheets and Fliers for upcoming Philosophy Sessions.	I still have a massive Legislation Spreadsheet to finish in Zero Week. It’s the basis for Manuscript 1 of the dissertation. Spreadsheet due to Neal May 31.   Updated précis for the dissertation committee to be sent out in June with an invitation to meet in late August to discuss qualifying exam questions.   Philosophy with James continues. This is the foundation for Manuscript Three of the dissertation.   Writing the novel is definitely part of this challenge. Look for word counts.   I'm always hesitant to increase beyond 16, but there's some real proficiency being wrought, so I might bump this to 17 depending on how much I am able to deliver.
Dexterity	18	Emotional Balance and Mental health	Schedules & Calendars Marching Band Camp Summer Visitation Football Calendar ✅ Counseling sessions Court. Yes, friends, after nothing for years, there is another court date, this time during reflection week, which is just about perfect.
Wisdom	18	Stretch Goal: Spending Fast Continue forward: debt New Goal: Sort out the taxes mess	Debt and Taxes, it’s like a bad 80s punk band.
Charisma	16	Alliances Continue: Time with Emily, Erica, the Band New Goal: Women's Pinball League Summer (June 10-August 5) New Goal: Star Trek & Philosophy Continue: Home-making: Assemble furniture	SOPHIA Roanoke Make the Star Trek flier Make the SOPHIA Roanoke web page Choose the calendar for the coming session; schedule the Parrot Room for May 17  ✅ June 14, July 19, August 23. Consider writing a grant proposal for the Rice Room at the Jefferson Center and  running the sessions. [If we move to the Jefferson Center, make it Philosophy Fridays at Four. Serve Tea. Consider an informal dinner location after the event.) Belles & Chimes Post Calendar on website ✅ Finalize Summer League Dates with IFPA? Maybe not necessary Website Login   ✅ Spreadsheet for scores   ✅ Band Communication Officer Discord   ✅ Discord Show & tell Google Calendar   ✅ Fundraising   ✅ Jazz Cafe   ✅ Out & Abouting Movies on Fridays and Sundays Swing Dance on Wednesdays 504 Meeting —April 29th   ✅ Band Spring Concert —April 30th ✅ Coffee House Mornings Farmer’s Market Thursdays beginning May 9th Pick your own strawberries—May 11th 🍓 🍓?? Philosophy & Star Trek — May 17th Jazz Cafe — May 17th Shakespeare — May 25-26 Community Concert — May 31
Stamina	7	Continue: Rest, Healing New goal: Resume Acupuncture Stretch Goal: yoga?	Good sleep schedule, once again Yoga? Dance   A friend recommended a new-to-town acupuncturist, and I made an appointment. Fingers crossed that it’s a good solution. ✅   Definitely continuing with the new massage therapist 2-3 times this round.

 

[Sovalis]

You know I am here for this. Crossing my fingers for the acupuncturist to be a good one!!

[Heidi]

4 hours ago, Sovalis said:

You know I am here for this. Crossing my fingers for the acupuncturist to be a good one!!

Always excellent to have you along. ❤️ 

 

OYEZ, OYEZ!!

PAPER IS SUBMITTED AND LO, I AM NOW DONE WITH THE SEMESTER.

That is all.

As you were. 

 

[Sovalis]

[DarK_RaideR]

Digging the D&d setup. And congratulations on submitting the paper! Could do with a little less on your plate

[Heidi]

2 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

Could do with a little less on your plate

When is this never not true?  

 

And also, you are 100% correct. There's a lot (probably too much).

I'm looking forward to getting a lot of the setup pieces done this week so that I can move on to the doing pieces (which are still, in fact, a lot). 

I'm definitely bumping the real estate license down the list, and won't count it as a loss if it scoots out to the next challenge as long as I do it mindfully.

I think you've highlighted the crux of this challenge, in fact: That there is SoVeryMuch on my plate, it's all going to need to be handled with a deft amount of discernment, which is like Dex times Int raised to the Wis. Even when these are the strong suits, it's still a lot of precise work.

 

Had a brilliant Nothing Day yesterday, which I really liked and clearly needed.

I started watching Daisy and the Six,  and it's hitting all the storytelling and music sweet spots. I really like it and didn't realize how much I needed another fake-band drama in my life. 

No word counts, no walking, nothing much at all yesterday beyond the paper and assembling the coffee table. This is good; this is the Way.

 

I have a meeting this morning at Vivian's school and I really don't want to even put on real clothes, let alone leave the apartment, but here we are.

I am working on putting together a punch list because there are so many moving pieces and parts for this challenge, and it feels very front-loaded, with so much happening in Reflection Week.

I'm expecting a lot of little updates along the way.

❤️ 

 

 

[Heidi]

10 hours ago, Sovalis said:

Is that an hourglass he's waving? Becuase i could use a Jedi Master with a magic hourglass in my life this round!

❤️ 

[Mistr]

6 hours ago, Heidi said:

And also, you are 100% correct. There's a lot (probably too much).

I'm looking forward to getting a lot of the setup pieces done this week so that I can move on to the doing pieces (which are still, in fact, a lot). 

^^^^^^^^This

 

6 hours ago, Heidi said:

I'm definitely bumping the real estate license down the list, and won't count it as a loss if it scoots out to the next challenge as long as I do it mindfully.

I think you've highlighted the crux of this challenge, in fact: That there is SoVeryMuch on my plate, it's all going to need to be handled with a deft amount of discernment, which is like Dex times Int raised to the Wis. Even when these are the strong suits, it's still a lot of precise work.

 

You had not mentioned real estate before, what do you find appealing about that line of work?

 

I am surprised because real estate involves a lot of walking and being on your feet. It would be hard to do just on your good days.

 

Something like proposal writing or copyediting would fit well with your skills and would give you more flexibility.

 

[Heidi]

19 minutes ago, Mistr said:

You had not mentioned real estate before, what do you find appealing about that line of work?

 

I am surprised because real estate involves a lot of walking and being on your feet. It would be hard to do just on your good days.

 

Something like proposal writing or copyediting would fit well with your skills and would give you more flexibility.

 

The income stream has always been appealing to me, and I love staging real estate, finding the right owners, helping find the best funding options and the like.

I'm not concerned about the walking around parts; earlier, when I didn't have a car, getting to the places was an impossibility. Beyond that, I'm physically healed enough to be able to take this on. But these are all good considerations, and thank you. I've gone down the copy-editing path, and so far the labor market there is still weak enough that it feels like servitude wages. If that imporoves, I'll definitely add it into my toolkit, becuase you're spot on: It's an excellent fit.

 

I made the website for belles and chimes; i made the discord and the ics calendar for band. this is all very good, and it helps me feel centered and whole.

I'm off to drop by Nic's under the guise of returning a left-behind item and using it as an opportunity to have what he will likely find a difficult conversation.

[Mistr]

I hope you have a productive conversation with Nic. Kudos to you for discussing the situation before it gets worse.

[Heidi]

7 hours ago, Mistr said:

I hope you have a productive conversation with Nic. Kudos to you for discussing the situation before it gets worse.

Thank you. I believe this is essential. 

It went well enough, and we’ll see what comes of it. I’m loosening my hold on expectations and doubling down on breathing gently and showing up for myself. All will be well. 

 

Tonight I finishedDaisy Jones & the Six and it blew me away. It was so good, and each episode seemed to get better. I’m fetched.

Tomorrow I’ll probably start Dead Boy Detectives after I get home from Vivian’s Spring concert.

I’m not expecting a hugely productive day tomorrow, since there is acupuncture in the morning, and that’s enough. Truly, all will be well. 

 

I think I’m going to use the initial post to keep track of what I’ve done and what remains. It’s a list with many moving parts, and I need a central location.

Some good percolating about the novel today. Percolating isn’t words on the page, but it’s helpful.

 

Sending good vibes and amazing music, songs that hit the emotions just right and sing them out into the world in a strong voice, with solidarity.

[Laghail]

Loooove the character sheet approach!!

[RES]

On 4/29/2024 at 6:17 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Could do with a little less on your plate

QFT

 

D went through the classes to get a real estate license but never could find the time to do the shadowing and finish getting the actual license...it's something that always drew her as well but time and other obligations got in the way. She still talks about doing it, so perhaps someday.

I hope the conversation went well.

My work life imploded so still haven't had the time for our date, what times of day/week are better for you?

[Scaly Freak]

On 4/29/2024 at 4:17 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Could do with a little less on your plate

 

On 4/29/2024 at 6:50 AM, Heidi said:

When is this never not true?  

 

And also, you are 100% correct. There's a lot (probably too much).

 

...have we not had conversations about this in the past? About taking on too much? More than once in the  past?

 

Ahem.  

[Heidi]

13 hours ago, RES said:

My work life imploded so still haven't had the time for our date, what times of day/week are better for you?

Dang, the parallel Heidi-RES Universe just keeps delivering.

My work has imploded as well, and revealed huge "OpportunityHere" signs that seem to have neon arrows and a carny-barker voice. There are so many red flags I thought it was the Circus.

And yet.

And yet, I'm stepping up and doing the InsertExtraWork for the promise of leadership and a permanent position. We'll see what comes of it.

As for BeatSaber, how does May 11th look? I'm only half joking. Everything is getting amazingly crammed, and while I'm excited about each and every piece of it, whew!!!! 

I have updated my calendar to include dancing classes on Wednesday nights, because I need a social, creative, active outlet that has nothing to do with my house or the internet.

I'm also looking forward to a season of plays and music, and whiel that seems kind of counterintuitive for a schedule that was too heavily loaded, it has been super helpful for taking things off the plate, some getting put in the NotNow category and some just getting filed under NOPE.

 

Speaking of NOPE. The conversation went well enough with Nic, and now his post-conversation is falling in line with expectations, which is disappointing, but really, it can't be helped. People are who they are, and it's my job to meet them where they are (while respecting my own commitments to myself). That's a lot of words to say that narcissists are going to narcissist, WhatchaGonnaDo*Shrug*? I am exceedingly punk in my internal compass, and before I matured I was an actual Goldman-Davis flavor of anarchist. I still think everything corporate is predatory. My views on government have gotten more texture as I've left pure anarchy behind, but they are still deeply informed by the social-programming vs. social programs matrix.

 

As for real estate, I took the real-life practice exam (50 of the 80 real questions) just to see how steep the learning curve is. I got so close to actually passing that it was encouraging (likely due to my background in real estate paralegal things). I don't think Virginia has a walk around / mentorship requirement, which is a real shame. I think I just take the test and pass and then take the certificate to a realty and sign up with that firm. The only difference between the firms is the fees and support things. I haven't done a deep dive for comparison, but I have a couple that Im intersted in, and basically I'm going to talk with a couple existing realtors and ask if they'd like a mentee/assistant as I figure out what's what about real estate in town, and then go with whichever realtor seems good to work with. It's all about relationships at this point. Also, I don't expect to do ANY of this until June or maybe even July, though spring is a hotbed of open houses, and the realtors would likely be happiest to consider an assistant at that time.

 

Yesterday's acupuncture visit was amazing. I hadn't thought I would find an acupuncturist I liked as well as Greg, let alone actualy might like more. Thank you Universe. The treatment he did almost lifted me off the table at one point, and I decided to sit with that as the intesity grew. I wanted to see if the spot (not surprisingly a spot that is literally labeled "the brain window") was trying to do its healing thing, which can often be least comfortable when it is being most effective. Sure enough, it was tolerable-though-intense, and then at some point while I was simply focusing on my breathing, it had released and turned to a cool spot. This is good. this is the Way. 

I'm scheduled for another appointment next week.

 

Property Taxes have been paid (for two years, I mean what the hell) and license plates have been renewed (for three years). These sorts of adulting-in-real-time things that involve standing in line for an hour are kind of obnoxious. The only upside is that I now live two blocks from the municipal building. I'm glad it's done.

 

Vivian's concert was absolutely grand. She's in 8th grade band, and they played Bohemeian Rhapsody and it made my GenX heart sing. Also, the whole band is just great. It's a joy to listen to. The 7th grade band before them was so huge I thought it must be the whole school. It's got to be close to 100 students. This is great, and I'm so impressed with the music program at her school. Music is helping her thrive, and this program might be the best in town. Thank you Universe for putting what she needed in her path. She didn't get to  see the 7th grade performance, since she didn't arrive until just before 8th grade took the stage. She won't get to see the high school concert tomorrow, either, which is a real shame, since so many of the high school band students have been materially important to her emotional growth (via her involvement with the marching band). I'm going and promised to send her pictures.

 

I have a massive amount of paperwork type things to do for this SparklingOpportunity at work, and I'm kind of reluctant to do it, given the history. I have to sit with putting the history aside (not denying it, just not giving it center-focus) so that I can make good, supportive decisions and results. This is going to go on all week, most likely. 

 

Did I mention that I'm going dancing tonight?  First of a six-week session of Swing Dancing, one of my favorites.

 

HAPPY BELTANE!

Here's to a seson of honoring our victories and plotting our path to abundance!

Flowers and Strawberries and Dancing, O My!

 

 

[Heidi]

Happy May Day!

Work exploded and I have An Impossible Project to complete before 9 am tomorrow, which means 8 am, and I’m nearly done with it. I’ll probably log in tomorrow morning around 7 to finish it up.

 

BUT!

Tonight I started a West Cost Swing dance class and wow, it was so much fun! I know nothing about West Coast Swing, and it was really a lovely class. After learning the forms, we paired off and started doing the dance, and I was having such a good time. My partner of the moment (we rotate so that we get more experience with different people’s styles of dancing) said I was just so beautiful that she could barely look at me, and I checked to make sure she wasn’t joking, and then said thank you. I was really enjoying myself, and it must have showed. Also, I just love dancing in general. The best part is that everyone else was wearing tennis shoes. I took my dance shoes, but by the end of the 90 (+ an extra 15) minute class, my feet were aching and I was ready to get off the dance floor. I’m looking forward to going next week. I also really like that the instructor doesn’t use numbers for the instruction (just Slow or Quick) and she even said “please don’t practice.” Such a keeper.

 

I am tired but filled.

My mind is still awake, and I’m hungry, so even though the clock time is all wrong, I think it’s time for a salad and a glass of milk and an episode of Dead Boy Detectives.

 

Life is good.

❤️ 

[DarK_RaideR]

6 hours ago, Heidi said:

Tonight I started a West Cost Swing dance class

Heidi

 

I'm glad you're doing things and enjoying yourself

 

BUT

 

what did we just say about having too much on your plate already?

[sarakingdom]

13 hours ago, Heidi said:

Tonight I started a West Cost Swing dance class

 

Such envy. Totally would if one were near me. I have DVDs and everything. (That I have not yet done, so...)

 

But also:

7 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

I'm glad you're doing things and enjoying yourself

 

BUT

 

what did we just say about having too much on your plate already?

 

I mean, this. Although if you're strictly prohibited from practicing... maybe? I mean, be fair, DR, it's just one little thing and who could resist and if it counts as a daily walk, it's not technically more things, just a syncopated version of old things...

 

[Laghail]

Swing dance sounds so lovely!!

[Heidi]

8 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

what did we just say about having too much on your plate already?

I KNOW, RIGHT?!?!

But.

But by going to dance class, I actually am removing so many more things from my list of things to do — it’s about realigning my expectations.

Of course, I’m saying that while completely swamped at work because of the Impossible Projects but even that seems to have the bonus of sucking up all my focus when I’m working on it. It’s kind of refreshing to have to stop worrying about All The Things and just focus on one spreadsheet or document.

 

Nope, I haven’t written any of the novel.

Nope, I haven’t taken the real estate exam.

Nope, I haven’t put together any furniture yet this week (yes, I know it’s only Thursday).

Nope, I haven’t.

Probably not going to get done next week either.  

 

Of all these things, the only one that gives me a twinge of sadness is the novel. Yes, I’d like to pick that up and work on it. Vivian is bringing her novel with her and we are looking forward to a rainy Saturday afternoon writing session. Look for weekly word counts instead of daily ones, and that’s all good too. This is the Way.

 

I am looking forward to going to the movies tomorrow at the independent cinema that I love so much. I am more interested in putting things on my calendar that take me out of the house and interrupt the nasty cycle of toxic productivity. Dancing and movie-going are the opposite of Getting Things Done, and that’s exactly what this Druid needs as everything launches forth.

 

I still haven’t made a Philosophy & Star Trek flier yet, so that’s probably next on my list even before assembling furniture and things. The meeting is in two weeks.  

 

The pace of this week is wearing me out mentally, and I’m glad that my evening activities are all non-intellectual endeavors (bonus points for getting more steps!).

 

 

[DarK_RaideR]

13 hours ago, sarakingdom said:

if it counts as a daily walk, it's not technically more things, just a syncopated version of old things...

9 hours ago, Heidi said:

But.

But by going to dance class, I actually am removing so many more things from my list of things to do — it’s about realigning my expectations.

Let's just say it's a repackaging of a few old things and leave it at that.

 

I'm glad you're doing as well as you are.

[Heidi]

19 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

Let's just say it's a repackaging of a few old things and leave it at that.

You’re wise.

 

The movie tonight was The Fall Guy, and I knew I would enjoy it but I didn’t know it would fill my heart up so very much. I really enjoyed everything about the film, even including the running musical theme of a Kiss song, and when I came home I played a couple rounds in Beat Saber ( @RES, I think I have some time opening up on Saturday and Sunday evening, if it fits with your schedule.  )

 

The Impossible Project at work was finished just as the toxic director landed a whole new bag of flaming poo on the team, which in most ways meant me, even though I was scheduled to leave at noon. I did a heroic amount of investigation and analysis before 11, and met with the senior developer on our team to discuss how this might get solutioned, and then off I went to therapy, followed a brilliant meeting with my Advisor (I might graduate in June 2025???), followed by a massage that was another round of amazing, and then back to work to test the solution that had been worked and applied to the test environment while I was away. The toxic director wanted a hotfix to production (at 5 pm on Friday) but the solution is clunky and will require many additional workaround steps, but has the added bonus of being slower than snails 🤦‍♀️. My official recommendation was that we all meet on Monday morning to demo the solution and get a training session for affected users in place before we go making a change to production. This made everyone as happy as they were going to be, and left the toxic director yelling at everyone and anyone that he wanted to know why there was a problem in the first place. I told him I hadn’t done an Root Cause Analysis on that yet (I suspect an Oracle Patch update) and that I would look into it on Monday, and then wished him a good weekend and logged out. ❤️ 

 

Anyway, I’m in a great mood and ready for a cup of tea and a reasonable bedtime.

I’ve been sleeping brilliantly since Wednesday, and this makes everything easier (including chucking things right back off my plate, because yes, @DarK_RaideR is still right). 

[RES]

On 5/1/2024 at 11:06 AM, Heidi said:

As for BeatSaber, how does May 11th look?

I will be out of town that weekend  because of course I will...

 

On 5/3/2024 at 9:56 PM, Heidi said:

( @RES, I think I have some time opening up on Saturday and Sunday evening, if it fits with your schedule.  )

I thought Saturday would, but then I got caught up in work and never put the headset back on after my morning workout  

 

 

[Darciana]

I am here to support, even if I go silent ❤️ 

[Heidi]

15 hours ago, RES said:

I will be out of town that weekend  because of course I will...

 

I thought Saturday would, but then I got caught up in work and never put the headset back on after my morning workout  

 

 

No worries -- I didn't see the message until I logged in on Sunday, becuase I'm still a noob about Oculus messaging.  

We are quite the pair.

❤️ 

1 hour ago, Darciana said:

I am here to support, even if I go silent ❤️ 

Welcome, as ever! ❤️ 

 

The work circus bled into early Monday, and after three hours, I think I've got it smoothened out. As always, admin running around with their hair on fire only make everything more chaotic. We have a solution identified, applied, and tested, and a root cause identified, but not a cause of the root cause, and analyzing that is now listed as Next Steps. This fits in admin speak, so we're all able to breathe now.

 

Nic wrote to ask if we could talk "about how this week went." I have no idea what that means, but I said that I have some time after 5. He suggested he come to my place at 5:30. I suggested we meet at a cafe nearby. I expect he's planning on dumping me, which is a hoot since I think we haven't been dating since Monday last week, but whatever. This is reminiscent of the conversation Jenna asked for last summer, and my attitude and approach to it is the same. All will be well. 

 

Physically I feel kind of crappy today, but slow going is making everything fine enough. 

Vivian and I had a lovely visit on Saturday and then again on Sunday. Beat Saber records were broken, music was played and listened to, and a good time was had by all.